SDsalsaguy
06-08-2004, 03:24 PM
At New York Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to
be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule and a
calculator.
Attorney general John Ashcroft believes the man is a member of the
notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons
of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a very fearsome cult, indeed", Ashcroft said. "They
desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off
on a tangent in a search of absolute value. They consist of quite shadowy
figures, with names like "x" and "y", and, although they are frequently
referred to as "unknowns", we know they really belong to a common
denominator and are part of the axis of medieval with coordinates in
every country.
As the great Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3
sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If G-d had
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
given us more fingers and toes.
be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule and a
calculator.
Attorney general John Ashcroft believes the man is a member of the
notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons
of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a very fearsome cult, indeed", Ashcroft said. "They
desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off
on a tangent in a search of absolute value. They consist of quite shadowy
figures, with names like "x" and "y", and, although they are frequently
referred to as "unknowns", we know they really belong to a common
denominator and are part of the axis of medieval with coordinates in
every country.
As the great Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3
sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If G-d had
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
given us more fingers and toes.