Dinner Conversation Gone Bad

[peachexploration]

>WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
>
>HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
>
>WIFE: "Why not -- don't you like being married?"
>
>HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
>
>WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
>
>HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
>
>WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
>
>HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
>
>WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
>
>HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
>
>WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
>
>HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
>
>WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
>
>HUSBAND: "I guess so."
>
>WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?
>
>HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
>
>WIFE: - - - silence - - -
>
>HUSBAND: :headwall:

[Vince A]

Hell . . . it shut her up, didn't it??? J/K

[pygmalion]

Hmmm ... :roll:

[peachexploration]

Okay, maybe I'm just wierd. :lol: :lol: Thought it was pretty funny that he told on himself before he knew what hit him. She was probably a lawyer. The poor guy. :lol: :lol:

[pygmalion]

Yup. I thought it was funny,too. I'll have to PM you or chat one day, peach.


The deal is, people who THINK they're smart, usually aren't all that smart. :tongue:

[cocodrilo]

Peach-
I like your quote by George Eliot, yet the way the weather patterns are continuing over here it's more like;
"Sultry autumn. Record over-30-degrees centigrade for 89 days straight.
A never-ending hot flash."
:oops: (face flushed red with heat)

[tsb]

all he had to say initially was: "i couldn't even possibly imagine life without you."

The poor guy. :lol: :lol:

i'd agree, but for a different reason; while i do not advocate or condone infidelity, i can appreciate the desire of a man to be seek to be with someone else were this were a common example of the wife's behavior.

[Sabor]

Okay, maybe I'm just wierd. :lol: :lol:

tell us something we dont know :roll:

:kissme:

[peachexploration]

Peach-
I like your quote by George Eliot, yet the way the weather patterns are continuing over here it's more like;
"Sultry autumn. Record over-30-degrees centigrade for 89 days straight.
A never-ending hot flash."
:oops: (face flushed red with heat)

:lol: :lol: Yup, I've had enough of the 100F weather this year. There is slight coolness this morning finally. Ahhh, I can breathe now. I love Autumn. :)

[pygmalion]

October in Central Florida is absolutely beautiful. 8)

[Bob]

When faced with a similar question I told my (exceptionally tolerant) girlfriend:

"I don't want some young, beautiful, smart girl... I want YOU!

:shock:


(as it turns out, she has a pretty good left cross... mental note: remember that she is left handed when getting the guard up)

:D

[pygmalion]

Men! Why don't they get it? When women ask stupid and repetitive questions like that, what they really want (at least the ones I know) is to be reassured that, even though you have them, you still want them. Pretty easy to do.

So why do men resist so hard, one wonders? :roll:

Reminds me of an old friend who had an extremely insecure and jealous wife. You know what he did? Set out to "break" her out of it. He flirted with as many women as he possibly could, deliberately. He was clueless. What he needed to do was reassure his wife. If she was at all emotionally whole, the reassurance might have been enough for her to set him free. As it was, they were locked in conflict, unnecessarily.

(And yes, I know there are a lot of needy women out there. A lot of needy men, too, come to think of it. :wink: )

[peachexploration]

When faced with a similar question I told my (exceptionally tolerant) girlfriend:

"I don't want some young, beautiful, smart girl... I want YOU!

:shock:


(as it turns out, she has a pretty good left cross... mental note: remember that she is left handed when getting the guard up)

:D

One word. OUCH! :lol:

.... Set out to "break" her out of it....
Ooooohh. BIG mistake.....

Yup, not solving the problem. Just amplifying it. More hurt, more distrust, etc. I have a friend who is getting his tukus kicked for that same reason. Of course it back fired. Turned into the movie "Two Can Play that Game". Poor guy... :(

[tsb]

Men! Why don't they get it? When women ask stupid and repetitive questions like that, what they really want (at least the ones I know) is to be reassured that, even though you have them, you still want them. Pretty easy to do.

So why do men resist so hard, one wonders? :roll:


it works both ways. insanity has been defined as repeating the same behavior (i.e., the "stupid & repetitive questions like that") & expecting a different result. or saying things like "well if you don't know i'm not going to tell you!' when guys ask (in some state of anguish) "what do i do wrong?"


Reminds me of an old friend who had an extremely insecure and jealous wife. You know what he did? Set out to "break" her out of it. He flirted with as many women as he possibly could, deliberately. He was clueless. What he needed to do was reassure his wife. If she was at all emotionally whole, the reassurance might have been enough for her to set him free. As it was, they were locked in conflict, unnecessarily.


not if by definition she was extremely insecure & jealous; there would be no possible reassurance a husband could provide to such a wife; no crutch is sufficient for someone determined to continue limping.

the husband's intended goal as i understand it was to force the wife to face the answer to the question "what's the worst thing that could possibly happen?" in terms of trying to deal with the wife's fear. the fact that the husband in question selected a typically guy way of going about it should not come as a surprise - because it would have likely worked on a guy.

women complain that men don't understand them, but how much energy do they exert in trying to understand about how men think? i submit that if women understood a few basic things about guys about how & when to ask & how to anticipate his responses they'd be a lot less friustrated.

i love watching 'everyone loves raymond'. yeah, raymond usually comes off as clueless in how to deal with his wife (to keep the female demographics watching?) but he occasionally gets to illustrate the flip side of the coin. lines like:

-THIS IS NOT HUGGABLE!!!!
- you'd be on me like... a monkey on a cupcake!

[pygmalion]

Do you want to know my problem? I think like a man, but I feel like (and hear from lots of) women.

So I need alone time and absolute freedom. But I understand the compromises women make and the reasuurances they need. :?


It ain't easy, being in the middle (paraphrasing Kermit LOL)

[danceguy]

There's something to be said for honest, open communication. Mind games and innuendo get old real fast...it all has its time and place, but many of us fail to realize that... :?

I'm still an advocate that people are people...and that trying to divide the two genders isn't the best solution. I've met too many men and women who do not fit into these sterotypes at all...myself included. :roll:

My one "fault" in romantic situations is that I tend to be too honest and to the point. This gets me in trouble when I tell someone exactly what I think when asked...sometimes the truth is hard to bear...especially when it is spurned for a long time... :oops:

SG

[MacMoto]

... So SG, I take you've given up lurking then :wink:

[peachexploration]

....Mind games and innuendo get old real fast... Quite true, SG. Quite true.


Cool, amazing what kind of conversation a joke can spark. :D

[pygmalion]

There's something to be said for honest, open communication. Mind games and innuendo get old real fast...it all has its time and place, but many of us fail to realize that... :?

I'm still an advocate that people are people...and that trying to divide the two genders isn't the best solution. I've met too many men and women who do not fit into these sterotypes at all...myself included. :roll:

My one "fault" in romantic situations is that I tend to be too honest and to the point. This gets me in trouble when I tell someone exactly what I think when asked...sometimes the truth is hard to bear...especially when it is spurned for a long time... :oops:

SG

Yup. Here's another conversation I've participated in, back before I gave up dumb mind games:

Me: Do you love me?

Him: I'm with you, aren't I? I take care of you. I go to work every day for US, don't I?

Um hello, dude. When I woman asks if you love her, there's one answer. "Yes." If your answer's not a direct yes, then the answer is no. Obviously, your actions (however laudable) didn't answer the question, or she wouldn't be asking. :roll:

Men!!! (Just kidding, SG. Men and women do the same stupid stuff, and I don't see either gender winning the prize for direct, honest communication. :? )

[peachexploration]

How ironic is this! I'm now watching Oprah. She has Greg Behrendt on her show tonight. The topic is "Confused about how a guy feels about you and what his conversations really mean". Greg is a former Sex and the City writer and co-author of "He's Just Not That Into You". I think I'm purchased that book. :wink: :lol: Alot of their comments and observations work both ways for men and women. She has some snippets of it at her site if you're interested. oprah.com :)

[pygmalion]

The funny thing is, the older I get, the less "into" guys I am. Once you survive your first monumental heartbreak, it gets easier. At least you know you'll live to see another day (and, quite possibly a new romance :wink: )

I'll have to check out those snippets. Thanks for the tip. 8)

[Sabor]

The funny thing is, the older I get, the less "into" guys I am.

oh!? swinging the other way perhaps :twisted:

[pygmalion]

Silly! No. I'm just not obsessed with their every thought, hoping for them to call, dressing especially to please them, etc. I used to do that. Not any more ... well except for that one special guy that I am crushing on, big time!! :wink: I just have to get the courage to tell him. :?

[danceguy]

Sabor! :doh: :eyebrow:

[MacMoto]

Not any more ... well except for that one special guy that I am crushing on, big time!! :wink: I just have to get the courage to tell him. :?
EM... oh never mind. Good luck and all the best. :wink:

She has some snippets of it at her site if you're interested. oprah.com :)
Interesting. Made me think. I'm not sure if I want anything to do with this whole dating game thing... :?

[peachexploration]

I'm with you on that Mac. Although, I don't think it's easier for any side these days. It got me thinking though about how maybe 100 years ago when dating was a little more scientific with the primary goal being ultimately to marry, not just date. Things like what kind of family people came from, community standing, source of wealth, family honor/name and to basically survive, etc., etc. A whole slew of items came before the concept of love or romance and usually your parents arranged the married. Not that these concepts don't matter today however but it seemed like it was little more cut and dry then. Any other thoughts?

[pygmalion]

Not any more ... well except for that one special guy that I am crushing on, big time!! :wink: I just have to get the courage to tell him. :?
EM... oh never mind. Good luck and all the best. :wink:



I was wondering if anyone would pick up on that comment. :wink: I have a couple subtle preliminary moves planned, but so far, nothing to tell. And you can rest assured that, the minute there's something to tell ... there's absolutely no way I'm posting it here. :wink: :lol: :lol:

[pygmalion]

I'm with you on that Mac. Although, I don't think it's easier for any side these days. It got me thinking though about how maybe 100 years ago when dating was a little more scientific with the primary goal being ultimately to marry, not just date. Things like what kind of family people came from, community standing, source of wealth, family honor/name and to basically survive, etc., etc. A whole slew of items came before the concept of love or romance and usually your parents arranged the married. Not that these concepts don't matter today however but it seemed like it was little more cut and dry then. Any other thoughts?

Very interesting, peach. I've been thinking about my reply since yesterday. Here's my thought. Dating these days is really complicated, but, from a woman's perspective, I'd rather have things the way they are now.

A hundred years ago, the clear objective was marriage, yes. But, once married, women were chattel. They sometimes found love or romance. And they sometimes found physical abuse. They had no recourse, and no means of escape.

Yup. Finding a mate was a lot simpler. But somehow I think that finding a loving, caring mate has always been difficult, with a big portion of your fate left up to chance.

What do you think?

[peachexploration]

Oh sure, Pygmalion. Absolutely right. It is much easier now to "date" in the respect that women (and men) in this country generally now have choices or the "say" in whom they want to spend their time with. Dating could successfully go on endlessly for years. But 100 years ago that was close to not an option. The main reason for dating was to marry and survive and hopefully you would "grow" to love the other. Then, your family, society, circumstances etc. chose the date (courting) for you which probably didn't last more than a couple of years if that. Gosh, could you imagine an agreement between families that you marry their son or daughter before you are even born? *shudder* That's scary. It was less about love, attraction, romance or passion and more about everything else. Love was taken out of the equation most of the time. Now, you have the option of searching for your true love. But what's difficult about that? For me, it would be the pain of going through the duds even when your priority is not necessarily to marry. Some people are lucky by finding that one (or a few :lol: ) early. Alot of us aren't in this day and age even when we have all those options (speaking of myself of course). The other big difference is that marriages lasted longer. Now, that's because of a whole slew of reasons including the ones in regards to women. We just didn't have the rights as we do today. So, we have those options now and still have our woes with relationships. That's Just my opinion but I definitely agree with you, I'd rather be here now than there 100 years ago even though it was a little more cut and dry. It would be pretty weird having a guy say to my father, "Sure I'd court your daughter but you also have to give me and my family ten goats as her dowry. :lol: :) Wait, at least I'd know I was worth something.... :lol: :lol: :lol:

[pygmalion]

You're worth a heck of a lot more than ten goats! :wink: :D