Teaching a Lead, and Finding a Partner

[Trillspots]

I've been dancing for...about four months now, I know several dances, from waltz, to samba, to ECS - and...I've been looking for someone to dance with me consistently, to be able to meet with me to practice, etc. and - I'd like some advice on finding a partner. Our local bop club (where I dance) and BLS club, is all composed of mostly older couples who already have partners. The younger people that do come come as couples - and aren't looking for partners. So...I'm at a loss of what to do. I'm not a very social person - and, I don't have a lot of peer friends. I'm friendly enough, I just don't go to a lot of teen events, etc. plus, younger guys aren't normally too thrilled at the idea of swing dancing. So, perhaps I'm making more of a dillemma than there should be, but - I'd like to be able to practice, and enter some ammature competitions eventually - which...I can't really do without a partner, as far as I know.

Also, a friend of mine, (Not a potential partner, just someone casually interested.) has been coming over - asking me about how to dance, etc. I'm very good at following - but I know very little about leading, and he gets frustrated because I can't teach him that. I've tried to explain that to him, but he continues pushing - so, any advice on this subject would be good too.

Thanks,
-Trill

[quixotedlm]

Also, a friend of mine, (Not a potential partner, just someone casually interested.) has been coming over - asking me about how to dance, etc. I'm very good at following - but I know very little about leading, and he gets frustrated because I can't teach him that. I've tried to explain that to him, but he continues pushing - so, any advice on this subject would be good too.

You can try posting on www.dancepartner.com (http://www.dancepartner.com) for partners. Even if your scene is full of folks who don't have partners, finding a partner can be non-trivial. You just have to wait for the right circumstances to present itself sometimes :)

If you are beginner/intermediate dancer yourself, you can't teach a guy to lead. In most cases, even advanced followers can't teach someone to lead (but can help an astute lead teach himself). The only way you are going to make a horse out of your mule is by sending him to charm school :) Make him take lessons, or look for somebody else...

Did you say he is casually interested? In you? That can be a powerful motivator you know ;).

[Trillspots]

He's casually interested in dancing...not interested in me at all. And, not someone who would want to be my partner. He's cheap, and I keep telling him I can't teach him how to dance but...he keeps asking. I think I've finally convinced him though, to wait and take the classes at the bop club.

Thanks for the link, I'll try that out.

-Trill

EDIT: I signed up with the link - and did a search for people in my area - a very lax search with very few restrictions...and a wide age range, and came up with, one. Any other suggestions would be welcome - I started looking before I even started dancing (So, for about 6 months now), with the hope that I'd find someone who could learn with me, and although I've been glad to have some practice with experienced dancers, without having to learn the mistakes and bad habits from another beginner - I'm really getting eager for a partner, now that I've gotten better.

[waltzgirl]

Sadly, if we had a secret place to find partners, we'd all have one! It's a problem for women of all ages-there are just more women than men interested in dancing.

At your age, the one place you might have a better chance of finding a guy who might be interested in learning to dance would be a drama class or club. My nephew, who I'd have thought was about the last person to want to dance, started acting in high school--and lo and behold, before long he's in a dance class.

[kayak]

Take a look at Ballroom-Arkansas.com http://www.ballroom-arkansas.com (http://www.ballroom-arkansas.com/)

They might have some interesting events to try. It sounds like you got a good start and just need to find some people to go dancing with.