ShyDancer
04-28-2004, 08:18 PM
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that
most people die of natural causes.
Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you
are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it.
If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy
it's replacement.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
Life is sexually transmitted.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who
is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach
that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you
for weeks.
Some people are like Slinkies . . .. not really good for anything,
but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down
the stairs.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals
dying of nothing.
Have you noticed since everyone has a cam-corder these days no one
talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and
a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the
world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it
takes a whole box to start a campfire?
And the # 1 thought for the day:
You read about all these terrorists most of them came to the USA
legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as
long as 10 -15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are
two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's
put Blockbuster in charge of immigration!!!
most people die of natural causes.
Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you
are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it.
If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy
it's replacement.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
Life is sexually transmitted.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who
is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach
that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you
for weeks.
Some people are like Slinkies . . .. not really good for anything,
but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down
the stairs.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals
dying of nothing.
Have you noticed since everyone has a cam-corder these days no one
talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and
a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the
world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it
takes a whole box to start a campfire?
And the # 1 thought for the day:
You read about all these terrorists most of them came to the USA
legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as
long as 10 -15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are
two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's
put Blockbuster in charge of immigration!!!