Male or Female Instructors?

[LoveTango]

I start to consider taking some private lessons.

I wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor. I am a follower. What is your experience or opinion?

This could have been discussed on the forum already, but I was not able to find the thread(s).

Thanks a lot!

[Bailamosdance]

are you a male or female follower?

[ant]

I wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor.
What topics do you want to go over and do you have feel as to what teachers would be more appropriate for each of those topics.

[LoveTango]

are you a male or female follower?

I am a female follower.

[LoveTango]

What topics do you want to go over and do you have feel as to what teachers would be more appropriate for each of those topics.

I don't plan to go over new moves/steps. I just hope to use the private lessons to rectify my postures/embraces and to correct bad habits, which I don't know what. I hope the teacher will be able to identify my problems.

[Peaches]

Go with a male teacher for the majority of your lessons. Supplement that with occasional lessons from a woman.

If you have the chance to take a lesson from a both at the same time, do it. The single best lesson i think I've ever had was when I danced with the guy (of a partnership), while she watched. There was dual feedback--what he felt, along with what she saw. Incredibly useful.

[LoveTango]

Go with a male teacher for the majority of your lessons. Supplement that with occasional lessons from a woman.

If you have the chance to take a lesson from a both at the same time, do it. The single best lesson i think I've ever had was when I danced with the guy (of a partnership), while she watched. There was dual feedback--what he felt, along with what she saw. Incredibly useful.

I heard about taking from a couple before. It must be very helpful. I just don't have the budget to have two teachers at the same time.

Just a thought, maybe having a partner to attend the lesson would be good? So the instructor can see and feel (though not at the same time).

[dchester]

I start to consider taking some private lessons.

I wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor. I am a follower. What is your experience or opinion?

This could have been discussed on the forum already, but I was not able to find the thread(s).

Thanks a lot!
I think if you can alternate periodically, that would be the best. A women teacher would likely be better at teaching certain techniques, embellishments, etc, while a male teacher might be better at teaching aspects related to the lead and follow, response, connection, etc.

A more important variable might be the skill of the teacher(s), however, along with the specific goals of the privates.

Edit: I like Peaches answer, both together, if possible.

[opendoor]

..wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor. I am a follower..

dont take an instructor at all, only take a teacher !!

I (leader) only ever had privates with female teachers.
And I would recommend this for you as a followers, as well.

Female teacher can show you all the women stuff, but can also take you in the arms and lead you and give you some experiences in following.

[ant]

I don't plan to go over new moves/steps. I just hope to use the private lessons to rectify my postures/embraces and to correct bad habits, which I don't know what. I hope the teacher will be able to identify my problems.

In that case I would initially take a lesson from both, see what they say and decide from there. If you feel that they have hit on all the areas you feel are relevant, then stay with them. It may be that the man will identify more areas but the woman would be better suited to sort them out.

If they have not hit on all the areas you feel may be relevant then maybe use other teachers as well until those areas are well defined in your mind.

Then choose who you want to work on them. But remember, the teachers that are best at diagnosing problems are not neccessarily the best at resolving them.

[Peaches]

Female teacher can show you all the women stuff, but can also take you in the arms and lead you and give you some experiences in following.Yes, they can. But women just feel different as leaders. Personally, i would not take lessons regularly from someone whose primary role is the same as mine (following, in this case).

[Peaches]

I heard about taking from a couple before. It must be very helpful. I just don't have the budget to have two teachers at the same time.Don't write it off just yet. When I have done this, it was with visiting teachers (couples/partnerships) during the course of a tango festival of some sort. They charged an hourly price, which was the same as a regular private lesson with only one of them...they just happened to both be there.

Day in, day out...no, you probably won't find this. But if there are special events going on, with special teachers brought in...then you might find yourself pleasantly surprised.

[mkjohnson]

Peaches is right, with visiting teaching couples, the rate is usually very good for both of them (very little difference from studying with just one.)

I've had privates with both men and women, single and in couples, and before finding my current teacher, I would have probably recommended (as a follower) finding a male/leader, however my teacher now is a very strong leader. She also has an excellent understanding of body mechanics (if that's the right phrase?) so she can not only feel the problem (in my posture, embrace, whatever), but very clearly tell me how to correct it.

It may take a little trial and error to find a teacher that's a good fit (which is trying on the budget, I must admit). I recommend asking for recommendations from other dancers - not only who they like, but why they like them.

[Dave Bailey]

I start to consider taking some private lessons.

I wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor. I am a follower. What is your experience or opinion?
Go with the best teacher. :D

OK, OK, being a bit more helpful... a female teacher will be best able to give you advice on how best to do things. A male teacher will be best able to show you what works in a dance.

But really, any competent teacher should be able to teach both leaders and followers, and also take both parts, as required.

[Zoopsia59]

I start to consider taking some private lessons.
I wonder if I should go with a female instructor or with a male instructor. I am a follower. What is your experience or opinion?!

My experience is that most of my best lessons as a follower were with female teachers who knew how to lead.

If what you want to work on is about posture, body mechanics and fundamental technique, I really think it's better to have someone who not only knows your part but also knows how shoes affect your dance. Of course, even some of the female teachers can't relate to the problems that arise for ther rest of us when our shoe heels get higher, because they have those gorgeous feet that point like a ballerina's. But I have yet to find a male teacher who has even the first clue about what happens when you walk forward in a 3"-4" heel vs what happens when you walk forward in flats. He may see or feel that something changes in your dance when you change your shoes, but he often doesn't know what to tell you to do about it.

That's not to say you should limit your instruction to female teachers. There is a lot to be learned from even just dancing with a leader who is of a very high caliber. It's likely that no one you dance with socially will be at that level, and the only way to have that experience is in a lesson. There's also a great deal to learn about following that requires being led (and led well) so instruction from leaders is also very valuable. One of the most valuable things I ever got told in a lesson was when a well known male teacher said to me "You actually follow really well... if you're having trouble following socially, it isn't you." Just hearing that did wonders for my confidence, which in turn made me a much better (more relaxed) follower. (he also did give me some other useful tips and instruction... it wasn't all praise)

In general however, for MY specific issues, I have come away from lessons with female teachers feeling like I got so much that it will take awhile to implement, and I come away from many of my lessons with male teachers wondering if I should have invested my money elsewhere. Male teachers tell me what I'm doing wrong and how it needs to be. Female teachers have examined WHY I can't do it "right" and have helped me understand ways to use my body to make it better.

In my lessons with female teachers, I might dance with them, but there's also a fair amount of dancing on your own while being watched or doing specific exercises/ drills to focus on technique. There also might be muscles in your lower belly (near the crotch) upper thigh/hip, or pectoral region that the teacher wants to deal with and a male teacher may not want to touch you where those muscles are to help you feel them (or in the case of the muscles where the leg joins the torso or lower ab, may not feel comfortable having you place your hands on him to feel what he is doing with those muscles.) I have have had female teachers put pressure on muscles in these places to help me feel them and also have had them place my hand on theirs to feel the movement. Some of that is just more awkward with the opposite sex.

However... a big disclaimer.... I am talking about private lessons as an advanced-intermediate to advanced level dancer for someone who has been tango'ing for years. My FIRST teacher was a man and he gave me some of the most important basic information about following I've ever gotten. Many of the people I knew at that time were NOT getting some of what he considered the most fundamental instruction (leaders or followers). So it doesn't have to be a gender issue at all. Some people are better teachers. Some people are a better fit for a specific student. The only way to know is to try someone out. And I agree that teaching couples are often the best bet, but usually are cost prohibitive.

I'll also add that whether or not you like or dislike a teacher's group class may not correlate to whether you find private instruction from them useful. For the most part, I wasn't enthralled with the group classes of several of my favorite teachers for private instruction.

[pascal]

I don't plan to go over new moves/steps. I just hope to use the private lessons to rectify my postures/embraces and to correct bad habits, which I don't know what. I hope the teacher will be able to identify my problems.

Female teacher then.

[Peaches]

Great post, Zoo.

I will add one other thing in there, along the lines of being comfortable with your teacher. If you have a hard time learning from one gender or another, that should definitely be taken into consideration. I say this because I know that I have an extremely hard time learning from, and being critiqued/criticised by another female. Don't ask me why, but I get resentful and tune out. I know, therefore, to look for men as my primary teachers.

[LoveTango]

I think if you can alternate periodically, that would be the best. A women teacher would likely be better at teaching certain techniques, embellishments, etc, while a male teacher might be better at teaching aspects related to the lead and follow, response, connection, etc.

A more important variable might be the skill of the teacher(s), however, along with the specific goals of the privates.

Edit: I like Peaches answer, both together, if possible.

Yes. So far I have only had female teachers. I think in future, I should try male teachers. I don't have a big budget for frequent private lessons, so it will be a long process "alternating periodically".

[LoveTango]

I have to agree with Peach, that it feels different being lead by a slim female. It feels funny doing close embrace with another female. Yet, trying to have a male teacher to learn close embrace sounds a bit, eh, embarassing.

dont take an instructor at all, only take a teacher !!

I (leader) only ever had privates with female teachers.
And I would recommend this for you as a followers, as well.

Female teacher can show you all the women stuff, but can also take you in the arms and lead you and give you some experiences in following.

[LoveTango]

In that case I would initially take a lesson from both, see what they say and decide from there. If you feel that they have hit on all the areas you feel are relevant, then stay with them. It may be that the man will identify more areas but the woman would be better suited to sort them out.

If they have not hit on all the areas you feel may be relevant then maybe use other teachers as well until those areas are well defined in your mind.

Then choose who you want to work on them. But remember, the teachers that are best at diagnosing problems are not neccessarily the best at resolving them.

you help me confirm that I should start trying male teachers.

[LoveTango]

Yes, they can. But women just feel different as leaders. Personally, i would not take lessons regularly from someone whose primary role is the same as mine (following, in this case).

Yes, I agree. It feels different being lead by a female, particularly if she is slim.

[LoveTango]

I will keep that option open. I might get lucky someday.

Peaches is right, with visiting teaching couples, the rate is usually very good for both of them (very little difference from studying with just one.)

I've had privates with both men and women, single and in couples, and before finding my current teacher, I would have probably recommended (as a follower) finding a male/leader, however my teacher now is a very strong leader. She also has an excellent understanding of body mechanics (if that's the right phrase?) so she can not only feel the problem (in my posture, embrace, whatever), but very clearly tell me how to correct it.

It may take a little trial and error to find a teacher that's a good fit (which is trying on the budget, I must admit). I recommend asking for recommendations from other dancers - not only who they like, but why they like them.

[LoveTango]

Go with the best teacher. :D

OK, OK, being a bit more helpful... a female teacher will be best able to give you advice on how best to do things. A male teacher will be best able to show you what works in a dance.

But really, any competent teacher should be able to teach both leaders and followers, and also take both parts, as required.

Yes. I think I should have a male teacher now. But just realized, lot of what I do, I learned from the good partners who are male. :)

[LoveTango]

Well, I never realized that shoes can be a deciding factor. I thought it only taking some getting used to.

I just got myself a pair of tango shoes which is an inch higher in the heels. I wonder when I would dare to try them out.

My experience is that most of my best lessons as a follower were with female teachers who knew how to lead.

If what you want to work on is about posture, body mechanics and fundamental technique, I really think it's better to have someone who not only knows your part but also knows how shoes affect your dance. Of course, even some of the female teachers can't relate to the problems that arise for ther rest of us when our shoe heels get higher, because they have those gorgeous feet that point like a ballerina's. But I have yet to find a male teacher who has even the first clue about what happens when you walk forward in a 3"-4" heel vs what happens when you walk forward in flats. He may see or feel that something changes in your dance when you change your shoes, but he often doesn't know what to tell you to do about it.

That's not to say you should limit your instruction to female teachers. There is a lot to be learned from even just dancing with a leader who is of a very high caliber. It's likely that no one you dance with socially will be at that level, and the only way to have that experience is in a lesson. There's also a great deal to learn about following that requires being led (and led well) so instruction from leaders is also very valuable. One of the most valuable things I ever got told in a lesson was when a well known male teacher said to me "You actually follow really well... if you're having trouble following socially, it isn't you." Just hearing that did wonders for my confidence, which in turn made me a much better (more relaxed) follower. (he also did give me some other useful tips and instruction... it wasn't all praise)

In general however, for MY specific issues, I have come away from lessons with female teachers feeling like I got so much that it will take awhile to implement, and I come away from many of my lessons with male teachers wondering if I should have invested my money elsewhere. Male teachers tell me what I'm doing wrong and how it needs to be. Female teachers have examined WHY I can't do it "right" and have helped me understand ways to use my body to make it better.

In my lessons with female teachers, I might dance with them, but there's also a fair amount of dancing on your own while being watched or doing specific exercises/ drills to focus on technique. There also might be muscles in your lower belly (near the crotch) upper thigh/hip, or pectoral region that the teacher wants to deal with and a male teacher may not want to touch you where those muscles are to help you feel them (or in the case of the muscles where the leg joins the torso or lower ab, may not feel comfortable having you place your hands on him to feel what he is doing with those muscles.) I have have had female teachers put pressure on muscles in these places to help me feel them and also have had them place my hand on theirs to feel the movement. Some of that is just more awkward with the opposite sex.

However... a big disclaimer.... I am talking about private lessons as an advanced-intermediate to advanced level dancer for someone who has been tango'ing for years. My FIRST teacher was a man and he gave me some of the most important basic information about following I've ever gotten. Many of the people I knew at that time were NOT getting some of what he considered the most fundamental instruction (leaders or followers). So it doesn't have to be a gender issue at all. Some people are better teachers. Some people are a better fit for a specific student. The only way to know is to try someone out. And I agree that teaching couples are often the best bet, but usually are cost prohibitive.

I'll also add that whether or not you like or dislike a teacher's group class may not correlate to whether you find private instruction from them useful. For the most part, I wasn't enthralled with the group classes of several of my favorite teachers for private instruction.

[LoveTango]

Female teacher then.

Thanks. :)

[Lilly_of_the_valley]

Both.
In your case, I would start with a female if you have a large choice of great teachers, or just the best teacher available in the area if you don't.

[passiontango]

In case you can find a male partner who is interested in taking lessons from the couple (male and female teachers) - would be the best. Otherwise taking lessons from the male teacher will give you more opportunities to become a better follower.

[LoveTango]

In case you can find a male partner who is interested in taking lessons from the couple (male and female teachers) - would be the best. Otherwise taking lessons from the male teacher will give you more opportunities to become a better follower.

That's a great idea. I don't usually communicate with other leaders in such level (usually just dance, not much of small talks), so have to put some effort to find out if a leader is interested. I am, in general, avoid having fixed partner.

[LoveTango]

Both.
In your case, I would start with a female if you have a large choice of great teachers, or just the best teacher available in the area if you don't.

Yes. Thanks. I started with a female teacher. :)

[Zsana]

Hi,
Will you pls make it clear for me if the answers were all advised for followers? I just tried to find some discussion on this topic (male/female teacher for privates) from leaders' point of view. This forum is sooo extensive that sometimes I feel it would take ages to find what I want to read about. If there is an older topic on it and anyone knows the link .... I am interested
Thx

[bordertangoman]

One one the best private lessons I had was from a couple because;

you are observed by the non-dancing partner and they can see things that the person you are dancing with cant and conversely the person dancing with you can feel things that cant be seen...

[Steve Pastor]

This forum is sooo extensive that sometimes I feel it would take ages to find what I want to read about.

Hello, Zsana, and welcome.

I'd say, feel free to bring something up if you want to discuss it. We have new people showing up all the time, and they will bring different experiences and perspectives to the discussion.

[Zsana]

Ok. So how does leader guys here feel about taking privates with a female teacher? Is it common for the leaders with poor technique to take privates with a lady to make their dance more comfortable? I think group lessons are rather about... well, many other things e.g. elements (put in sequences to work on them), uncommon/surprising combos or musicality, but not much time for polishing movements. Of course, you are supposed to do that on practicas. But, sometimes working with a partner at your own level just won't work. When the leader has some understanding - probably getting it done almost every time - but his lead is quite uncomfortable, do you think that he is aware of that? How does one FEEL if he/she is not comfortable for the partner? Do you think rather a male or female teacher be more useful for a leader in case?

[Zoopsia59]

When the leader has some understanding - probably getting it done almost every time - but his lead is quite uncomfortable, do you think that he is aware of that? How does one FEEL if he/she is not comfortable for the partner? Do you think rather a male or female teacher be more useful for a leader in case?

I think a teacher who has a great deal of experience as a follower would make sense here. I also think that many men are not comfortable dancing with another man, so they would be more likely to dance the way they normally do when dancing with a female partner (not true of everyone of course, but it seems like the workshops I've attended where the class is divided and leaders must dance with each other, there's a LOT more resistance from them than from the women who are dancing with each other)

There are exceptions though... one leader I know who needed to make some adjustments got the message better from a male teacher (who was primarily a leader) than from all the followers who had been telling him the exact same thing in practicas, including some followers who were also teachers.

My point is... the skill of the teacher matters more than the gender of the teacher, except in the cases where the student's unwillingness to learn from or dance with teachers of a specific gender is a factor. (and it IS a factor far too often!)

In my limited teaching experience, people taking privates do seem to have a preference for teachers who dance the opposite role (and are the opposite sex) rather than their own... even when they would be better served with their particular problem by taking a lesson from someone who specializes in the SAME role.

[dchester]

One one the best private lessons I had was from a couple because;

you are observed by the non-dancing partner and they can see things that the person you are dancing with cant and conversely the person dancing with you can feel things that cant be seen...
This ^

My point is... the skill of the teacher matters more than the gender of the teacher, except in the cases where the student's unwillingness to learn from or dance with teachers of a specific gender is a factor. (and it IS a factor far too often!)
and This ^

[opendoor]

I only can work with a female teacher. If a male is around I am at once in a rivalry or competetive mood. :(

[AndaBien]

I only can work with a female teacher. If a male is around I am at once in a rivalry or competetive mood. :(

Didn't you say you were involved in martial arts? Maybe you could adopt a different idea about male teachers. Just saying...

[opendoor]

Didn't you say you were involved in martial arts? Maybe you could adopt a different idea about male teachers. Just saying...

Touché, you could be right, but a menage a droit is difficult, isnt it? Usually in TaiJi forms (shadowboxing routines) you´ve got according to the rules of the 5 daoistic elements 5 enemies attacking from the corners.

[bordertangoman]

Touché, you could be right, but a menage a droit is difficult, isnt it? Usually in TaiJi forms (shadowboxing routines) you´ve got according to the rules of the 5 daoistic elements 5 enemies attacking from the corners.

more potential for Negrachas..lol....

[opendoor]

do you mean the London club? Do you have hewing and stabbing on the dance floor, there?

[bordertangoman]

do you mean the London club? Do you have hewing and stabbing on the dance floor, there?

apparently!! I have heard they have a "Last Man Standing tanda" ( to spaghetti western music of course; good old Ennio Morricone)