He left me on the dancefloor [Archive]

MadamSamba

12-28-2003, 10:09 PM

Ok, I'm not a violent person, but last night's adventures left my blood boiling. I was at an event at which a fabulous salsa band was playing.

A guy who I usually dance with at a salsa venue I frequent turned up and asked me to dance. He is awkward to dance with, has a very weak lead and simply makes up moves that are neigh impossible to follow and often changes his mind half way through a move. He's generally unpopular as a result, so I don't like to say no to him. I figure it's only 3 minutes and hell, I'm not exactly Ginger Rogers.

Anyway, we're in the middle of this awkward salsa and, given the floor was outrageously crowded with mostly non-salsa dancers, I kept my moves small and discrete for fear of whacking someone in the face or worse. Regardless, he insisted on doing grandiose moves and I felt really uncomfortable but kept dancing...halfway through the dance he leans over and says, "My friend's calling me, I've got to go" and, without even waiting for an answer, simply walks away. (I didn't actually see anyone calling him and he walked towards nobody in particular.)

I was absolutely livid, but he's partially deaf and didn't hear me calling him back. He disappeared into the crowd and though I didn't see him the rest of the night, I will see him at an event later in the week...am I right to be seriously offended by his behaviour? He's seriously uncouth and, I feel, as though he thought my salsa was crappy and simply didn't want to dance with me anymore. Either way, you don't just walk off the dancefloor in the middle of a dance...has anyone else had this sort of experience? What did you do?

Personally, I've no intention of being diplomatic. Next time he asks me to dance (which he probably won't), or when I next see him, I intend to tell him off solidly for his rude behaviour...but I probably should leave it, I'm literally the only person he's got to dance with at the other venue, probably because he's anything but a gentleman... argh :twisted: :twisted:

NeoDevin

12-28-2003, 10:14 PM

I'd say you are right to be mad, and well within your rights to tell him off next time you see him. If a follow ever did that to me, it would be a long time before I danced with her again.

SDsalsaguy

12-28-2003, 10:59 PM

The guy sounds like a pompous @$$ MadamSamba, plain and simple.

Not at that level, but last night I saw a guy in one of the classes trying to tell a newbie how she was supposed to finish the pattern with her hand/arm on the other side of his head. Ummm, hello? That's because he was supposed to duck under it genius!

Sagitta

12-28-2003, 11:07 PM

Either way, you don't just walk off the dancefloor in the middle of a dance...has anyone else had this sort of experience? What did you do?

Personally, I've no intention of being diplomatic. Next time he asks me to dance (which he probably won't), or when I next see him, I intend to tell him off solidly for his rude behaviour...but I probably should leave it, I'm literally the only person he's got to dance with at the other venue, probably because he's anything but a gentleman... argh :twisted: :twisted:

I absolutely agree. That never is done. Leaving a person like that on adance floor is inexcusable. I've seen situations when couples stop dancing when something comes up, but they have always been handled diplomatically.

As for telling that person off...you could do the opposite -completely ignore him. Not even acknowledge his existence. :twisted: Probably drive him up the wall. :) :twisted:

Adeline

12-28-2003, 11:20 PM

Since you are "literally the only person he's got to dance with at the other venue", that's you big chance to diss him!!!

pygmalion

12-29-2003, 01:24 AM

What a jerk! I say tell him off to your heart's content. Ginger Rogers or no, you have the right to expect moderately polite behavior from him. Let him sit out a few (hundred) dances. That's not your problem. He used up you good will. Oh! The things people do in the name of dancing. Whatever happened to good old fashioned good manners? :?

youngsta

12-29-2003, 02:09 AM

That's totally messed up! :evil: I had this happen to me with one of my instructors partners about 10 months ago. From then on she was always asking me why I wouldn't dance with her anymore. I probably should have just got it off my chest but I decided to say nothing. About a month ago she sat down next to me, smiled, and just looked at me, then the dancefloor, then me again. I must have been in a good mood because I FINALLY gave in :lol:

KevinL

12-29-2003, 09:23 AM

His behaviour was rude and unacceptable. However, telling him off will lower your etiquette to his level. I would suggest simply saying, "No." whenever he asks you to dance. If he ever has the guts to ask why, explain it simply, without anger. "You abandoned me on the dance floor, and that is unacceptable behaviour."

If he explains his behaviour (maybe you couldn't see where he was going?) you might consider being the bigger person and agreeing to dance again. Or not, considering that he is, in general, an unsafe and rude partner.

Kevin

Sagitta

12-29-2003, 09:25 AM

Great advice Kevin!! I wholeheartedly agree with you about not lowering oneself to that guy's level. :)

pygmalion

12-29-2003, 09:32 AM

I agree that a yelling, screaming rant would lower her to his level, and below even. But there's more than one way of skinning a cat. And to me, waiting passively until he asks her to dance or asks why he's being refused doesn't work. It puts the control in HIS hands. Madam Samba assertively approaching him, explaining the problem, her feelings about it, and what she wants him to do to make amends works a lot better for me. And she can tell him off quite effectively without ever having to raise her voice. :wink:

:lol: :lol: Sarcasm works too! :twisted: Just kidding. :lol:

salsachinita

12-29-2003, 09:57 AM

Ok, sister, point him out to me & I will fix him :twisted: !

Having said that, I've done this to a guy years ago but it's not what you think.....!

We got introduced by a neutral friend, and we got dancing. Everything when well until strands of my hair flew into my mounth. While trying to spit them out, I had somehow got the chewing gum in my mouth all tangled up with my hair, AND the more I try to fix it (without anyone noticing) the worse it got :shock: ! So I had no choice (couln't even finish that song coz I couldn't see :shock: ) but to excuse myself (without being able to speak properly) and ran to the ladies.........

I came back to explain the whole deal to the poor guy, but he didn't really believe me :roll: .......... and I think it was YEARS before he asked me to dance again!

pygmalion

12-29-2003, 10:07 AM

Yup. That's why I stick to my recommendation of the assertive approach -- it gives her a chance to address her feelings, and gives him a chance to weasle out .. er... explain what happened. :lol: :lol: Just kidding, salsachinita. Surely the guy you're talking about must have seen your distress with the hair and the gum, etc. What was his deal, being so unforgiving? Sorry. I digress. :wink:

salsachinita

12-29-2003, 10:13 AM

Incidentally, I have been there at the receiving end too.

My favourite lead (THAT obnoxious one who dresses in gangsta style but dances super smooth.......you guys must have heard me talk about him quite a few times by now :wink: ) did that to me a couple of years ago.

He simply dropped me in the middle of the song, if he felt that my performance didn't match his. Because to this guy, the whole point of dancing is to (A) show off in front of his friends/the public, or (B) to woo a girl :roll: !

But knowing how shallow he really is (AND how fantastic a dancer he really is) I didn't even allow myself to get upset over that. I took it as a challenge, as a bit of a 'standard' that I ask myself to keep :twisted: ! Afterall, I havn't got THAT many challenges in my local salsa scene.......it keeps me on my toes :wink: (literally)!

salsachinita

12-29-2003, 10:15 AM

Surely the guy you're talking about must have seen your distress with the hair and the gum, etc. What was his deal, being so unforgiving? Sorry. I digress. :wink:

I guess he was too busy worrying about his bruised ego :lol: ?!

peachexploration

12-29-2003, 10:21 AM

...... He is awkward to dance with, has a very weak lead and simply makes up moves that are neigh impossible to follow and often changes his mind half way through a move. He's generally unpopular as a result, so I don't like to say no to him.

This guy is a JERK and needs to SMACKED!!! :evil: But since you can't do that without going to jail :wink: , I would tell him "calmly" the next time I saw him why that was rude and point out reasons why no one else will dance with him. After that, I would definitely steer clear and make it a point not to dance with him for a while. How rude!! :evil:

borikensalsero

12-29-2003, 12:43 PM

I believe you should go up to him and tell him you exact feelings minus the cursing and why because of such rude behavior on his part you will no longer dance with him. When he is ready to be a gentleman he can come ask again. But don’t, don’t. Let him suffer! Let him suffer. Boy, we are mean.

NeoDevin

12-29-2003, 01:12 PM

I think you should seduce him, get him into bed and really turned on, then say to him "See how you like to be abandoned!", and walk away...

DancingMommy

12-29-2003, 03:19 PM

I think you should seduce him, get him into bed and really turned on, then say to him "See how you like to be abandoned!", and walk away...

ROFLOL.... That's a good one........

borikensalsero

12-29-2003, 04:19 PM

I think you should seduce him, get him into bed and really turned on, then say to him "See how you like to be abandoned!", and walk away...

Yes, look at him, and giggle and say, someone is calling you. :D

Boy, Neo, you can be hired as a personal "how to get back at him/her" trainer.

NeoDevin

12-29-2003, 05:15 PM

Boy, Neo, you can be hired as a personal "how to get back at him/her" trainer.

:D My financial problems are solved!!!!!! ;)

Pacion

06-28-2004, 06:26 PM

:doh: NeoDevin :lol:

I wonder if guys have ever had this happen to them - that the girl suddenly leaves them on the dancefloor :oops:

pygmalion

06-28-2004, 06:28 PM

I just skimmed through page two of this thread. I fear you're making light of a serious subject. when I got left on the dance floor (by a teacher!) I almost quit dancing. It was WAY serious to me. :? :( :x

Pacion

06-28-2004, 06:46 PM

It wasn't me who said it Pygmalion! :oops: It was Neo. Anyway, in the interests of equality I posed the question to see if the guys have any stories to tell/share :oops:

In my dancing life, I think I have only ever been left on the dancefloor twice - both times by guys who were there with one thing and one thing only on their minds :roll: How do I know what was on their mind? They both asked me if I had a boyfriend, within 30 seconds of dancing together :roll: :?

I then spied them looking miserable at the edge of the dancefloor later on in the evening because the other girls were turning down their 'dance requests' :twisted:

Both times, I was also at a venue I had never been to before and didn't really know anyone so, almost went home :oops: but decided in the end to stay and brazen it out :lol:

pygmalion

06-28-2004, 06:51 PM

True, Pacion. I understand. My only point is that getting left on the dance floor can be a traumatic experience. I'm no longer studying with the teacher who did that to me, but, right at the moment, I have the urge to drive to his studio and punch him in the nose!!!! It's about the most disrespectful thing you can do to another dancer. Being on the receiving end feels ... there's no polite word to capture how it feels. In retrospect, I still can't believe that my TEACHER would have done such a thing. What a loser kind of thing to do. I certainly deserve much better. Everybody does. :?

MadamSamba

06-28-2004, 06:51 PM

Oh, Pacion and Jen...I fit into that camp too!

The other night I was dancing with an overly frisky guy who, unfortunately, is one of the best dancers at my studio so women line up to dance with him, and he slapped me on the bottom. I was mortified. How bloody dare he. I stopped in the middle of our jive, told him never to assume such liberties with me again and walked off. He was very embarrased, I was very embarrassed and he later apologised.

The next time I saw him, we danced and he made some lecherous comment about my legs. He kept twirling and twirling and twirling me (dangerously fast) and when I asked him what he was doing, he said he wanted to see my legs in the mirror! He was trying to get my skirt to twirl up and didn't worry about the fact that I was incredibly, danerously dizzy. Again, I walked off on him.

EEEKK...

jon

06-28-2004, 06:55 PM

I wonder if guys have ever had this happen to them - that the girl suddenly leaves them on the dancefloor :oops:

Happened to a friend who was learning to swing dance. One of the advanced follows, who had a notably sharp tongue, got really harsh and then walked off on him, not because of injury but because he was so new and unskilled. The poor guy was crushed and pretty much stopped dancing as a result.

Pacion

06-28-2004, 06:58 PM

Oh MadamSamba! Sorry to hear that! He sounds like a bit of a jerk, if he is going to do something once and apologized for it :?

Sorry to hear about your friend Jon. I don't know where 'advanced' dancers/teachers get the idea that they are the best thing since sliced bread :roll: Attitude is so much a part of dancing but not THAT kind of attitude :( I am very patient with beginners, unless they are drunk :roll:

pygmalion

06-28-2004, 06:58 PM

Yes, MadamSamba, there are two sides to every story. There's the person who leaves (for a right or wrong reason) and the person who gets left (for a right or wrong reason.)

My TEACHER left me on the dance floor because I was stiff and not following to his spec. As it so happens, I had some major family issues going on that night, but went to the studio outing anyway, to support said teacher. And he treated me VERY badly. In front of the forty-odd other members of his studio who showed up that night. :x

There's a huge difference between that and setting limits with someone who doesn't observe minimal dance etiquette courtesies. You were right, MadamSamba, and so was I. 8)

dancin_feet

06-28-2004, 07:19 PM

The other night I was dancing with an overly frisky guy who, unfortunately, is one of the best dancers at my studio so women line up to dance with him, and he slapped me on the bottom. I was mortified. How bloody dare he. I stopped in the middle of our jive, told him never to assume such liberties with me again and walked off. He was very embarrased, I was very embarrassed and he later apologised.

The next time I saw him, we danced and he made some lecherous comment about my legs. He kept twirling and twirling and twirling me (dangerously fast) and when I asked him what he was doing, he said he wanted to see my legs in the mirror! He was trying to get my skirt to twirl up and didn't worry about the fact that I was incredibly, danerously dizzy. Again, I walked off on him.

EEEKK...

Is there a situation that this would be seen as cheeky game playing in your eyes MadamSamba? Reason I ask is that the two male instructors at our studio (my instructor and the owner of the studio) do this to me, but I just take it as part of the game. It's not constant, only every now and then, and all in good fun, so it doesn't mean anything. I have even been known to give my instructor a whack on the bum in retaliation! Of course, they don't do it to everyone, just the people who are willing to "play the game". None of the students do it to each other, and it would certainly be quite unwelcome from some of the guys.

To me, you are already in reasonably intimate contact with your partner and especially your own instructor can pretty much know you well enough on that level to make that sort of play acceptable. What happens on the floor, stays on the floor. They know I won't suffer in silence and if I'm not in the mood to "play" like that, they are pretty good at picking that up.

That said I have never left or been left on the dancefloor. Even if it is horrible, I'll stick it out thinking that this is giving them practice to make them better. The beginners hands around the back can be a problem, but I'll generally try to backlead them into an underarm turn or something so that I can try to reposition their hand without causing them undue embarrassment. If it goes back in the same spot, I'll say something like, "you'll lead better with your hand here" and move it myself.

pygmalion

06-28-2004, 07:26 PM

Yes, it IS horrible, and it's impossible to stick it out, unless you enjoy dancing by yourself.

No disrespect, here, but I suspect you're envisioning a different scenario. Getting LEFT on the dance floor is exactly how it sounds. Dancing away, and mid-dance, in the midst of a crowd, getting left standing there by your so-called dance partner. That is not a game in a dance studio among friends. It's a humiliating experience in a nightclub among strangers. Not quite the same thing ... :roll: :(

dancin_feet

06-28-2004, 07:30 PM

I have danced in a club before. And the answer still is no, I have never left or been left on the dancefloor. I agree in a club the rules are different, and unless you know the person really well, certain types of physical contact would be unacceptable.

So are you saying that you would accept this behaviour in a controlled environment, like at a studio social or whatever? Or it is just totally unacceptable to you?

Genesius Redux

06-28-2004, 07:39 PM

DancePoet

06-28-2004, 07:46 PM

The other evening at a social dance there was a young women who walked away from her partner during a cha-cha to answer her cell phone she had left on a table near by.

In my view, very wrong.

Now, perhaps she was expecting an extremely important call. Like family member on death bed or whatever. However, if it's really that important does one even belong at the social dance in the first place?

And if it was not extremely important, then under no circumstances should a person be leaving a partner to take a phone call. Just plain rude.

Therefore, if I decide to ask her for a dance, I will ask her promise she is not going to leave in the middle to answer her phone. If I decide to ask her. And if she asks me, the request will be the same.

Genesius Redux

06-28-2004, 07:51 PM

Madam Samba--

Don't people have any manners in the venues you're dancing? I'd have to be very good friends with someone before I smacked her on the bum, and even then I'd do it in the full expectation of immediate playful retaliation. What you're describing is behavior that, if I were to witness it directed against one of my women friends, I might very well invite the gentleman to adjourn to the nearest parking lot. I'm appalled just reading it.

Ditching someone on the floor can only be justified in the face of some really egregious behavior on the part of the person being ditched. In Jenn's case it sounds like it was done out of arrogance and hatefulness. But I known someone ditched quite deservedly. An extremely obnoxious teacher-manager at my first studio was messing with one of the women on the floor at a party. Evidently she wasn't doing an underarm turn the way he wanted her to and he kept trapping her in mid-turn and making her do it again. She asked him a couple of times to stop and he didn't. So at the first opportunity to do another underarm turn, she just kept walking off the floor. Left him, loser that he was, right in front of the bandstand on a crowded floor. And he had to walk across the entire crowded floor to get to his office, where he closed the door and didn't come out for the rest of the night.

This malignant piece of human garbage, by the way, puts a shock collar on his dog, who has become so demoralized that he is one of the slowest and least expressive labs I've ever seen.

So, yeah, Jeff deserved it. And good for her. Heard all about it later, only wish I'd been there to see it happen.

pygmalion

06-28-2004, 07:53 PM

True, Pacion. I understand. My only point is that getting left on the dance floor can be a traumatic experience. I'm no longer studying with the teacher who did that to me, but, right at the moment, I have the urge to drive to his studio and punch him in the nose!!!!

Jenn--we only use it for defense. But you know this. Calm down. He's not worth the anger.

xo

Genesius

I love you, GR. 8) At that moment, I really had the urge. My former teacher was a jerk, and deserves a broken nose, at least. But hey, I've spent the last couple years studying TaeKwondo, and I know better. Only in self defense. As far as the misguided teacher who disrespected me, I'm okay. He'll get his. That's how karma works. You build/earn yours, then you get it. I, personally, don't have to confront or teach him. Life will. 8)

Sagitta

06-28-2004, 08:50 PM

It happened to me once. And never again!! Anyone who does it will get the humiliation of their life time. I can be really sarcastic and put a person down if I want to, and if it isn't done for some sort of urgency they will get it.

I've stopped dancing with people quite a bit when someone is trying to say farewell to my partner, and I am getting over minding it. But never just to leave a person on the dancefloor! :shock: Usually if we are in the middle we go to the edge together, say our farewells, then go back to dancing.

goldfish

06-29-2004, 02:41 AM

that's SOOOO rude! if you ever dance with him again, backlead him superbly and suddenly ditch HIM.

okay that's just nasty :twisted: if he's a beginner dancer though, he might not know the etiquette involved in social dancing - it might seem very obviously rude to people who are experienced, but he might not know. it's possible to dance for years and not know what's expected if nobody tells you (or if you don't read DF voraciously :wink:)

if he asks you to dance again, i'd say no, but tell him the reason for it politely - maybe not emphasize the pissed part, but that it's rude and hurtful to be abandoned like that. 'cause if he keeps doing it over and over again, it's just gonna create a roomful of annoyed follows and a lead that will never get better or learn to really enjoy dancing

that said, i've had this done to me too :P the very first time i went social dancing, there was an impromptu jack n jill, and my partner was a classmate who never social danced before and was extremely tense. he lead me (very nervously) for a few phrases before he stopped dancing and freaked out. i begged him to go on and told him it was okay. he lead me for a few more counts, let go, RAN OUT OF THE ROOM. i bolted after him, ready to tell him off and found him outside full of stress and very, very jittery. didn't have the heart to tell him off, ended up trying to calm him down. (although i couldn't resist dropping a hint that his sudden departure freaked me out too..)

he spent the next two weeks apologizing every time he saw me :lol: :lol: , but now we're both very comfortable dancing with each other. and his dance manners are better than most leads now - he makes sure to dance with his follow and solely for his follow... and consciously emulates other leads that do the same. i think he watches leads more than i do :shock: who would have known?

Purr

06-29-2004, 07:08 AM

I got ditched on the dance floor by a teacher about 2 weeks ago. During the practice party, a jive came on on, and he asked me to dance. About about a minute into the song, he asks me, can I stop now? And then he walks off before I have a chance to respond. I was dumbfounded, because it wasn't like I dancing badly. He didn't do anything when he walked off, just go over and talk to his friends.

Pacion

06-29-2004, 07:16 AM

Sorry to hear that Purr. Hmmm, what can we do about these teachers? I can feel the 'lil devil in me wanting to come out and play :twisted:

Lita_rulez

06-29-2004, 07:26 AM

If he asks ever me to dance again, I'm just planning on saying no thank you, and walking off.

Then again, you might be better off accepting his invitation, following him to the dance floor, and once there, when he gets into position, as you feel the first hint that he is going to lead your first step, just slide away from his hold and say "then again, I don't think I want to dance with you just now. You mind if I stop ?" and turn away without even waiting for then answer.

That may not teach him a lesson, but you ought to feel a lot better then just saying "no" to his invitation.

Purr

06-29-2004, 09:12 AM

Sorry to hear that Purr. Hmmm, what can we do about these teachers? I can feel the 'lil devil in me wanting to come out and play :twisted:

What do you have in mind? Though, I do like Lita_rulez idea. :wink:

There's another story with this same teacher, that happened later during this same party. We were having a game switching dance partners. It was like musical chairs, the music would stop in the middle of a song and the last couple to switch had sit down. Well, I was dancing with my teacher, and this teacher and his partner are near us. It's agreed that at the next break we'd just switch between us. Well, the music stops, and my teacher does the switch with the other teacher's partner. What does this other teacher do? He leaves me standing, and goes halfway across the dance floor to dance with another woman! Of course, I'm the last one standing, and I have to sit down. He later claimed that he "forgot" about agreeing to switch. As it! :x

I've already come to the conclusion that for whatever reason, he doesn't like me. But, he is a teacher, and there's no excuse for making the students feel poorly, especially twice in one evening. :x

Pacion

06-29-2004, 12:43 PM

Hmmm, how long have you been going to this school? How about accidentally leaving out a few copies of an 'article' written by helpful DF friends :wink: talking about what teachers should/shouldn't do? You could leave them out anonomously or post them in and see if anything changes.

Whether he likes you or not should not matter. At the end of the day, you are paying HIS salary (albeit a small part) therefore, he should be more professional about it.

Purr

06-29-2004, 01:49 PM

Genesius Redux

06-29-2004, 04:02 PM

Whether he likes you or not should not matter. At the end of the day, you are paying HIS salary (albeit a small part) therefore, he should be more professional about it.

In all fairness, the problem is just him, not the studio in general. He's young, and a relatively new teacher. I think he just doesn't know any better. I know my teacher has been giving the staff training in customer service, so maybe this teacher will start to get a clue on how to act.

Exactly. No need to look for childish forms of personal revenge. Walk into the manager's office and complain. Better yet, write a letter and demand that something be done (a letter of apology or whatever). You don't have to play this teacher's little game of social chess. Put the guy's job on the line. After that, you can turn down his invitations to dance whenever you like.

The hierarchical structure of any company combined with the power of a buck gives the consumer plenty of power. Whether you use it or not, you have the power.

Chris Stratton

06-29-2004, 04:30 PM

Genesius Redux

06-29-2004, 05:51 PM

Customer service expectations and all are fine, but you also have to be clear about what business is being discussed.

The word "teacher" makes me think someone who instructs in or coaches dancing. I don't see dancing socially with students as a prime component of that role, though a little dancing with students at a social might be.

No argument from me--and I am the first person to recognize and any teacher's independence at a social gathering, and not at all likely to exploit a professional relationship outside the studio.

But many of these studios--not all--as you know have social dancing in the form of Friday and Saturday night parties at which the instructor's presence is part of the job description. At my first studio, for instance, the instructors were expected to work the parties--and they danced every dance with their students as well as other newcomers. That's part of the gig.

Like it or not (I don't), at such studios the instructors are there to promote an atmosphere conducive to social dancing and are there to make the evening as pleasant as possible for the students (customers). What I had thought Purr was talking about was just such a situation--not a night out on the town where an instructor happened to run into a student, but one of the studio's parties at which the instructor's presence was really a job requirement.

In the first case, a night out, ditching anyone on the dance floor is simply rude. With someone who is a student where the instructor teaches, it's stupid. But in the case of a studio where people are paying thousands of dollars for membership in that "club," you bet your sweet little petunias it is a professional matter.

Now I don't like studios that are run like clubs. I much prefer the sort of relationship with my teachers that you described, a professional partner and coach. When I dance with my teacher socially, it's because she wants to dance with me, not because she has to (and she even buys me drinks too--just thought I'd throw that in to brag about how lucky I am!). But for those who do like to go to the club-oriented studios, for whom the studio is their only outlet for dancing and the weekend parties are part of the gig, I think they can and should expect to be treated at all times with the utmost courtesy.

In a social situation, all you can do is tell someone off. But in a work situation, you can do much more. And when teachers in a work environment act like jack@$$es, I think that more is precisely what you should do.

Seen too many of these teachers--especially the men--act with that 20-something puffed-up arrogance that comes from nowhere and is supported by nothing, least of all a distinguished professional career.

My two cents again,

Genesius