More dancing tips requested

[splithorizon852]

removed

[tasche]

Ok just dont turn into one of those creepy guys who I despised when I was still young and clubbing. Best way to get to dance with girls is to go with a group of girls. Find a really hot female friend ( just a friend) and then all the girls will want to dance with you as they will assume your a real catch.

[pygmalion]

First off there was this guy, who came in a little later than we did, and he came in by himself, he tried to make a few rave moves, but then left. Once I hit the dance floor, i saw him dancing with this beautiful girl, and i mean as in almost having sex dancing. About half an hour later I saw him with an even better looking girl. So I was wondering about how exactly this is accomplished.

I think you're talking about grinding here. It IS a lot like sex while dancing. Check out the "I have no idea how to dance" thread. Read through slowly, and try the moves in front of a mirror. Grinding is a no-brainer. All your naughty bits (thanks Monty Python :oops: :lol: ) must be in order, but disengage the brain, and you'll be grinding in no time.



So after about 30 minutes of endless wandering, and trying to dance i stumbled upon this girl, she kind of backed into me, and started rubbing her @$$ all over my croutch, well I didn't mind at all, however after about 10 minutes of doing that, we got pretty bored and she left, leaving me high and dry. She also had an X on her hand which indicated that she was under 21, and so I assume she wasn't an expert in it either. After a few more unsuccessfull attempts to recreate this with other girls, me and my friends decided to go home.

Grinding can get very boring. It's not nearly as fun as partner dancing, unless the person you're dancing with is a close friend or a lover. Otherwise, grinding is kinda gross, and boring, to boot, I think. :?

Anyway I would like to ask you guys how would you initiate a dance with a girl, how should you approach her, and what should you do. Should I talk, or just be quiet?

Ask politely, the old fashioned way. You'd be surprised how far a "may I have this dance" goes with a girl, even a modern girl. Look like a gentleman. You'll earn lots of brownie points, before you even start dancing.

Where should I put my hands, on her?

Don't put your hands anywhere R- or X-rated, unless she gives you permission. She'll let you know. Just pay attention to her signals. She'll probably let you know with nonverbal cues.

Oh by the way, I also took some dancing classes a while ago, I think I was doing salsa, swing, and cha cha. However I don't really remember anything of it, and I am pretty sure even if I rememmbered any of these moves I wouldn't be able to bust them out in a club anyway.

Not true, my friend. Salsa, swing and cha cha are all great club dances. What you need, I think, is to learn how to hear those dances, so you know when to dance them. I'll try to find some older threads that help you identify dances by listening to music.

Sorry for grammar as well, English is not my native language, and you know how American education is.
Thanks in advance.

Your English is SO excellent. Your points came across perfectly. :D

[splithorizon852]

Just to clarify, I am not looking to become one of those "creepy guys" that are in the clubs. its just that I have a number of lady friends, that i like and I was thinking of inviting them to come with us, however I soon realized that I have no idea how to dance. And so... that was the end of that.

As for grinding. yes I read that thread, its just that it seems kind of weird to just come up to a lady out of nowhere, put my right foot between her feet, and start grinding. I mean I don't even know her name. You know what I am talking about? Apperantly that guy didn't have a thought like this one.

Also tasche, that wasn't really the way that I was planning to accomplish my goal.

Btw a lot of you guys are from Florida, do you all hang toghether? I just moved up from Florida to North Virginia about a year ago. I lived around North Miami Beach area, in a small town called Hollywood. Rings a bell for anyone?

[pygmalion]

Excellent! :D You sound like a real nice guy to me. 8) A rare thing, indeed. :? The creepy guys in clubs abound. :evil:

I'm not sure what dance styles you're interested in, but, with your background, I'd try to find some group salsa, swing or Latin classes. Group classes are relatively inexpensive, but you'll get to ******* your skills, and you'll meet even more people you can go out dancing with. You'd be surprised how much you remember from your old dance classes, I bet.

All three of those dances can be used in pop dance clubs or in specialty, catering-to-dancers-only, clubs. And you have an advantage, since you've already taken classes in the past.

Does that sound appealing, or would you rather do something completely different? (Sorry, I'm thinking Monty Python today. 25th anniversary of The Life of Brian. :oops: :lol: )

[pygmalion]

Sorry. I missed the Florida reference. I have a bunch of friends from Hollywood. 8) How's the North VA/DC scene?

[splithorizon852]

Well, my mom was taking dancing lessons, and although I know that sooner or later I have to learn how to dance well, I don't think that right now would be the perfect time.

Plus during some of my visits to public classes back in Florida, most of the people were kind of old. Or in any case out of my age category.
I was hoping if you guys know maybe of some tutorials online. I am not really too keen on spending months to learn how to dance, because around then i might start taking classes. I just want like a quick how to on how to not make yourself look like a dumbass when you go to clubs.

[pygmalion]

A lot of salsa clubs and swing venues have a freebie dance lesson before the general dancing starts. That way, you won't have to feel stupid because you'll be dancing with other newbies. Afterward, a lot of the newbies usually hang around for at least a part of the dance.

Check out dcdancenet (just google it :D ) It has listing of dance venues all over the DC, MD, and VA area. Lots of information, and I bet there's something near you. :wink: :D

[splithorizon852]

Cool, thanks I ll check it out.
I ll also post an update on how tomorrow night goes.
Thanks again'

[pygmalion]

BTW. I'm not trying to be difficult. I'm sure others will recommend good videos or web sites for you. I just don't learn well that way, at least not at first. I need to dance with other human beings, to get it. :wink: 8)

[pygmalion]

Plus during some of my visits to public classes back in Florida, most of the people were kind of old. Or in any case out of my age category.


A common problem. Old codgers. :shock: :lol: Have you checked the local community colleges or universities? A lot of them have group classes full of people close to your age.

[splithorizon852]

One more thing, before i leave.
I understand that grind is when you are facing each other with legs in between each others. What about when she has her back to your front, and she is shakin' it.

How would you transition from that second posision i described into something else. I mean you can't tell her to turn around or you can't say something like, "hey, i am getting bored lets do something else", you know what i mean?

[Sagitta]

Firstly, welcome to df!! Next, grinding can be her back to your front, your back to her front, and your front to her front. Next are you going to learn dancing or to hook up with hot chicks? Why does it matter if there are old people at the classes you go? Look at it this way. If the young ones aren't there they can't see you fumbling around, so when you go out dancing with them they are impressed. I would recommend partner dancing group classes fro teh following reason. You ask how can you let your partner know that you want to transition and transition from oen position/move to another. If there is one thing you should take from partner dancing classes it is lead-follow technique. How to communicate with your dance partner when dancing.

[youngsta]

Hmmm, there are so many things I could say in this thread but my knowledge can NOT be used for evil! :twisted:

[Throwaway Overshare]

One more thing, before i leave.
I understand that grind is when you are facing each other with legs in between each others. What about when she has her back to your front, and she is shakin' it.

Sounds like the "shadow grind"

I think it's bronze FADS, not sure about the others

You can usually get out of it with an underarm turn, but if she's had too much to drink it can be more complicated

[tasche]

splithorizon852,

I hope you realise I was being very tounge and cheek butyour question basically came across as "how can I grind up against girls"

[squirrel]

Hmmm... I'm only 10 years older than you, splithorizon852, and have no responsibilities such as husband/fiancee/child(ren), meaning I can do anything I like without being judged very bad (depending on what it is that I do, of course)... let's see how I can put it:
0. I'm not a prejudiced person.
1. When I was around your age, I more or less liked grinding... but only with guys I knew or really felt attracted to... others could go to heck if you know what I mean...
2. Now I'm older (and not much wiser, I'm afraid) and have been into Salsa dancing for 3 years now... still, my opinion hasn't changed a bit! I grind only with close friends - close friend is someone you know and trust, not necessarily someone you are sleeping with or intend to do so... and with my boyfriend... guys I don't know are not allowed close to me - not even in a club!... I personally think (and btw, most of my female friends think the same) that a guy drooling on me is pathetic (and most of the time disgusting too)... females are impressed by guys how can keep it in their pants, you know... not by those who jump on them any chance they get!
I know you're young (and this sounds a little bit maternal) and you're supposed to think like that, but...
Sorry if I sounded too... prejudiced, but this is what I think...

[pygmalion]

Hmmm, there are so many things I could say in this thread but my knowledge can NOT be used for evil! :twisted: :lol: :lol:

[pygmalion]

splithorizon852,

I hope you realise I was being very tounge and cheek butyour question basically came across as "how can I grind up against girls"

Don't worry. We know you're a good, well-intentioned guy who just wants to go do the popular dances in the club.

As you can see, there are a lot of anti-grinding ladies, especially with strangers. Just keep that in mind when you go out clubbing. You might get rejected, if you ask strangers to grind, and it might not be personal at all. It might be grinding that the girl is rejecting, not you. It's always nice to have a backup plan for your dancing, in case the grinding thing doesn't work out.. :wink:

[splithorizon852]

Yea, heh, well I think I should clarify a few things. First off I know how you guys see dumbasses like myself, who come to the forum and ask the same question over and over again. I am one of the senior members of a computer security related forum, and I can tell you that almost every day we have a bunch of 13 year olds coming and asking us to teach them how to hack so they can go around breaking computers. And we keep telling them the same thing that it's not something you can just learn over night it takes practise and commitment, I guess dancing is pretty much the same way, and now that I think about it, the same thing goes for everything you want to do well in life. You can't pick it up that quick, and because people might be learning it for the wrong reasons they will not get the groove of dancing, like most people who do it to enjoy it get.

I don't just want to get quick feel from a girl while grinding, i just that think that dancing is something I will have to learn to do sooner or later, and it better be now. Also a few guys really impressed me in the club last week, and i was just wondering how you would go about learning something like that.

Also youngsta any comments you want to make would be also appropriate. Also about rejection, yea I know I already got rejected a bunch of times last saturday, and it was straight, I didn't mind.

squirell, I understand what you mean exactly. However I didn't want to invite a few girls from my school to come with us, and then going to a club, and doing something wrong and looking like a dumbass in front of them. That is actually why I came to this forum for some advice.

I understand that classes is probably the best way for me to go right now, however I have to hold up on that for a few months.

[tasche]

Ok no we've established your itentions are pure ( I've been felt up so many times at clubs by soem amny guys without even a hello that I'm snappy about things)

Now a few guys moves impressed you. Can you anaylze what exactly impressed you about them or was it just the easy transition into dancing with girls? bearing in mind that it all likely hood the girls they were familar already with the girls they were dancing with.

If your willing to try taking a couple of hip hop classes will probably go along way in making you look like you own the floor (or a lest a teensy segment of it) Finding out what favorite songs that girls like to dance to and learning to dance to at least some of those with probably garner you a few dance invitations. For me in the 90's one of the "songs" was hte Grease megamix. Us girlies would flock to the floor for that one. :D .
So being on the floor still while the other guys have skulked to the side is a big plus in my book

Regarding hands. For me personally I prefer just above the small of the bac. But my best advice is to try and dance with a bunch of girls first and wait for a solo invitation as you dont want to get yourself into any trouble

Take care

Tash

[splithorizon852]

Damn, what a great night. I just got back and its about 2:30 am. We went to a club a little later than we expected. And most of my loosen up juice worn off by the time we got there. However my friend hooked me up with rum and coke, and I was all set a few minutes later. Turns out it was electronica night tonight. And after the alcohol kicked in, the party started, music was loud, and i was kicking it. I even danced with some girls, I didn't get to the dance moves I wanted to try out, but I did dance with them, and they didn't like move away.
It was tight.
Thanks for all your help

[pygmalion]

Excellent! Glad you had fun. :D

(Um. Did you know that, in my circles, "kickin it" means having sex? :shock: :lol: )

I assume you meant dancing. LOL.

[Sagitta]

I'll second that. Glad that you had a great time.

Can you tell me how you dance with alcohol inside you? I can't do any partner dancing when I've even had a drop, and I think I have a pretty good tolerance, otherwise! What's your trick? Pray do tell!! :wink:

[squirrel]

well, I'm always glad to hear people have a great time when going out! Keep it up!