finding dancing buddies

[twincities]

hi, i'm new to the board so i don't know if this topic has already been covered.

i started latin dancing about a year ago and i really, really love it. however, i haven't been able to get much better because i can't seem to find anyone who wants to go out w/me... so, i'm not that great still cuz i don't get much "real" practice in (actually dancing with partners).

i have contemplated going to the clubs/places that they play latin music alone but i have to confess i'm a bit of a chicken about it.

should i just get over it and start going by myself? how can i meet others who are also into latin dancing so that i have some ppl to go with?

many times i have had ppl commit to go and then they back out at the last minute. it's frustrating (and a bit depressing because i feel like i can't find anyone who wants to do this as much as i do).

i could always join a dance studio and meet ppl that way, but i don't know if i could really afford the prices.

if anyone has any advice, i would greatly appreciate it. or, even share your stories about how you got to know ppl at the clubs/dance places.

i'm not a shy person -- i'm quite outgoing but i don't know how to get over this.

thanks for your time!!

[dTas]

i don't know about where you live but around here there are public dances, not in bars or clubs, where people can go to dance.

many studios offer public dances for people to come and dance. you don't have to belong to the studio. all you do is pay a cover and you can dance all night (although in a studio you usually dance all the dances and not just salsa).

i know where i practice they have a dedicated salsa room as well as an open ballroom room.

there are also other places around that cater to the salsa crowd that are more "beginner friendly".

where/how are you learning to dance? doesn't that establishement offer some sort of open dancing to practice with others?

[twincities]

well, i took a community educ class & that's how i got introduced to latin dancing. it was once a week (for 6 - 8 weeks) & it's part of the public schools so there's really no place to practice.

i guess because it's set up that way, the ppl who sign up for the class usually aren't that serious about learning -- they just want to get a bit of exposure to it and that's it.

i haven't looked at studios -- i guess i just assumed that you had to be a member to attend the parties. perhaps i'll look into that.

i did go to a public dance once that was held as part of a festival, but it seemed like everyone who was there came in groups so if you didn't know each other, then you were out of luck for finding some ppl to dance with.

i don't know about where you live, but it seems that the latin dance community here is quite small so everyone seems to know each other. it is a bit intimidating to break into that scene... it just seems a bit too "cliquey."

anyway, thanks for the insight.

[genEus]

it is a bit intimidating to break into that scene... it just seems a bit too "cliquey."


Just a tiny bit of advice... You should really forget the word "intimidating" if you are ever to become serious about dancing. You will be intimidated by 1) Amazing leaders, 2) Amazing followers, 3) Amazing instructors, 4) Cliques, 5) Clubs and atmosphere, etc.

Really, it's just like jumping in a pool, yes, when you touch it with one foot the water seems really cold but jump in head first and then it's not so bad!

Yes a lot of salsa groups are "cliquey." Thankfully I was oblivious to that fact when I started out, to my own benefit... and somehow I slipped into a "clique." But, that's what you would define us as, we'd never actually consider ourselves one - we're all nice people and as long as you're a decent guy or girl and are passionate about salsa you'll fit in, regardless of your dancing ability. Yes there are nasty people out there but then why would you ever want to be with them?

[Rosa]

how can i meet others who are also into latin dancing so that i have some ppl to go with?

Go to classes. This is definitely the best way to meet like-minded people. You mentioned having been in community educ salsa classes, so why not get in touch with some of the people who were in the class with you and see if they want to go out dancing?

I know studios can be expensive, but, at least in the UK where I am, most larger cities have pubs or clubs which run salsa classes at reasonable prices (£4 - £5 per hour) and you pay on a week-by-week basis rather than having to pay for a course upfront. Some of them even run free classes, as a inducement to get people into the place. So, that would be an ideal way of getting to know people who want to go out dancing.

I know you said you were chicken about going to clubs alone, but in my experience most people there would be in the same position as you, so no need to worry. Most of them will be just as glad as you are to find a friendly face to talk to!

If you give us an indication of what area you're living in, I'm sure there'll be members of DF who can help you more.

Good luck, and welcome to DF! :D

Rosa :)

[MacMoto]

In our scene there are quite a few monthly salsa events/socials, and these are not cliquey or intimidating like some clubs can be. If you have something similar, you can start going to these places, chat to and get to know the people there, and ask them about clubs they go to. Explain your situation and ask them if you could come along with them. Once you know regulars in the scene, going to clubs on your own becomes much easier.

I agree with Rosa about going to salsa classes run at club venues -- best way to get into the club scene.

[TheLetterJ]

You should go to a few beginner classes just to meet people and see if anyone wants to go out dancing as a group. It's less intimidating when you're with a group of people at your level. Also there are some studios that have public dances so they're also more friendly than a bar. Maybe contact the studios and ask them where are good places to go out dancing.

I think most of the good/experienced dancers went through all the same experiences so you're not alone. Oh btw, if you're in the twincities, MN, drop me a line and I can show you a few places.

[twincities]

thanks for the advice, everyone.

i have decided that i will go ahead & take some classes to meet others who are into dancing, too. that does sound like the best idea.

i'm glad to hear that i'm not alone in my situation.

thanks again!!

PS i am from the twin cities (MN) -- i've actually gone to quite a few of the places that have latin dance, although i haven't gone to any of the venues that feature live music for a while (lately, i've only been going to first ave on thurs nights). my favorite place was mpls cafe before they shut it down. :(

[Sagitta]

Good to hear you are taking some classes twincities. :) Try and choose classes where there is a dance later that night at teh same place, or another...so then you can ask people if they are going/interested. If they express reticience then suggest that you newbies will have each other.