Is it normal, and does it go away

[Vin]

I am going to dance in a performance (my first exhibition) on friday with a woman whom I am very attracted to, at least I was before we started preparing for this exhibition. We don't fight, but we are pretty much both sick of looking at each other for the moment. Does this go away shortly after the performance and is this normal.
thanks

[Vince A]

I am going to dance in a performance (my first exhibition) on friday with a woman whom I am very attracted to, at least I was before we started preparing for this exhibition. We don't fight, but we are pretty much both sick of looking at each other for the moment. Does this go away shortly after the performance and is this normal.
thanks
This is your first exhibition . . . it should be fun. "When it stops becoming fun, you need to stop."

"Do you have to win? No, it's an exhibition! You don't need a judge or some scores to tell you how you did. Keep it fun!"

I had this same problem with someone who I was going to do an showcase exhibition of five dances with, and a Pro dancer had overheard us constantly bickering on the floor. He came over and told me what I passed on to you. We never ever had another disrespectful thing to say to each other while dancing, nor did we fight. We kept it fun.

Was I attracted to this person? Oh yes, very much so. She is my wife and best friend.

[SDsalsaguy]

Vin... you say this is your first such event so chances have it that the intensity of the practices and interactions – at least in this setting – are something totally new to you. Add in the attraction you mention – and the entire extra emotional load that entails – and you have quite a heavy situation. Listen to Vince... enjoy it for what it is, DANCING! Take a little time off (however you define this) from each other after you perform and see how things settle down. I know a partner can get on my last nerve but I'll still want to be right back to practicing with them...

Please keep us posted.

[DanceMentor]

I've definitely had partners that I argued with before the performance. When you are both nervous it is easy for emotions to start to get wild. It is important that you both understand this and try to direct this feeling toward wanting to help and reassure the other person.

[Vince A]

Vin,
Yes, please keep us posted.

If you have to, yell at us on the DF, then get back to her and dance and enjoy her company.

Vince

[Vin]

Thanks everybody, yeah it is getting better. Now that we have our whole routine created and we feel good about it we both are tired but can't wait to practice it. So that is good. We weren't really arguing as the situation is a bit tricky due to the unrequited attraction. We have also started talking about future performances as I think we are both getting hooked.
Thanks again.

[SDsalsaguy]

Glad to hear it's working out Vin... let us know how the performance goes too, OK?

[Vin]

Hello again everyone, the performance went great. We had a couple of mistakes but nobody in the audience would notice. Just a couple of things that weren't done at the right moment in the music. We are probably going to do this sort of thing again. But I am probably going to take a week off of salsa, unless anyone knows any salsa parties in my area tonight :D . Thanks again for the great support you guys gave me.

[Sagitta]

Glad to hear that everything went well. :) Congratulations!

A break is sometimes good. It reignites the passion or turns up the heat.

[SDsalsaguy]

Glad to hear the performance went so well for you Vin! Enjoy your respite, and then go have some more fun dancing! :D

[salsachinita]

Good on you, Vin! And what an encouraging bunch of fellow dancers we have here :D !
Years ago, I was bickering constantly with my then-dancer partner, but as soon as we both left the company, we became great partners in the social scene...! He was dubbed as the 'Washing Machine' ('coz he puts you thru the tumble cycle & spins you dry!) and we had a lot of fun.
I guess taking a break (and the pressure off yourselves) worked wonders!

[Pacion]

Vin, do you have an update for enquiring minds :wink:

[Vin]

enquiring minds.....
I haven't performed salsa since, I did do a swing performance this spring that went really well.
Her and I don't talk or dance together anymore. We had a disagreement and she pretty much despises me now. It's a pity really, we used to really come alive together on the dance floor, she is such a beautiful dancer and really a nice girl, just alot of anger in her heart.