Salseros - How do you handle a wild Salsera?

[danceguy]

Question for the leaders out there...as I'm getting better at Salsa (have so far to go!), I'm finally getting over my fears of asking the more advanced ladies to dance.

But I've found that some of them are way too intense in the styling department...to the point that it seems like they are dancing with themselves and I'm holding on for dear life! :shock: :oops: :shock:

Although I do enjoy fast tunes now and then and can lead some pretty good multiple turns, I'm most definitely a fan of the slow, steady and sensual lead.

Any tips for getting these gals to settle down a bit? Sometimes I feel like I'm a cowboy trying to ride a wild Mustang...with no success! :shock: :roll:

Best,

SG

[Sagitta]

In closed position: Hands low -- the lower their right and your left the less freedom they have.

[youngsta]

I just go with it. I wouldn't want someone to stifle my style so I allow them the freedom to go off...and just hang on for the ride!! :D

[tsb]

In closed position: Hands low -- the lower their right and your left the less freedom they have.

the same idea works in open position - you can rein them in (at least temporarily) by getting their hands out to the side and as low as possible - and get their palms facing down - with a little more control by gently placing your thumbs on the top of her hands.

this technique is also useful for some guiding someone who is dancing on a beat different to yours because it takes only a little bit of impetus from your left hand towards her hips to signal when you expect her to step back with her right foot.

[Sarah]

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[danceguy]

:doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops: :doh: :oops:

Swing Kitten - WHERE'S THAT RAISED EYEBROW SMILEY? :shock:

[salsachinita]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
I havn't laughed so hard in ages!!!!

[ShyDancer]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Me either SC!



Hmm I might get me one of these new models...I could sure use the support sometimes :lol: :lol:

[Ray]

heheh.. funny
:lol: :lol:

[Genesius Redux]

"...is to love her,
Simply love her,
Merely love her,
Love her,
Love her!"

--Arthur, K of the B

[tsb]

--Arthur, K of the B

king of the who?

i thought we were an autonomous collective.

[swinginstyle]

To those wild salseras. . . that's typically the last dance. I'd rather not have a dance be analagous to riding a bronco "hang on for the ride"

[MapleLeaf Salsero]

SG, you can never really "tame" these wild creatures but there are certain things you can do that might diminish their raging frenzy:

a) Look intensely into her eyes
b) Maintain contact with her hands/arms/body as much as possible
c) Use a "slightly" more aggressive lead than usual (not too much though).
c) Play with the music by abruptly stopping, waiting a bit and then restarting.

If none of these things help, you can always handcuff her to a chair or table nearby to prevent her from flying away. :wink:

When I feel nothing is working, I just sit back, relax and pretend I´m riding a roller coaster. I think, well at least I provided her with a good experience (even if I wasn´t part of it...).

[Sabor]

I agree with Youngsta and MapleLeaf's ending sentence.. because given she is a seasoned dancer, unless she follows comfortably and naturally with your lead that means her 'cup of tea' is something else at the moment.. if she has fun doing it this way u just are better off letting her.. after all its just social dancing and rythm preferences.. generally, i'm of the opinion that the lead is the one to adjust for the sake of the follow having her fun.. in such a case.

[bordertangoman]

Any tips for getting these gals to settle down a bit? Sometimes I feel like I'm a cowboy trying to ride a wild Mustang...with no success! :shock: :roll:
SG

a case for The Salsa Whisperer? :wink: :wink:

[Pacion]

:lol: you guys are funny. SG, I will dance with you :wink:

But I've found that some of them are way too intense in the styling department...to the point that it seems like they are dancing with themselves and I'm holding on for dear life!

Funny though that you should say that as I feel the same with some GUYS! :shock: It is like I am there as a "coat rack" rather than someone they are dancing with. :idea: Maybe I should start a thread on Wild Salseros? :wink:

:?: What do you think would happen if a wild salsera was paired with a wild salsero? :lol:

[peachexploration]

Any tips for getting these gals to settle down a bit? Sometimes I feel like I'm a cowboy trying to ride a wild Mustang...with no success! :shock: :roll:
SG

a case for The Salsa Whisperer? :wink: :wink:

Absolutely Hilarious! :bouncy:

[peachexploration]

...What do you think would happen if a wild salsera was paired with a wild salsero? :lol: :shock: Saw that once, it was not pretty. :nope:

[cocodrilo]

Slip her a mickey! :lol:

[etchuck]

Does asking the follower, "I'm still learning... could you rein it in a bit?" not work? Reminding myself again: one of the people I dance with in swing can't seem to get into beat in salsa, but I have been doing it for a while. She says, "Basic! basic!" when she gets lost so I go back to make sure she gets it.

Wild rides are for carnivals and roller coaster parks. Dancing... well...

[squirrel]

There's this girl here, in my city, who is practically a wild mustang!!! she's always slipping into her dance lots of improvisation and barely follows the lead! i mean, she doesn't just improvise when the guys is allowing her to, she's improvising WHENEVER SHE FEELS LIKE IT! the leader is spinning her once and she spins twice! she jumps around and does oll kind of crazy stuff! whenever guys want to lead her, they have to use a VERY STRONG LEAD! :)) really... and it's a pity 'cause she's such a good dancer and such a poor follower.

[Genesius Redux]

--Arthur, K of the B

king of the who?

i thought we were an autonomous collective.

You're fooling yourself--we're living in a dictatorship....

[Tasek]

:?: What do you think would happen if a wild salsera was paired with a wild salsero? :lol:

<Said in a deep booming voice>Mortal Kombat: two step onto the dancefloor... only one walks off!!!


I'll second mapleleaf on the eye-contact; keeping strong eye-contact sometimes helps.
Otherwise I usually switch modes during the dance: for a bit I'll do fast moves, preferably holding her with both hands, with a somewhat more forceful lead then normal, and then for a while i'll just relax, lead some simple moves and let the girl do her thing, just stepping in to reign her in if she's in danger of flailing into others.

I know a couple of those girls, to some i've tried hinting that maybe they should take it bit easy; you don't have to stick everything styling element you know into every single song, but sofar none of them seem to have taken the hint; some people just are that way.

And if it's real bad just consider it a good workout trying to keep up with them ;)

[borikensalsero]

Depending on the song I do as youngsta mentions or as mapleleaf says...

When the song is fast and she is as wild as a the Tazmanian Devil riding a wild pony, I sit back and go for the ride. I have no interest in taming anyone. That is her style, by all means do what you enjoy and go nuts, but this will be the last time we dance.

But if the dance is on the slower side, a deep penetrating look, not just to her eyes, but think that you are going to see her soul. Will usually work rather well...

I actually danced a too fast song that caught me by surprise last night. I went to see Wayne Gorbea and they were playing one of their slower tunes... ...we are grooving, then BANG! Off they go into, what felt like, a 5 minute descarga, I had no choice but to go off as well, except that I got tired half-way through, and the girl was still throwing herself everywhere, doing all kind of wild things, AHHHHHHHHH... I don't have the energy for that, I thought to myself, which I then cross body lad her very strong and stopped us on the dime on the 4. I stared into her eyes all the way from the 6,7 to the 4 when we stopped, as if she was my lady love. The gratification of slowing down :!: She was in utter shock and could only smile the rest of the song, grooving ever so slowly, skipping beats as if the heart needed not to beat... God, I really can't stand dancing fast tunes!

[danceguy]

Thank you for the insights everyone (no comment to Sarah :tongue:).

A few times I've become tangled in a power struggle on the dance floor and its served me no good purpose. If a lady is so wild that she tends to forget there's a partnership going on, yep that will be my last dance with her for quite a while. :?

I've danced with ladies who are heavy with styling...but you can lead them well and give them ample opportunity to show their stuff...and it can be a very enjoyable experience. :P

A few times I've managed to get someone to settle down a bit by using a stronger lead and focusing on them...but I'm certainly not out to try and stifle anyone's self expression...but both leader and follower should adjust their dancing to the level of who they are with...so there isn't a need for one to consume the other. :shock:

The same goes for a guy who uses the lady like a practice dummy...trying out every twisting, turning trick on a less skilled dancer just to show off their skills. I was dancing with a lady the other night who missed a fancy move I tried to do and she said to me "hey if you want, we can work on some other things if you'd like to try them out." I thought about it...and it just didn't seem right to me, so I said back "let's just the music inspire us to do whatever feels right."

We had a great dance...simple moves, but lots of fun. ;)

SG

[youngsta]

I don't have the energy for that, I thought to myself, which I then cross body lad her very strong and stopped us on the dime on the 4. I stared into her eyes all the way from the 6,7 to the 4 when we stopped, as if she was my lady love. The gratification of slowing down :!: She was in utter shock and could only smile the rest of the song, grooving ever so slowly, skipping beats as if the heart needed not to beat... God, I really can't stand dancing fast tunes!
Very, VERY nice! I understand 100% man :wink:

[MapleLeaf Salsero]

Actually what bothers me the most about these man-eating Tazmanian Devil types is the fact that they occupy too much floor space.

I don´t like it when she steps on everyone in a radius of 2 miles. I get mean looks from the other couples around us! They look at me as if it´s my fault :shock: (after all, I´m doing the leading, or am I? :shock: ) All of a sudden you see a circle forming around us... People just naturally want to protect themselves from the mercenaries on the dance floor...

I just know one of these days some wild salsera will ask me, "Was it as good for you as it was for me..." :wink:

[borikensalsero]

I don't have the energy for that, I thought to myself, which I then cross body lad her very strong and stopped us on the dime on the 4. I stared into her eyes all the way from the 6,7 to the 4 when we stopped, as if she was my lady love. The gratification of slowing down :!: She was in utter shock and could only smile the rest of the song, grooving ever so slowly, skipping beats as if the heart needed not to beat... God, I really can't stand dancing fast tunes!
Very, VERY nice! I understand 100% man :wink:

Yeap... It is sweet, isn't it!!! I love it...

[borikensalsero]

I just know one of these days some wild salsera will ask me, "Was it as good for you as it was for me..." :wink:

I've had that pleasure... They look at me, all smiles, say wow, we have to dance again! That was amazing! FOR WHOM? NOT ME! Were we dancing together? I think you got the wrong person.

[MapleLeaf Salsero]

I just know one of these days some wild salsera will ask me, "Was it as good for you as it was for me..." :wink:

I've had that pleasure... They look at me, all smiles, say wow, we have to dance again! That was amazing! FOR WHOM? NOT ME! Were we dancing together? I think you got the wrong person.

Yeah I know what you mean Boriken. I feel used... :( If she asks me to dance again, I´ll answer, "OK as long as you respect me in the morning." :wink: :wink:

[tsb]

To those wild salseras. . . that's typically the last dance. I'd rather not have a dance be analagous to riding a bronco "hang on for the ride"

at least one can let go and let her style & do shines to her heart's content. once you're on the horse...

[SDsalsaguy]

Actually what bothers me the most about these man-eating Tazmanian Devil types is the fact that they occupy too much floor space.

I don´t like it when she steps on everyone in a radius of 2 miles. I get mean looks from the other couples around us! They look at me as if it´s my fault :shock:
Yup, this is exactly the pet peeve I have in this regard... if it is just a matter of her choosing to dance regardless of me, fine, that's her business... but when it involves me in disrupting other couples? No thanks honey, I will not be dancing with you again until you learn some control and consideration.

[Soñador]

I have a friend, she's beginning dancing salsa... I went dancing with her once and dammit, she's dancing alone! She doesn't need a leader, she's doing everything by her-self! IT,s pretty strange, I had absolutely nothing to do... It's kinda hard and not pleasant at all dancing with someone like this! anyways... she should learn to follow one day... hope so!

[peachexploration]

I just know one of these days some wild salsera will ask me, "Was it as good for you as it was for me..." :wink:

I've had that pleasure... They look at me, all smiles, say wow, we have to dance again! That was amazing! FOR WHOM? NOT ME! Were we dancing together? I think you got the wrong person.

Yeah I know what you mean Boriken. I feel used... :( If she asks me to dance again, I´ll answer, "OK as long as you respect me in the morning." :wink: :wink:

You two are funny. :lol: :lol:

[squirrel]

:))) Some girls are just hard to tame...
I also danced with followers who just ignore the leader... it's frustrating... but I kinda force them back... with a stronger lead... what can I say... I'm a bi**c... being a woman :)))

[MapleLeaf Salsero]

I just know one of these days some wild salsera will ask me, "Was it as good for you as it was for me..." :wink:

I've had that pleasure... They look at me, all smiles, say wow, we have to dance again! That was amazing! FOR WHOM? NOT ME! Were we dancing together? I think you got the wrong person.

Yeah I know what you mean Boriken. I feel used... :( If she asks me to dance again, I´ll answer, "OK as long as you respect me in the morning." :wink: :wink:

You two are funny. :lol: :lol:

Thanks Peach! :lol: I like joking about these things. :wink: