View Full Version : Dancing in front of MOM... horrible!!!
JANATHOME
10-03-2009, 05:01 PM
OMG, how horrible is this!!!
My mom is 92 years old... She really wanted to see us dance, after 15 or so years of us of dancing as a couple...., So I aksed the orgainzers of CSC if they could let us dance with the pro-ams on Friday afternoon, before mom goes to bed!!! This comp is local to us.
So... to start off with I see my mom in the gown section... Very bad situation....First lecture, mom sees the price tags and she wants to make sure I would not pay this much for a gown.....
Oh great, my sisters who drove her there wants to know how many of these gowns I own, I say 6.... was sure mom would have a heart attack right then and there....
So we dance.... It was God awful.... I was so worried about her that I forgot everything I learned over the past 15 years.... Poor husband just kind of drags me around the floor!!!Good news though, the judges and deck captains we know us took so good care of my Mom, treated her real special, escorted her to a table to watch us. They were so nice to her .. Very cool....
After this nightmare was over she wanted to know who was that beautiful blond lady with the cute dog!!! That would be Larinda who I introduced to Mom, thanks L!! Made her day!!
I am so gald this is over!!! Never want to dance in front of Mom again!!
I see nothing horrible about it at all :D
Sounds like it was an amazing time, especially for her.
I see nothing horrible about it at all :D
Sounds like it was an amazing time, especially for her.
I agree...and, as someone who no longer has her Mom...I would love to have been in your shoes... Would.have.loved.it...every.second...
I'm sure it is normal to feel awkward in front of family and friends...and I wouldn't be surprised if, looking back on it, you'll smile...a big smile...
JANATHOME
10-03-2009, 05:19 PM
Of course you are all right... Did not tell you the end of the story....
After our afternoon of dancing we all came back to my house, husband made a great dinner for my sisters and mom and was a wonderful night..... He insisted that I just spend time with my sis's and mom and put on a great spread on his own....
Just wished I could of showed them better dancing, not that they would of even known!!
samina
10-03-2009, 05:25 PM
sounds like a great experience for your mum, janathome. and don't forget...she's both 92 and not an experienced ballroomer, so the flubs and weaknesses that horrified you, i bet she didn't notice in the least! she was probably overwhelmed by the grandeur, by the big picture...not the details you are certainly sensitive to because of your training and experience!
am so glad to hear you evening wound up so nicely in the end!
fascination
10-03-2009, 05:26 PM
your mother got to see you dance...for those of us who will never have that opportunity, enjoy and be kind to yourself
Sylph
10-03-2009, 05:45 PM
Hey Janathome.
I can relate sooo well. Last weekend I competed in an international Pro-Am Ballroom and Latin competition. I have recently returned to ballroom/latin dancing after a 1.5 year absence. We bought tickets for my mom to watch the Ballroom section. It went quite well and she enjoyed it so much that I bought her a ticket for the Latins as well.
Unfortunately I overthought everything and forgot most of my steps in the Latins. I couldn't even shine! I have NO idea what the frig I was doing, besides embarrassing myself and my teacher!!!:headwall: Of course my most devout fans all thought I danced well, but I know it was such a disaster!!
Anyway, the utter devastation at my poor performance is completely internal.:-( Everyone else enjoyed the dancing but were sad that I was sad, as they couldn't see what was wrong with my dancing.
Ah well... I guess I have to look forward to the next competition or ballet concert and not wear my utter disgust with myself on my swarovski bejewelled sleeve!
j_alexandra
10-03-2009, 05:48 PM
your mother got to see you dance...for those of us who will never have that opportunity, enjoy and be kind to yourself
Amen. <sniff>
JANATHOME
10-03-2009, 06:26 PM
Yup.....Samina....
I love my husband for ths...At the end of our foxtrot, Nick framed me to take a bow right in front of Mom.....
Very nice husband, he much did not care about our placements but just getting me in front of my mom..... So I winked at her, she winked back...
I hear you all with moms you no longer have. I am one of the lucky ones.
etp777
10-03-2009, 06:27 PM
Sounds stressful at the time, but a wonderful day/opportunity.
And your husband did great. :)
Larinda McRaven
10-03-2009, 09:35 PM
So we dance.... It was God awful.... I was so worried about her that I forgot everything I learned over the past 15 years.... Poor husband just kind of drags me around the floor!!!
I saw bits and pieces... It was NOT God awful. It was fine. Your senses, because of the moment and situation, just heightened your awareness and all the little things seem much more glaring. You were fine.
Larinda McRaven
10-03-2009, 09:38 PM
It was good to see you again and meet your family!
3wishes
10-03-2009, 11:19 PM
I can certainly identify with your worry and concern about your mother. We are, always and forever, our parents children - no matter how old we get or our life experiences. You did something for your mother (and sisters?) that made a memory worth telling about - for her. Stop the self-flogging - and warmly embrace the bigger picture. Many of us can only wish that our mothers were here - even if it were to scold us on our far too expensive dresses (-: Enjoy.
Flyingkamakiri
10-04-2009, 12:20 AM
I wish my parents would take more attention to my ballroom activities. They've refused to go to most of my competitions and showcases. I say most, just because my Dad showed up for my very first competition in SJSU. But yeah, I do not think that these kinds of things would hold their attention.
Its great that your Mom was there to support you. I'm so jealous!
BTW YAY! I'm a Tradesman!
Ahhh, I'm sure your mom that you were great! (And of course you don't pay nearly THAT much for a gown, right? :) )
(And of course you don't pay nearly THAT much for a gown, right? :) )
Nope apparently she pays that much for six of them :uplaugh:
tanya_the_dancer
10-04-2009, 05:29 PM
Well, my mom got to see me dance in person twice so far. I think the first time was for my second competition and the next time was when I went to Colorado star ball. Of course, now that she knows about Colorado star ball, which is practically in her back yard, she is just waiting for me to do it again. So I could not convince her to go watch HOA (a 2 hours flight or a 9 hour drive for her), she came up with all sorts of creative excuses. But she does like to watch my videos and comes up with constructive criticism (which kinda bothers me, btw, considering that her dance experience consists of 3-4 months of ballet some 50 years ago).
NonieS
10-04-2009, 05:45 PM
my parents have seen me dance a few times... they are very supportive of it as a hobby and are finally starting to warm up to my goals of turning professional (the first time I mentioned that, they laughed at me) ... they do not support me financially, however, so I pay for all my lessons out of my poor college student's bank acct; but they are very emotionally supportive :D I feel very lucky, especially when I hear stories from people whose parents are not supportive or are not around to be supportive at all.
I sympathize with your situation, which is a common one. We all get very nervous when dancing in front of family and friends. I have had to dance in front of my mother twice, and friends once. Both times I was off my game and nervous. We all want our family and friends to think we are amazing dancers! It's only natural. It sounds to me like your mother had a wonderful time. Next time she comes to see you dance, you'll be a little less nervous!
Piggles
10-05-2009, 11:34 AM
Ooohhh - I'm competing in front of my parents for the first time at the end of the month. Hope my nerves stay intact! :eek: +ve vibes....+ve vibes...
JANATHOME
10-05-2009, 12:15 PM
No worries Piggles.
Thinking back, all of my stress was really self inflicted. The closer I got to the competition the more I really did not want to do it, and got myself all worked up for nothing.
After all was said and done, it really was a nice time. LOL, take my expereince and do the opposite of what I did, just enjoy it!
emeralddancer
10-06-2009, 12:35 PM
I envy you and any other who has a mom that is supportive. The one and only time my parents came ... well .... my dad was beaming (I am thankful for, after all I am a daddy's girl) but did over hear him say to my mother ...N, if you can not say anything nice to her keep your mouth shut. (LOL) yeah the relationship is not the greatest with mom.
However my friends and kids are always my biggest fans. Can't wait to do another show and my first comp. =)
Piggles
10-07-2009, 11:38 AM
Yeah, it's the "support" of my parents I'm worried about. My mom will say something nice like she likes my costumes, but it's Dad I'm worried about (which is funny because I'm closer to my Dad). I can almost guarantee he'll say: You've been dancing for almost 5 years and THAT's ALL you have to show for it? I thought these were real competitions...
Maybe I can persuade my husband to go golfing with him that day instead. :eek:
madmaximus
10-07-2009, 12:12 PM
I have a great relationship with my mom.
But... she's never seen me dance all these years---nor does she want to.
m
emkey
10-07-2009, 07:06 PM
oddly enough I like it more when family comes in watch makes me wanna show off more lol and I get someone in the audiences who I can interact with during those pointing moments
tanya_the_dancer
10-07-2009, 07:32 PM
oddly enough I like it more when family comes in watch makes me wanna show off more lol and I get someone in the audiences who I can interact with during those pointing moments
that's what sometimes messes me up - I want to show off and end up making mistakes I wouldn't have made if I were focusing on the moment.
As long as it isn't something that's supposed to be sexy, I'm ok in front of family. (They don't know what it's supposed to look like anyway.) But it's hard enough for me to fake sexy without trying to do it in front of my parents though.:p
latingal
10-07-2009, 10:43 PM
but it's Dad I'm worried about (which is funny because I'm closer to my Dad). I can almost guarantee he'll say: You've been dancing for almost 5 years and THAT's ALL you have to show for it?
I've got an easy solution for that one....sign him up for a couple of lessons, they quickly learn just how hard it is to learn these styles. *grin*
etp777
10-07-2009, 10:46 PM
As long as it isn't something that's supposed to be sexy, I'm ok in front of family. (They don't know what it's supposed to look like anyway.) But it's hard enough for me to fake sexy without trying to do it in front of my parents though.:p
Don't get me started on that. That's why I aim (still working on it obviously), for the powerful rhythm dancer image, not hte sexy one. :)
Piggles
10-08-2009, 12:13 PM
Latingal, I totally hear you (and boy have I considered it)! Actually....that's not a bad idea: "Dad, one word out of you and you're getting a year's supply of dance lessons!" Of course, I'd be all about a year of dancing lessons paid by someone else....
samina
10-08-2009, 12:43 PM
Don't get me started on that. That's why I aim (still working on it obviously), for the powerful rhythm dancer image, not hte sexy one. :)
oh go on... let it out... you know you want to...:cool:
latingal
10-09-2009, 02:58 AM
that's not a bad idea: "Dad, one word out of you and you're getting a year's supply of dance lessons!"
that will probably scare the pants off of him sufficiently to ensure no untowards comments...
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