Specific Goal for Private Lessons?

[Cheery]

Must one have a specific goal when taking Private Lessons?

They are expensive, and I am just dancing for fun and to build confidence, have no desire to compete, have no dance partner, and do not really dance outside of my privates.

I have been dancing for just 5 1/2 months with a private teacher. I started out in a studio focusing on beginners, did an intro styles package, found the instructor too technical, talked too much and danced too little, so transferred school and found new private teacher.

At the start, I did one group class at that first school and found it extremely boring as the men did not know what they were doing. One man was particularly rude, correcting me harshly. He was pretty lousy, too!

For that reason, I left that school and got turned off with group lessons, waste of time, I thought, to partner with men who I thought would make me "unlearn" what I paid for in my privates.

At the new school, my private instructor was much better in that he went straight into dancing and really focuses on teaching you as much as possible in the lessons. Not much time is spent talking, it is mostly dancing.

Five and a half months down the line, I find that I am paying for eight lessons a month (now that I have the time I figure why not, till I start my new job) and it was his idea that I dance for the bronze medal test which is a couple of months away.

When I started with him he asked what my goals are and I said it is just to dance for fun. Perhaps to structure the lessons somewhat and make me more interested, and to chart my progress, he suggested dancing for the medal.

I was intimidated by this at first but now I see what it's simply a way of categorizing one's level. Well and good.

Now going back to my privates, I still do not have a specific goal and sometimes I wonder what about it fascinates me so much (Latin Ballroom).
I love the grace and technique, the exuberance of the music and the "Latino Fire" within that makes the dance look good.

However outside of the privates I have no real opportunity to dance with anyone anywhere and I just practice by myself at home. I'm too intimidated to go to a social and wondered, what happens to all the women who take private classes who are like me? Do we really have to have a goal?

I totally enjoy my lessons and love what i am learning and the physical confidence I am gaining. Are there many out there like me, or do most people out there taking privates have goals toward competing?

[Gorme]

what happens to all the women who take private classes who are like me? Do we really have to have a goal?

Over time, your teacher will convince you that doing the studio showcases or Pro/Am competition will be a good idea.

[latingal]

However outside of the privates I have no real opportunity to dance with anyone anywhere and I just practice by myself at home. I'm too intimidated to go to a social and wondered, what happens to all the women who take private classes who are like me? Do we really have to have a goal?

I totally enjoy my lessons and love what i am learning and the physical confidence I am gaining. Are there many out there like me, or do most people out there taking privates have goals toward competing?

Welcome to DF Cheery!

Well in the US (not so much in the Australia as we've been told by our Aussie contingent), pro-am - where an amateur dancer is partnered with his/her teacher - is very big. I would venture to guess that most compete, but like you some do not.

Perhaps you already have a goal, but just have not set it firmly. It sounds like you want to enjoy the process and challenge of learning to dance. To be the best dancer you can be?

[DL]

(I'm a leader.)

You asked a lot of different things.

Social dance experiences are a topic all their own. You can have great ones, awful ones, and everything in between. It seems not uncommon for early experiences to include some disappointments; but sticking it out through those can often turn out to be worthwhile.

I think many might agree that it's easier to have fun at social dances, group classes, and competitions, and even to find a suitable amateur partner, if you build up some relationships in the dance community -- but if that's your goal, you have to get out there and participate, first.

All of that is IMO quite apart from the question of, "Should one have a goal for a private lesson?". For me personally, the no-brainer answer is, "yes." My advice is to have a clear sense of what you want (in exchange for your time and your money!), but also to have a healthy willingness to adjust your focus as you become aware of different possibilities over time.

[Cheery]

Over time, your teacher will convince you that doing the studio showcases or Pro/Am competition will be a good idea.

You mean some of those people were "convinced" by their teacher? I wondered why they compete, but now it's becoming a bit clear that people do more challenging things as they learn, perhaps they started out like me not even wanting to compete.

[Cheery]

(I'm a leader.)

I think many might agree that it's easier to have fun at social dances, group classes, and competitions, and even to find a suitable amateur partner, if you build up some relationships in the dance community -- but if that's your goal, you have to get out there and participate, first.

Yes I realize that there is no way I will find a partner to dance with if I don't get out there! It's just a bit unnerving imagining what a social would look like, people sitting around waiting to be asked?! Ulk. I wish they called them "practice dances" instead of "socials," it would be less intimidating, more casual...

I think I am "losing the plot" a bit by taking private lessons and having no one else to dance with, other than my instructor.

I tried going to group dance classes of the same level but some of the men were just "out of it" and I got more confused. On the other hand, a couple of them were more advanced than me and I even stepped on their feet (this was a few months ago though, and my teacher says I have improved!).

I just told myself that if I don't go to group lessons, then all I'll know is how to dance with a guy who is of the level of my teacher, and I won't learn how to follow other leads.

However my teacher told me not to go to the group lessons because "we're already covering that in the private lessons."

What do you make of this?

What would be ideal is if I found a guy who has similar goals and is looking for a partner to dance with also, we could even split the fee for the private lessons. (How can I find one, help!)

All of that is IMO quite apart from the question of, "Should one have a goal for a private lesson?". For me personally, the no-brainer answer is, "yes." My advice is to have a clear sense of what you want (in exchange for your time and your money!), but also to have a healthy willingness to adjust your focus as you become aware of different possibilities over time.

I suppose what I want in exchange for my time and money is to become a confident and assured dancer who looks good on the floor and whom other can even admire (?) for my dancing.

THis is totally out of my usual activity, and dancing has built my physical confidence tremendously. Sometimes during my lesson I look in the mirror and can't even believe that is me, doing those things!

[Cheery]

(Sorry, I have posted this again because it came out in italics as part of the quote I was quoting!)

Yes I realize that there is no way I will find a partner to dance with if I don't get out there! It's just a bit unnerving imagining what a social would look like, people sitting around waiting to be asked?! Ulk. I wish they called them "practice dances" instead of "socials," it would be less intimidating, more casual...

I think I am "losing the plot" a bit by taking private lessons and having no one else to dance with, other than my instructor.

I tried going to group dance classes of the same level but some of the men were just "out of it" and I got more confused. On the other hand, a couple of them were more advanced than me and I even stepped on their feet (this was a few months ago though, and my teacher says I have improved!).

I just told myself that if I don't go to group lessons, then all I'll know is how to dance with a guy who is of the level of my teacher, and I won't learn how to follow other leads.

However my teacher told me not to go to the group lessons because "we're already covering that in the private lessons."

What do you make of this?

What would be ideal is if I found a guy who has similar goals and is looking for a partner to dance with also, we could even split the fee for the private lessons. (How can I find one, help!)

[DL]

Yes I realize that there is no way I will find a partner to dance with if I don't get out there! It's just a bit unnerving imagining what a social would look like, people sitting around waiting to be asked?! Ulk. I wish they called them "practice dances" instead of "socials," it would be less intimidating, more casual...


A lot has been said on that subject on DF. Have you seen any of those threads?

At any rate, you know, if you go to them thinking of them as practice dances, guess what -- ta-da, they're practice dances!


I think I am "losing the plot" a bit by taking private lessons and having no one else to dance with, other than my instructor.

I tried going to group dance classes of the same level but some of the men were just "out of it" and I got more confused. On the other hand, a couple of them were more advanced than me and I even stepped on their feet (this was a few months ago though, and my teacher says I have improved!).

I just told myself that if I don't go to group lessons, then all I'll know is how to dance with a guy who is of the level of my teacher, and I won't learn how to follow other leads.


That all seems sensible to me. Over time dancing with more and less experienced partners in group classes may seem more manageable. As for stepping on feet: once in a while a social dance partner or classmate apologies for stepping on my feet; I invariably tell her not to worry because (probably like most guys) I've stepped on *far* more feet than have stepped on mine.


However my teacher told me not to go to the group lessons because "we're already covering that in the private lessons."

What do you make of this?


Sure, the material is probably the same. You're probably seeing it in more detail with more personal focus in the private lesson than in the group class. Personally, I think I get more value from private lessons by combining them with group classes. It's more time on the floor, with a variety of rotating partners of different experience levels, with a teacher to answer questions. Plus, it's a way to get to know fellow dancers one might see at social dances or other dance events.

As an aside, what will the group class be like? Lots of technique? Lots of steps? Lots of Q&A? Advanced? Repetitive? Frequent rotation of partners? Lots of couples who don't rotate? My opinion: it depends on the group, sometimes more than it does on the teacher.

(So why did your teacher tell you that you didn't need the group class? It's very hard to say without seeing the whole context personally. My advice is that if you'd like to try doing both lessons and classes, do both. If a teacher seriously objects strongly to that and makes much of it, it's probably worth trying to figure out why.)


What would be ideal is if I found a guy who has similar goals and is looking for a partner to dance with also, we could even split the fee for the private lessons. (How can I find one, help!)

Much has been said on that subject on DF, as well. But for a brief answer, getting to know fellow dancers in classes and at social events probably can't hurt.

[tanya_the_dancer]

You mean some of those people were "convinced" by their teacher? I wondered why they compete, but now it's becoming a bit clear that people do more challenging things as they learn, perhaps they started out like me not even wanting to compete.

I definitely was "convinced" into competing by my teacher. I was somewhat abstractly interested in dance competitions in general, but never considered myself to be capable enough to actually do it. So I needed that initial push.

[Leonid Turetsky]

In general having some sort of a goal may give you a certain amount of enthusiasm towards dancing. Many people may lose the "drive" to improve when they haven't gotten a goal to work towards. But then again seems like you do have at least SOME goals like "gaining confidence" and "having fun" so that's good.

And I'd say going to socials/practice sessions would not be a bad idea for someone who is doing this for fun....otherwise why do ballroom dancing in particular.... Isn't one of the thrills of doing Latin/Ballroom dancing is to be able to lead/follow different partners?

[Cheery]

A lot has been said on that subject on DF. Have you seen any of those threads?

Sure, the material is probably the same. You're probably seeing it in more detail with more personal focus in the private lesson than in the group class. Personally, I think I get more value from private lessons by combining them with group classes. It's more time on the floor, with a variety of rotating partners of different experience levels, with a teacher to answer questions. Plus, it's a way to get to know fellow dancers one might see at social dances or other dance events.

As an aside, what will the group class be like? Lots of technique? Lots of steps? Lots of Q&A? Advanced? Repetitive? Frequent rotation of partners? Lots of couples who don't rotate? My opinion: it depends on the group, sometimes more than it does on the teacher.

(So why did your teacher tell you that you didn't need the group class? It's very hard to say without seeing the whole context personally. My advice is that if you'd like to try doing both lessons and classes, do both. If a teacher seriously objects strongly to that and makes much of it, it's probably worth trying to figure out why.)

Much has been said on that subject on DF, as well. But for a brief answer, getting to know fellow dancers in classes and at social events probably can't hurt.

Thank you for your reply. I think you're right about getting more value from the Privates by going to Group classes also. I'm going to forget about what I did before and just try it again. Besides that was several months ago so I think I can now catch up. I am going to a group class tonight which is being taught by another teacher than my Private Instructor.

(I think I have to tell him though, don't you think?)

I have no idea why he told me not to go to the Group Class. I dunno, do you think he thinks I may go for fewer Privates if I do that? (I actually might, if it is beneficial to me to do so, why not!) Is that why? He didn't say why and I didn't ask.

(If I do tell him, when I see him later this week, I'll say it is because it does me good to follow other leads, that's valid, isn't it).

The group class I went to before was like this: All the men on one side of the room. Women on the other side. First, the instructor shows the men their steps/leads. The men then do it about two or three times.

Then the women get shown theirs steps, and just like the men, repeat the steps about three times.

Then, it's "Ok, grab a partner, let's do it together" and we form a circle. We do it with one partner about two times, then rotate. Then the music comes on and it all happens a bit faster.

Sometimes the instructor stops everyone and corrects mistakes. He also will get someone from class to demo the correct way.

This continues throughout the class time, more new steps, more routines, back in a circle, then back to two sides of the room for more steps.

I was going to a Salsa class regularly and sometimes it is so repetitious. That can be good so you get it from so many tries, at times it is boring because you don't feel like you are learning more.

One thing I do not like about my studio is that anyone can go to any class anytime. I often see some guys going to Levels 2, 3 and 4 of the same dance. I am not sure if they pay for all or if they go to lower level classes to fill spaces for the women.

Maybe they just want to practice. I imitated this practice for a time and decided to go back to a lower level for one class.

It is irritating because there is no continuity and it is so obvious that some people are too advanced or of a lower level. However, sometimes this can also be advantageous, for example, I'll get to "gate crash" a class this evening I never went to before, hoping that I'll be up to that level since I do Privates.

It was good to go to Group Classes before because I got a feel for what it is like with different guys leading. Some of the more interesting looking men were terrible dancers and the less interesting looking ones turned out to be great leads. (Hm, is this a lesson for real life? Ha ha).

[DL]

Thank you for your reply. I think you're right about getting more value from the Privates by going to Group classes also. I'm going to forget about what I did before and just try it again. Besides that was several months ago so I think I can now catch up. I am going to a group class tonight which is being taught by another teacher than my Private Instructor.

(I think I have to tell him though, don't you think?)


For me it would come up anyway because I would have a question. "I tried such and such in a group class and the result was thus and so -- what's the Right Way?"

Seeing the same thing taught by different people can be enlightening. It can sometimes also be confusing, so it's probably best to pick a particular teacher to help you resolve apparent discrepancies.


I have no idea why he told me not to go to the Group Class. I dunno, do you think he thinks I may go for fewer Privates if I do that? (I actually might, if it is beneficial to me to do so, why not!) Is that why? He didn't say why and I didn't ask.

(If I do tell him, when I see him later this week, I'll say it is because it does me good to follow other leads, that's valid, isn't it).
Personally, I don't think you need any other reason than wanting to try a group class again.

As for how many private lessons you take -- it's your time, your money, your decision. Don't spend more than you're comfortable spending, don't take more lessons than you feel are of benefit to you; but do have an open mind when you hear advice from teachers and fellow students that adjusting your private lesson schedule relative to your other dancing might have some benefit.


The group class I went to before was like this:
....
Seems straightforward enough.


I was going to a Salsa class regularly and sometimes it is so repetitious. That can be good so you get it from so many tries, at times it is boring because you don't feel like you are learning more.
You may find at different times that you like repetition, or that you like seeing lots of steps, or value other things about group classes.


One thing I do not like about my studio is that anyone can go to any class anytime. I often see some guys going to Levels 2, 3 and 4 of the same dance. I am not sure if they pay for all or if they go to lower level classes to fill spaces for the women.

Maybe they just want to practice. I imitated this practice for a time and decided to go back to a lower level for one class.

It is irritating because there is no continuity and it is so obvious that some people are too advanced or of a lower level. However, sometimes this can also be advantageous, for example, I'll get to "gate crash" a class this evening I never went to before, hoping that I'll be up to that level since I do Privates.
IMO everybody benefits when advanced students go back to work on more basic material -- the teachers, the advanced students, new students, everyone -- so long as it's clear to all that the beginner classes teach material accessible to the beginners, and the later classes will not be significantly slowed for newbies.

Group classes won't cater to you personally; that's what private lessons are for. But that doesn't mean that group classes have to be frustrating. It just means that you have to figure out for yourself how to approach them in a way that will be productive for you. Group classes and private lessons are simply two different things; hopefully if you give them time you'll start to get an idea of how to use them to complement each other.

In my experience, if you drop in on harder classes it can be helpful to have some friends there who have observed and respect your earnest efforts to practice and learn, with all the partners you encounter in classes.

[mkp]

I can identify with your disappointment with group classes. I have been dancing for three years. In the beginning, when I was much less skilled than I am now, I was happy going to group classes and learning all these new steps. I didn't mind that my partners were oftne as inept as I was! But as I have gotten better, I have had less patience for partners that were not up to my level. I have found this has also happened with my other friends who have been dancing for awhile. The more skilled you get, you want a better partner.

I have also recently found a new dance teacher who is simply fabulous. After dancing with him, no one seems good enough! So this can be an impediment to social dancing, where you have to deal with a varity of partners at different skill levels. It's amazing, but when a man is a good lead, you feel like you are a great dancer. If he isn't a good lead, you feel like you are a klutz! I am not saying women don't make mistakes, just that the man's lead is very important.

When I started out, I could never have imagined that I would want to compete. Now, social dancing just doesn't do it for me anymore. Yes, you need to have a goal for your private lessons, something to work towards. If I just wanted to social dance, I could probably stop my lessons now. I know enough to get by in most settings. But, surprisingly, I want more. It's really amazing.

Also, you will find in group classes, even at higher levels, that the skill level of the students (both men and women) will vary greatly. This is especially so at franchise studios, where students are "passed on" to higher levels after awhile, whether they are ready or not. It's also true that not everyone has the same talent or ability for dance. I go to group lessons to learn new steps that I can practice with my instructor. But at this point in my development, I could just as well learn new steps or routines from my instructor and by pass the classes altogether. It just depends on where you are in your learning process.

[davedove]

Group classes won't cater to you personally; that's what private lessons are for. But that doesn't mean that group classes have to be frustrating. It just means that you have to figure out for yourself how to approach them in a way that will be productive for you. Group classes and private lessons are simply two different things; hopefully if you give them time you'll start to get an idea of how to use them to complement each other.


That's what I've found. Group classes are good for learning a step and practicing it with different people. However, in group classes, the instructor just doesn't have the time to give individual instruction. In a private, since more attention is on you, more can be covered, but you don't get the experience with different people, which is good for working on lead/follow skills.

[Cheery]

I have also recently found a new dance teacher who is simply fabulous. After dancing with him, no one seems good enough! So this can be an impediment to social dancing, where you have to deal with a varity of partners at different skill levels. It's amazing, but when a man is a good lead, you feel like you are a great dancer. If he isn't a good lead, you feel like you are a klutz! I am not saying women don't make mistakes, just that the man's lead is very important.

When I started out, I could never have imagined that I would want to compete. Now, social dancing just doesn't do it for me anymore. Yes, you need to have a goal for your private lessons, something to work towards. If I just wanted to social dance, I could probably stop my lessons now. I know enough to get by in most settings. But, surprisingly, I want more. It's really amazing.



So do you think it is bad to dance only with your Private Teacher? I have only been dancing under six months and he is the only one I dance with. So you can imagine, that is I am always disappointed with Group Lessons.

I also experienced what you said, that when a man is a good lead you really do dance much better, and when he is a lousy lead, you look worse! ?As I sat and chatted with one of the men after a group class, I told him that I could follow the routines with some men (him included) and with others, I could not. He said, "Bad lead?" I said, "Yeah, blame the guy!"

(However i have read in another post that men who are good leads, when dancing with good followers, also look better, and when dancing with lousy followers, look worse too in their dancing!)

I was struck by what you said that when you started out you had no desire to compete, and that now, social dancing just doesn't cut it for you anymore.

I had no desire to compete at all either and have not even social danced at all, however, I am a person of very high standards in whatever I do. I am only a beginner but I come from a culture where dancing is very prevalent and natural to the people, so I am used to seeing good dancing. While I am only new to this, I would like to see myself reach a level which I myself would admire in others.

Also for me, dancing is kind of a breakthrough to build physical confidence and ease and acceptance of my body (something I never did my entire life).
So while I am doing it for fun I also want to do it because it is not easy and there is constantly something new to learn.

I haven't even gotten so far in Salsa (Level 3) but I am getting bored with it already. It seems like a lot of turning and corny moves, compared to Latin Ballroom (Int'l) which I am learning in my Privates.

I am constantly challenged by what my teacher shows me to do, and when I succeed in doing it I feel great. I don't even feel that from Salsa (however my Salsa is only Group Lessons, it is too easy I think for Privates) (Sorry fo the Salsa bashing here, it is definitely a fun dance but I feel that Latin Int'l Ballroom has so much more technique to learn which is why it is great).

So here's my question for you, do you think I will reach that point that I will also want to compete, in order to progress?! Yikes, I never thought of that. Whew, thank God I am only six months into this! That seems a long way off still. :raisebro:

[Cheery]

r.

I have also recently found a new dance teacher who is simply fabulous. After dancing with him, no one seems good enough!

May I ask how your Private Lessons with him are taught?

Mine go like this:

We meet 2x weekly, and he teaches me either Cha Cha, Rumba, or Samba. (Starting Jive soon). Like I said, we have been dancing six months together.
He wants me to go for the medal test in a couple of months.

During class, he shows me new steps and we practice them together the entire time. I also ask tons of questions and many times he makes me do exercises like rumba walks, turns, etc. (I suppose this is like doing scales, when you learn a musical instrument?)

As of now we have reached a point where he says I know the routines for Bronze (and some, Silver) in the three mentioned dances.

So he is starting to show me some styling now.

Here are other questions I have for you:

-Is it a bit awkward for a male instructor to show you female styling? Do you need a female Private Teacher perhaps for a separate lesson for this?
I ask this because in my previous school (where I bought an intro package of six lessons), my Private Teacher said that a female would teach me styling eventually.

-Does your Private Instructor have a written record of whatever you have covered in lessons? Coz mine doesn't. In fact he sometimes forgets what we have covered and I have to remind him.

-Do you ask your teacher what you want him to teach/show you, or do you let him decide how lessons will go?

-Does your teacher talk about the origins or deeper meanings of the dance? Mine doesn't , we just dance.

-Sometimes i also feel like he is so technical, just showing me how things are done. I think that to feel the dance, you have to be coached in other ways, (like how you should feel a certain move or whatnot--perhaps the way a director motivates an actor)--or is this reserved for more advanced students?

-Lastly, when he teaches me footwork, he does not show me arms or hips...when I ask, he says he is leaving it for later, as he wants me to know the footwork first. Now he is adding hips and arms and I can see how that works because once I insisted, (early on) and when he showed me the arms, I lost it---(messed up the feet)--so he said "trust me, I will show it to you later."

Sorry for the tons of questions, I suppose you also wondered these things when you were new! :razz:

[JustLiving08]

I also experienced what you said, that when a man is a good lead you really do dance much better, and when he is a lousy lead, you look worse! ?As I sat and chatted with one of the men after a group class, I told him that I could follow the routines with some men (him included) and with others, I could not. He said, "Bad lead?" I said, "Yeah, blame the guy!"My opinion on this matter (and a lot of my teachers also hold this opinion), if you are truly a good lead you can make anyone look good. Same goes for followers. You can't always control how good your leader or follower is, but you can control how well you dance. So yeah, if you're on different levels, adjust yourself to match or compensate for their shortcomings.

For leaders, that might mean adjusting the patterns you do, adjusting the level of your connection (heavier versus lighter lead). For followers, that might mean covering up the leader's mistakes when/if possible. So he meant to make you do a turn, but mis-lead it and you ended up doing something different, play it off and cover his mistake. Make him feel and make the dance look as though what you did was what it was suppose to be, if that makes sense.

That in my mind is what it means to be a good follower or leader. One of my teachers can make ANYONE look good. He can take someone who has never danced and make them look great. Why? Because he knows how to adjust his lead to convey to his follower through the connection what he wants her to do and make her look as though she knows what's she doing. You looking good on the dance floor shouldn't depend solely on how good your partner is. If you only look good when dancing with certain people... that means they're good and they know what they're doing to make you look good. It's an indication of how good the leader is, not the follower. (I read that in a dance article, I wish I could remember the url...) It's a partnership and you two should balance each other out.

I mean, this is just a general kind of thing... obviously you can't make everyone look good but it's something you can strive for. I myself am a follower, and this is definitely something I'm working towards. I want to be able to follow any lead and make it work.

[JustLiving08]

I don't think some of these questions were directed to me specifically, but I'm going to tackle them anyway. =P

Is it a bit awkward for a male instructor to show you female styling? Do you need a female Private Teacher perhaps for a separate lesson for this?Depends, I think a male instructor can only show you so much. They can probably start you on styling but eventually you'll want to seek out a female instructor. Personally, I want to learn female styling from a female because well... they're a girl and so they know how to style and be feminine because that's the role in all partner dances if that makes sense. They will often have more experience in that area. I also feel more comfortable (and this is my opinion) learning how to do some of the sexy moves from a female than a guy. (E.g. body isolations, body rolls, etc.)

Does your Private Instructor have a written record of whatever you have covered in lessons? Coz mine doesn't. In fact he sometimes forgets what we have covered and I have to remind him.For the most part, my teachers remember, every now and then I'll have to remind them. It's also not a bad idea to write things down (or even video tape if they allow it), not for them so much as for you.

Do you ask your teacher what you want him to teach/show you, or do you let him decide how lessons will go?I do both. If there's something in particular I want to work on, I'll ask them otherwise I let them guide the lesson.

Does your teacher talk about the origins or deeper meanings of the dance? Mine doesn't , we just dance.For the most part no... unless I ask.

Sometimes i also feel like he is so technical, just showing me how things are done. I think that to feel the dance, you have to be coached in other ways, (like how you should feel a certain move or whatnot--perhaps the way a director motivates an actor)--or is this reserved for more advanced students?I think this will vary depending on your teacher's teaching style. I have teachers who are technical, but also use other ways to show me what they mean. E.g. Telling me which muscles I'm suppose to be feeling, which muscles are suppose to be moving, etc. If you're teacher is too technical, ask them to break it down to you in other ways. A good teacher should be able to do both.


Lastly, when he teaches me footwork, he does not show me arms or hips...when I ask, he says he is leaving it for later, as he wants me to know the footwork first. Now he is adding hips and arms and I can see how that works because once I insisted, (early on) and when he showed me the arms, I lost it---(messed up the feet)--so he said "trust me, I will show it to you later.I think this also relates to above on your teacher's teaching style, and it might also relate to his assessment of you. If he thinks you can do it all right off the bat, that's the way he'll present it to you. If he feels like you need to have it broken down, then that will be the approach he takes. I think if you're a beginner, it might be easier to teach you footwork first and then add styling. It's like building a house, you need to lay the foundation first. Especially since if you get the footwork first and practice it enough so that it's muscle memory, it's easier to work on other components without having your footwork fall apart.

[JustLiving08]

what happens to all the women who take private classes who are like me? Do we really have to have a goal?

I've been dancing on and off for over 2 years now. (mostly off... ) I will say this, it really helps to have a tangible goal, whether that be competition or showcasing. That's my main dilemna as well. Like you, most of my dancing comes from private lessons. I've poured a lot of money into these lessons, because let's face it, they're really expensive! I don't have a specific goal in mind. I refuse to compete or showcase (at this time). My main drive is that I've always wanted to dance and I want to get damn good at it. Which is a really broad goal, and probably why I keep starting and stopping.

Ideally, I would love to be able to get to the level I want by only taking private lessons and practicing on my own. The reality is, the progress will be painstakingly slow going that route. Not to mention with partner dancing, there's only so far you can get by practicing by yourself. Since I really only want to dance for fun (and for my own personal goals/reasons), the other option is social dancing. I have my own issues with social dancing (I made a post about it, and believe it's still on the first page). It's not easy trust me, but for myself... it's the only way I can see myself advancing to the level I want to be at. It's the only way I can reach the goals I want with partner dancing (one of which is the ability to follow any leader).

So I guess yes and no... it seems like you do have your goals but maybe you want one that's more tangible. Really though, only you can set it. Maybe start out small, like by such and such time I would like to have turns and spins down or something.

[Gorme]

So do you think it is bad to dance only with your Private Teacher?

It depends on what you want out of your dancing. If you only want to dance when your instructor is present, then it's okay. If you plan to dance with other Amateur men who will definitely be less skilled than your instructor, then you have to expand your following skills to decipher leads that are not always clear or present.

I always wondered why any woman would want to dance with an Amateur man due to the reason that you stated. My partners tell me that they feel more comfortable and less pressured practicing with someone around their abilities rather than feeling nervous for not doing everything the teacher asks of them.


So here's my question for you, do you think I will reach that point that I will also want to compete, in order to progress?!

I feel that there should be a category for people who want to seriously improve their dancing, but not have to go out on the competition floor with others. It's difficult to find someone who thinks in that mindset. So at a certain point in your learning, you start to yearn for more information on very minute details. You have reached competitive training, without actually doing the competition. However, your instructor will convince you to do competition because he has an opportunity to showcase you to others.

[wooh]

I always wondered why any woman would want to dance with an Amateur man due to the reason that you stated. My partners tell me that they feel more comfortable and less pressured practicing with someone around their abilities rather than feeling nervous for not doing everything the teacher asks of them.




For me it's not that I don't want to feel pressured, it's that I want a true partnership. I want to create something greater than the sum of it's parts with my partner. I want 1+1 to equal 3. Not 1 (me) + 3 (pro) equalling 2. I want to enhance my partner's dancing, and he to enhance mine. Can *I* dance better with a super good pro than with my partner? Yes. But it's too "me" for my tastes. I still feel like he's carrying me, even if I'm dancing great, I know there's no way that he can dance his absolute best with me. Dancing with my partner, we can both dance our best if we work together. We're BOTH compensating for the other's faults. We're both building on each other's strengths.
I can understand the allure of concentrating on your own dancing. I have to say my dancing improved very quickly working on showcase dance with my instructor. But I absolutely HATED it. I wanted my partner back. In part, because hours of focusing on just my own inadequacy sucks. But mostly just because I missed the feeling of working together instead of feeling like I was out there all alone in practice and performing.
Of course, take all this with a grain of salt. Maybe I'd feel different if my partner wasn't also my best friend and husband. Maybe with someone else, "us against the world" wouldn't be so much more attractive than "me against the world."

[tanya_the_dancer]

For me it's not that I don't want to feel pressured, it's that I want a true partnership. I want to create something greater than the sum of it's parts with my partner. I want 1+1 to equal 3. Not 1 (me) + 3 (pro) equalling 2. I want to enhance my partner's dancing, and he to enhance mine. Can *I* dance better with a super good pro than with my partner? Yes. But it's too "me" for my tastes. I still feel like he's carrying me, even if I'm dancing great, I know there's no way that he can dance his absolute best with me. Dancing with my partner, we can both dance our best if we work together. We're BOTH compensating for the other's faults. We're both building on each other's strengths.
I can understand the allure of concentrating on your own dancing. I have to say my dancing improved very quickly working on showcase dance with my instructor. But I absolutely HATED it. I wanted my partner back. In part, because hours of focusing on just my own inadequacy sucks. But mostly just because I missed the feeling of working together instead of feeling like I was out there all alone in practice and performing.
Of course, take all this with a grain of salt. Maybe I'd feel different if my partner wasn't also my best friend and husband. Maybe with someone else, "us against the world" wouldn't be so much more attractive than "me against the world."

I think it depends on a person. I don't feel nervous about not doing what's asked of me, I would be in deep trouble if I couldn't get over it. Nor I have an issue with being the less experienced half of the couple, or focusing on the flaws in my own dancing during my lessons. Although, I have to say that I do not feel like I am all alone when I compete or perform. My teacher always tells me to mentally treat it as a team effort between the two of us, and I think it sank in.

[mkp]

May I ask how your Private Lessons with him are taught?

Mine go like this:

We meet 2x weekly, and he teaches me either Cha Cha, Rumba, or Samba. (Starting Jive soon). Like I said, we have been dancing six months together.
He wants me to go for the medal test in a couple of months.

I only take lessons once a week with my private instructor. What you are doing in your private lessons sounds a lot like what I am doing in mine.


-Is it a bit awkward for a male instructor to show you female styling? Do you need a female Private Teacher perhaps for a separate lesson for this?
I ask this because in my previous school (where I bought an intro package of six lessons), my Private Teacher said that a female would teach me styling eventually.

I have recently started taking private lessons with a female instructor. I highly recommend this at some point in your dancing education. The female instructor is more attuned, in my opinion, in styling and other technical stuff that make the women look good on the dance floor.

-Does your Private Instructor have a written record of whatever you have covered in lessons? Coz mine doesn't. In fact he sometimes forgets what we have covered and I have to remind him.

At my franchise studio they require the instructors to write down what they covered with you in the lesson, and then you initial it. In fact, each student has a booklet with all the lesson information in it since you started at the school.

Now, with my newest instructor (the fabulous one!) he doesn't write anything down. No notes. But my goodness, he remembers everything we have done before and seems to know where we are going next. He is amazing.

I would suggest you start taking your own notes about what is covered in each lesson so you can show it to your instructor.

-Do you ask your teacher what you want him to teach/show you, or do you let him decide how lessons will go?

Both. You have to have an idea of what you want in each lesson or what dances/moves you'd like to work on. Your teacher will also have ideas for you as well. It goes both ways.

-Does your teacher talk about the origins or deeper meanings of the dance? Mine doesn't , we just dance.

No. None of mine do.

-Sometimes i also feel like he is so technical, just showing me how things are done. I think that to feel the dance, you have to be coached in other ways, (like how you should feel a certain move or whatnot--perhaps the way a director motivates an actor)--or is this reserved for more advanced students?

Well, this is a hard question. I my opinion, technique is very important, but so is feeling the dance and being able to express yourself through dance. My thinking is that technique is especially focused on during the early stages, and the more artistic stuff is left for later. I think probably that works best for most people.

-Lastly, when he teaches me footwork, he does not show me arms or hips...when I ask, he says he is leaving it for later, as he wants me to know the footwork first. Now he is adding hips and arms and I can see how that works because once I insisted, (early on) and when he showed me the arms, I lost it---(messed up the feet)--so he said "trust me, I will show it to you later."

I would listen to him. I personally feel that once you get the basics of the footwork you can concentrate on technique and styling. That is what my instructors do too.

Sorry for the tons of questions, I suppose you also wondered these things when you were new! :razz:

Not a problem! Hope my answers were helpful.

[Terpsichorean Clod]

I have also recently found a new dance teacher who is simply fabulous. After dancing with him, no one seems good enough!
You might considering reading this thread. ;)
Spoiled rotten: when his lead was too good! (http://www.danceforums.com/showthread.php?t=8352)
So this can be an impediment to social dancing, where you have to deal with a varity of partners at different skill levels. It's amazing, but when a man is a good lead, you feel like you are a great dancer. If he isn't a good lead, you feel like you are a klutz! I am not saying women don't make mistakes, just that the man's lead is very important.
I think a good follower can have a similar effect on a less experienced leader. :)
Also, you will find in group classes, even at higher levels, that the skill level of the students (both men and women) will vary greatly. This is especially so at franchise studios, where students are "passed on" to higher levels after awhile, whether they are ready or not.
I think it would be more likely at independent studios where there is often no mechanism to place students into class levels. Students go wherever they want. I've only encountered one teacher who actually told off students who didn't belong in her class.

Welcome to Dance Forums, mkp. :)

[waltzguy]

It's amazing, but when a man is a good lead, you feel like you are a great dancer. If he isn't a good lead, you feel like you are a klutz! I am not saying women don't make mistakes, just that the man's lead is very important.


This is very true. However, as others have said already, the opposite is true too, especially in International Standard.

In this thread, there seems to be a lead-follow theme. The way I like to see it is:

The man: Leads and follows
The lady: Follows and leads

True esp. in Standard.

[waltzguy]

For me it's not that I don't want to feel pressured, it's that I want a true partnership. I want to create something greater than the sum of it's parts with my partner. I want 1+1 to equal 3. Not 1 (me) + 3 (pro) equalling 2. I want to enhance my partner's dancing, and he to enhance mine. Can *I* dance better with a super good pro than with my partner? Yes. But it's too "me" for my tastes. I still feel like he's carrying me, even if I'm dancing great, I know there's no way that he can dance his absolute best with me. Dancing with my partner, we can both dance our best if we work together. We're BOTH compensating for the other's faults. We're both building on each other's strengths.
I can understand the allure of concentrating on your own dancing. I have to say my dancing improved very quickly working on showcase dance with my instructor. But I absolutely HATED it. I wanted my partner back. In part, because hours of focusing on just my own inadequacy sucks. But mostly just because I missed the feeling of working together instead of feeling like I was out there all alone in practice and performing.
Of course, take all this with a grain of salt. Maybe I'd feel different if my partner wasn't also my best friend and husband. Maybe with someone else, "us against the world" wouldn't be so much more attractive than "me against the world."

Wow! This is my sentiments exactly. Same reason I have amateur DP. Reading this was amazing. :applause:

[Terpsichorean Clod]

Must one have a specific goal when taking Private Lessons?
There are lots of different reasons people might have for taking private lessons:
-to improve their social dancing
-to learn some choreography for a performance
-to train for competition
-exercise
-self-improvement
-to dance with their teacher
:lol: I went in for a lesson before my last headshot because I needed to feel good! :lol:
They are expensive, and I am just dancing for fun and to build confidence, have no desire to compete, have no dance partner, and do not really dance outside of my privates.
Great! I see nothing wrong with that. I have a friend whose daughter doesn't dance outside private lessons. You're picking up lots of technique but you don't have to use it now. Maybe later on, you'll decide you want to apply it in a showcase or on the social floor. Or not at all, and that's perfectly fine, too.
Five and a half months down the line, I find that I am paying for eight lessons a month (now that I have the time I figure why not, till I start my new job) and it was his idea that I dance for the bronze medal test which is a couple of months away.

When I started with him he asked what my goals are and I said it is just to dance for fun. Perhaps to structure the lessons somewhat and make me more interested, and to chart my progress, he suggested dancing for the medal.

I was intimidated by this at first but now I see what it's simply a way of categorizing one's level. Well and good.
I think that's a great idea! I would add that it's up to you what you get out of the medal exam. Bronze isn't really a level, but rather just a collection of steps. The medal exam sets an arbitrary standard. Beyond that, there's a vast range of how you can dance those "bronze" steps up to how the pros do them. And I think you'll find a lot of benefits to continually working towards doing those bronze steps like the pros.
I totally enjoy my lessons and love what i am learning and the physical confidence I am gaining. Are there many out there like me, or do most people out there taking privates have goals toward competing?
Good for you! It doesn't sound like you need to change anything.

In ballroom, I would say most. But I do know a lot of people who take privates without any intention of ever competing.

[Cheery]

Sorry, my replies did not come out the way I wanted...how do you reply to a quote in breaks, like you did? Here goes,....again...

There are lots of different reasons people might have for taking private lessons:
-to improve their social dancing
-to learn some choreography for a performance
-to train for competition
-exercise
-self-improvement
-to dance with their teacherThe first three now apply to me, and hopefully in the near future the other will, as well.
I think that's a great idea! I would add that it's up to you what you get out of the medal exam. Bronze isn't really a level, but rather just a collection of steps. The medal exam sets an arbitrary standard. Beyond that, there's a vast range of how you can dance those "bronze" steps up to how the pros do them. And I think you'll find a lot of benefits to continually working towards doing those bronze steps like the pros.I never even knew that "bronze" is a collection of steps until I saw my instructor do it with his other students. I realize now that even if I know the steps it is up to me how to interpret and style the dancing because all of his students do the steps differently. I will post a new threat about "grading" or "evaluation" as I have questions about that as well.
Good for you! It doesn't sound like you need to change anything.Great to hear someone thinks so :p
I am still working up the nerve to go to a social. There is one coming up at my studio but it is Ballroom Standard and Ballroom Latin and I don't do the first one, so what would I do, sit it out? That doesn't sound good...
In ballroom, I would say most. But I do know a lot of people who take privates without any intention of ever competing.
Okay so now if I can only find a guy who is like that, then we can dance together. How do I find one, hmmmmm....

[Terpsichorean Clod]

The group class I went to before was like this: All the men on one side of the room. Women on the other side. First, the instructor shows the men their steps/leads. The men then do it about two or three times.

Then the women get shown theirs steps, and just like the men, repeat the steps about three times.

Then, it's "Ok, grab a partner, let's do it together" and we form a circle. We do it with one partner about two times, then rotate. Then the music comes on and it all happens a bit faster.

Sometimes the instructor stops everyone and corrects mistakes. He also will get someone from class to demo the correct way.

This continues throughout the class time, more new steps, more routines, back in a circle, then back to two sides of the room for more steps.
I've taken some classes with an instructor who would explain how the movements of leader and follower affected each other. "Leaders, you're going to do X which will result in the follower doing Y. Be careful not to do Z which will send the follower thataway. Followers, can you feel this? This is what makes you go here, but wait until you feel it. The instructor would walk the class slowly through the figure/sequence, watching to make sure everyone was actually leading and following.
-Does your Private Instructor have a written record of whatever you have covered in lessons? Coz mine doesn't. In fact he sometimes forgets what we have covered and I have to remind him.
Hmmm, when I first started taking lessons with each of my instructors, I would remind them what I had been learning in the previous lesson. They had plenty of other students, so I didn't expect them to remember. Surprisingly, they did remember. Furthermore, it seemed that my instructors didn't really need to know what happened during the last lesson. About 5 seconds of watching me dance was enough to tell whether or not I had absorbed the previous material. If yes, then we would move on. If no, we would review the material. Or maybe we would go on, setting it aside for later, for the sake of my and their sanity. ;)

[wonderwoman]

Yikes. Cheery he should be jotting down what you've covered. Mine always had me sign off on what we'd covered at the end of our lessons.

[Terpsichorean Clod]

I am still working up the nerve to go to a social. There is one coming up at my studio but it is Ballroom Standard and Ballroom Latin and I don't do the first one, so what would I do, sit it out? That doesn't sound good...Yes, you can sit it out. I went to my first ballroom social knowing only basic waltz, tango, and foxtrot. Which left Viennese waltz, quickstep, cha cha, samba, rumba, bolero, swing, salsa, nightclub 2-step, west coast swing, hustle, merengue... The upside is that as a follower, you have a decent chance of being led through dances you don't know. In the future, it will help for you to take a little tiime to learn a few of the basics in those dances.
Okay so now if I can only find a guy who is like that, then we can dance together. How do I find one, hmmmmm....
Well, getting yourself out there, meeting people at socials, classes, practicing at the studio. Tell anyone, man, woman, instructor, student, regardless of age, ability, dance style, that you are looking for a partner. Tell them to let their friends and friends' friends know. I helped setup a friend with my practice buddy's significant other's ex-partner. 4 degrees of separation! :cool:

[etp777]

heh, I'm 3 years in, and I still sit out merengue, samba and hustle when I can manage it. :)

[wonderwoman]

Lots of people sit out dances they don't know. I always sat out the boleros and VWs and sambas. It's a social, so it's okay to hang out and socialize and eat munchies. ;)

[etp777]

and drink. :)

[wonderwoman]

Goes without saying ;)

[Cheery]

Yes, you can sit it out. I went to my first ballroom social knowing only basic waltz, tango, and foxtrot. Which left Viennese waltz, quickstep, cha cha, samba, rumba, bolero, swing, salsa, nightclub 2-step, west coast swing, hustle, merengue... The upside is that as a follower, you have a decent chance of being led through dances you don't know. In the future, it will help for you to take a little tiime to learn a few of the basics in those dances.Now that I've been going to Group Salsa for several weeks, some faces are becoming familiar. Probably when I feel more "comfortable" with these people, I'll have the nerve to go to a social! Well, getting yourself out there, meeting people at socials, classes, practicing at the studio. Tell anyone, man, woman, instructor, student, regardless of age, ability, dance style, that you are looking for a partner. Tell them to let their friends and friends' friends know. I helped setup a friend with my practice buddy's significant other's ex-partner. 4 degrees of separation! :cool:What a good idea. I wonder what my pro would think if I asked him to help me find a partner. What would be ideal would be a man taking a private class from a female instructor. We could then alternate privates with my pro, then his, with him being my partner. However, both his private teacher and mine will lose 50% of lessons that way, so why would they (instructors) be interested in helping me find a partner, I wonder? I'm seeing pro again for a private on Friday, will broach the topic and see what happens.

[Gorme]

What a good idea. I wonder what my pro would think if I asked him to help me find a partner. What would be ideal would be a man taking a private class from a female instructor. We could then alternate privates with my pro, then his, with him being my partner. However, both his private teacher and mine will lose 50% of lessons that way, so why would they (instructors) be interested in helping me find a partner, I wonder? I'm seeing pro again for a private on Friday, will broach the topic and see what happens.

Their interest is when you do partner up, you will take additional lessons together on top of whatever you do individually with them. Each partner's pro would prefer that they are the one who becomes the couple's primary coach. That's not necessary. It's possible that you could work with a 3rd pro as a couple and the two of you still work individually with your current pro.

The only time I can imagine a pro objecting is if their student is an active Pro/Am. The student may stop competing as a Pro/Am and do Amateur only. The pro would take a hit in income.

[Terpsichorean Clod]

Now that I've been going to Group Salsa for several weeks, some faces are becoming familiar. Probably when I feel more "comfortable" with these people, I'll have the nerve to go to a social!Sounds like a plan! :cheers:
What a good idea. I wonder what my pro would think if I asked him to help me find a partner. What would be ideal would be a man taking a private class from a female instructor. We could then alternate privates with my pro, then his, with him being my partner. However, both his private teacher and mine will lose 50% of lessons that way, so why would they (instructors) be interested in helping me find a partner, I wonder? I'm seeing pro again for a private on Friday, will broach the topic and see what happens. Even if they do lose income, they will be interested in helping you if their main concern is your welfare. I once watched a studio showcase where most of the students were clearly being carried through the performance by their pros. One lady was a breath of fresh air, dancing actively and balanced over her own feet. When I conveyed my compliments to her pro, he said it would likely be their last public dance together, as she was leaving shortly to partner an amateur. I replied with my condolences. He smiled and said he was very happy as he felt his job was to prepare his students for their own amateur partnerships.

[Cheery]

Sounds like a plan! :cheers:
Even if they do lose income, they will be interested in helping you if their main concern is your welfare. I once watched a studio showcase where most of the students were clearly being carried through the performance by their pros. One lady was a breath of fresh air, dancing actively and balanced over her own feet. When I conveyed my compliments to her pro, he said it would likely be their last public dance together, as she was leaving shortly to partner an amateur. I replied with my condolences. He smiled and said he was very happy as he felt his job was to prepare his students for their own amateur partnerships.

Ok so I guess pro's reaction when I broach the idea of helping me find an AM partner will tell whether he is after his income from me, or my welfare! I really have no idea how many men take privates at the studio from women, as I never see them. I only see the other students of my pro, before or after me. There are some nice guys in my Salsa class and I wold love to ask one of them. It also occurred to me that it might be awkward asking a guy to be your dance partner, what if he says no?--I mean, obviously he has a right to say yes or no, but what if....oh well, gotta try right...

[Terpsichorean Clod]

Ok so I guess pro's reaction when I broach the idea of helping me find an AM partner will tell whether he is after his income from me, or my welfare! I really have no idea how many men take privates at the studio from women, as I never see them. I only see the other students of my pro, before or after me.Try practicing at the studio at other times. Maybe try taking classes at other studios. BTW, men don't necessarily take privates from women. ;)
There are some nice guys in my Salsa class and I wold love to ask one of them.Go for it!
what if he says no?--I mean, obviously he has a right to say yes or no, but what if....Welcome to our world. ;) Seriously, guys are almost always very flattered to be asked. They may still decline, but they're not going to scream at you, "How dare little old you even dream of approaching me?"

[Cheery]

Try practicing at the studio at other times. Maybe try taking classes at other studios. BTW, men don't necessarily take privates from women. ;)
Go for it!
Welcome to our world. ;) Seriously, guys are almost always very flattered to be asked. They may still decline, but they're not going to scream at you, "How dare little old you even dream of approaching me?"

I suppose the most important thing would be whether they have similar goals as me, and available time and money to accomplish this. I'll try and ask pro in a couple of days and see his reaction.

Incidentally, what do you mean, men don't necessarily take privates from women? You mean they take privates from other men???

[Terpsichorean Clod]

I suppose the most important thing would be whether they have similar goals as me, and available time and money to accomplish this. I'll try and ask pro in a couple of days and see his reaction.
I think you should also be willing to compromise. For example, I've known of people who were willing to shoulder a larger portion of the costs for the right partner who wasn't as financially able, but brought something else to the table.
Incidentally, what do you mean, men don't necessarily take privates from women? You mean they take privates from other men???

Naw, they self-teach through DVDs. :razz:

(actually, there's some truth to that...)

[Gorme]

Incidentally, what do you mean, men don't necessarily take privates from women? You mean they take privates from other men???

Sometimes you will see a male student taking a lesson with a male pro. It's to work on something specific that a female pro may have trouble conveying. Those male students typically either have a female pro or a female amateur partner. I have yet to see a male student w/o a partner take lessons primarily from a male pro.

I don't consider watching DVDs as a private lesson.

[Cheery]

I think you should also be willing to compromise. For example, I've known of people who were willing to shoulder a larger portion of the costs for the right partner who wasn't as financially able, but brought something else to the table.

Naw, they self-teach through DVDs. :razz:

(actually, there's some truth to that...)

Hmm, my plan of finding an amateur dp was foiled! Today after private class, I asked pro if he could help me find one. He said he prefers me to dance with him only, because if I dance with anyone else it might just bring my dancing down. He wants me to dance up only for now. I suppose I have to trust him. I do get annoyed when I dance with lesser capable partners in group classes. But that's because I'm used to dancing with pro always. Anyway, I decided to finally go a social because pro said that he teaches some street dances there and I am interested to learn them. Who knows, I may find an interesting partner at least, during the social. But having no dance partner? Is this familiar sounding advice? Is it because I am too green? Been taking privates 6 months now.

[DL]

Hmm, my plan of finding an amateur dp was foiled! Today after private class, I asked pro if he could help me find one. He said he prefers me to dance with him only, because if I dance with anyone else it might just bring my dancing down. He wants me to dance up only for now. I suppose I have to trust him. I do get annoyed when I dance with lesser capable partners in group classes. But that's because I'm used to dancing with pro always. Anyway, I decided to finally go a social because pro said that he teaches some street dances there and I am interested to learn them. Who knows, I may find an interesting partner at least, during the social. But having no dance partner? Is this familiar sounding advice? Is it because I am too green? Been taking privates 6 months now.

My reaction:

From what I've seen on DF, it's not unheard-of for a pro to advance this argument. Amateur partners will pick up some bad habits as they accommodate each other in their practices (at least, I know this has sometimes been the case in my own amateur partnership).

But if dancing with an amateur partner is something you want, be clear and stick to it. IMO it would be unreasonable for a pro to put his foot down and fight you on this point.

At any rate if you're satisfied with the instruction you're getting, I might suggest that it's not a crucial short-term issue. Keep learning, go to socials, meet fellow dancers, keep looking for a partner -- and see who you meet. It's not as if you've found an ideal partner already, started to practice, and heard your teacher tell you to stop (right?).

However see also what others have to say about this.

[pruthe]

Sometimes you will see a male student taking a lesson with a male pro. It's to work on something specific that a female pro may have trouble conveying. Those male students typically either have a female pro or a female amateur partner. I have yet to see a male student w/o a partner take lessons primarily from a male pro.

I don't consider watching DVDs as a private lesson.

My teachers are a married couple. I primarily take lessons from the lady, but I also take lessons from the man periodically to get his point of view.

[Terpsichorean Clod]

Hmm, my plan of finding an amateur dp was foiled! Today after private class, I asked pro if he could help me find one. He said he prefers me to dance with him only, because if I dance with anyone else it might just bring my dancing down. He wants me to dance up only for now. I suppose I have to trust him.
I'm sorry but I don't think I buy that. It's one thing to advise you against dancing with people worse than you. I think it's another to keep you from people who are worse than your pro. And it sounds like a blanket statement - not to dance with anyone else because it "might" bring your dancing down. I would expect your pro to at least have your prospective partner come in for a tryout lesson with you before rejecting him. And even if your partner were worse than you, I think a pro should be able to keep you improving. And a good pro would use the weaknesses of that partner to teach you skills that will transfer to future partnerships. To me, he sounds like a pro who wants to make his students dependent on him, rather than turn them into capable dancers on their own, able to enhance the dancing of lesser partners even without compromising their own skill.

That's not to say it's wrong for people to dance exclusively with their pro. But to me, it seems that those who do so and are very capable dancers, tend to be with pros who are willing to let them go.
I do get annoyed when I dance with lesser capable partners in group classes. But that's because I'm used to dancing with pro always.
Do you mean less capable than your pro or less capable than you? Also, especially when starting out, it can be difficult to judge ability (see lovely post by wooh: http://danceforums.com/showpost.php?p=696210). I've been on the other side of that. :rolleyes: ;)
Anyway, I decided to finally go a social because pro said that he teaches some street dances there and I am interested to learn them. Who knows, I may find an interesting partner at least, during the social. But having no dance partner? Is this familiar sounding advice? Is it because I am too green? Been taking privates 6 months now.

I've helped out with a program where the beginners were partnered up pretty much from the first week. Most of them turn out pretty well, some lasting for 5 years or more. You might be interested in reading this. when it is time to start looking for a partner? (http://danceforums.com/showthread.php?t=7805)

[fascination]

my two cents...having only waded through half of what has been written;

if you don't set a goal, you won't achieve one
no amount of practice alone is ever a waste and can be monitored by sharing what you are practicing w/ your instructor...
there is nothing wrong with going to group lessons or socials as long as what you hear there, if it is in conflict with something your instructor has said, gets discussed