Friends versus strangers

[pygmalion]

How does your dance experience differ when you're dancing with people you don't know? Is it a better dance? worse? How about lead and follow? Are you dancing to impress? Evaluating?

Which do you prefer? To dance with a friend, or to dance with somebody completely new?

[mhgroove]

This is a good topic, Pygmalion.

I prefer dancing with a friend. When I first started salsa dancing, I was dating this woman and we learned to dance together. She was farther along (much farther along...) in salsa than I was. However, I love the way we danced together. Even though, I can be quite the perfectionist...she was patient with me and our dancing got better together. That was one of the best things about our relationship.

I realize now that I prefer dancing with a friend because I will be able to explore new steps and grow as dancers together. I have enjoyed dancing with new people, but more often than not you can be way off in your timing and you don't get the chance to learn each other's tendencies and rhythms.

[Vin]

A great dance with a friend can often be perfect, but nothing for me beats that feeling of having a great first dance with someone. Something about not expecting to connect and then connecting brings me so much joy.
When I dance with friends(dance friends I mean). I sort of expect that we will have a good connection. Often times we can have amazing dances.
But when I have an amazing dance with a stranger on the first try I have always felt closer to those women. For five minutes we shared a bond that was much stronger than what could be seen. In some sense we connect purely for the love of the dance.

The big problem is that rarely do I find someone who I connect with that quickly. Often times we don't connect until the second or maybe even third dance.

[Sagitta]

I prefer dancing with friends, of course. But the experience of connecting with a beginner, with a follower who has great sense of the beat, and can follow...amazing!! Of course you cannot do the same with her as a more advanced dancer, but it is such a great feeling, as Vin said.

I never dance to impress, no matter whom I dance with. Wrong attitude!!! How much I'm evaluating depends on how connected I'm feeling. If I get into a song probbaly zero evaluation. As for new moves, I'm more likely to try out with a friend as they will be more forgiving of a little fooling around. :)

[tsb]

depends. there are certain dances & songs i like to do with certain partners since a comfort level already exists. when it comes to new people i generally prefer to observe first (generally because i don't want to be part of the wolfpack that descends and tries to mark their territiry), so i've already got an idea of her skill level by the time i ask her to dance & i've already got an idea of what level to set my lead at.

having said that, my most enjoyable dances have been with someone who's been pointed out to me as someone i should dance with that i've never seen before. for me, it was the discovery that she followed everything perfectly - starting w/simple moves & going to more complex figures, but never needing more than what i consider my most advanced & subtle leads.

once a friend introduced me to her friend and asked me to dance with her & placed her hand in mine. while at first i thought that i little odd, but it wasn't until i got her into closed position that i realized that this person was blind! it was near the end of the night so we had a lot of floor space. she was pretty amazing. she moved well enough that we worked up to her doing a series of chaine turns where i caught her and went into pivot turns. the faith & trust there was pretty gratifying - not to mention the looks on the faces of the people watching <sigh....>

when you have a known quantity you can limit the potential... disappointment(?)/downside/whatever, but you can also limit the potential pleasure of the experience as well. i fear that i am far too easily pleased.

[cocodrilo]

I pretty much have the same opinion as Sagitta. I feel much more at ease dancing with friends but will never turn down a newcomer unless he is a known serial killer... :shock:

[pygmalion]

I love this thread. 8)

[salsachinita]

While I love dancing with my friends/regulars/favourites, there's something really exciting about dancing with a stranger :wink: .

Our scene is small enough for me to know just about everyone (and just about everyone knows me, or at least have seen me out). Newbies will come up and ask for a dance here & there, but I'm kinda not talking about them (as they might be new, certainly no strangers).

I'm talking about the lone stranger, with the presence of a dancer (see my old thread http://www.dance-forums.com/viewtopic.php?t=2139&highlight=dancers+presence).

I've been able to almost sense the presence of a visiting salsero from another city/country. I've always been drawn to them, as there would always be new things I can learn from these guys. New challenges. New flava. New connection. Very exciting indeed :D !

Ok, we might not have instant connection.....but the mere opportunity to be exposed to something unfamiliar is so strangely attartcive to me 8) !

*I met CapricornDancer, SideShow Bob, Rico, plus other fantastic salseros this way*

[cocodrilo]

Wow, Salsachinita, I can hear music from "The Twilight Zone"... :shock:

[salsachinita]

Wow, Salsachinita, I can hear music from "The Twilight Zone"... :shock:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Believe me, there's nothing mysterious about being able to spot (ok, I used the word sense, as in I sensed that they wanna get that fix) visiting salseros, if your scene is as small as mine :wink: !

[ShyDancer]

Depends..............

Nothing beats a beautiful waltz with a stranger! Of course you can still dance beautiful waltzes with friends but with a stranger you enjoy every seond because there is always the mystery of "Will I get another dance?"

On the other hand, the more energetic dances,Cha Cha, Jive & Samba are dances I prefer to dance with people I know. Simply because you can try new things and friends arent hesitant about throwing you into a spin or giving you a bit more of a shove out to fan or cuban breaks etc, I LOVE that bit of extra energy , It makes the dance so much more fun when you walk off all out of breat after your almost acrobatic performance :D

[MacMoto]

A great dance with a friend can often be perfect, but nothing for me beats that feeling of having a great first dance with someone. Something about not expecting to connect and then connecting brings me so much joy.
When I dance with friends(dance friends I mean). I sort of expect that we will have a good connection. Often times we can have amazing dances.
But when I have an amazing dance with a stranger on the first try I have always felt closer to those women. For five minutes we shared a bond that was much stronger than what could be seen. In some sense we connect purely for the love of the dance.

Substitute "men" for "women" and these are exactly my thoughts.
I do love dancing with my favourite leaders (friends or otherwise) with whom I know I can have good dances, but there's nothing more exciting than dancing with a stranger and getting a great connection straight off. The dance itself may not necessarily be perfect in the sense of no mistakes (have I ever had a dance without making a single mistake? :oops: :oops:), but you still get that palpable sense of connecting with someone, which gives me a huge buzz. Many of my most memorable dances are ones I had with strangers (or "then strangers").

[squirrel]

It all depends... I like dancing with my friends and I like experiencing with new dancers... our scene is really small (I mean around 200 dancers and the regulars are around 50) and whenever a foreigner comes to town and is good I notice him and invite him... and it can be quite an interesting experience, especially if he dances differently than us... :) I danced with a guy who did the Cuban style, which I'm not particularly crazy about, but he was a good dancer and I had lots of fun just following him :)... and I always invited him again, as I do with most new dancers :)