View Full Version : Maintaining eye contact
Hi, everyone,
I find that when I dance with taller guys in open position, in order to have eye contact with them, I need to raise my head and look up, does this sound right? It looks a bit unnatural, not to mention my neck get stiff after a while. In closed position, I just ignore eye contact altogether b/c we're too closed and raise my head is a little awkward. I have no problem dancing with people my height because I can just look at them straight in the eyes.
Any suggestions?
Thanks.
Sabor
06-20-2005, 05:37 AM
actually i'm in favor of not maintaining eye contact cause i think it would be creepy actually .. but then again i'm strictly a social dancer .. i like looking freely in general/or specific depending .. but never staring or focussing on just one area.. at my partner and kind of keep it natural ..
those who go in the dance thinking that by maintaing a gaze to my eyes cause that what they've been taught or told i'd probably get red faced from trying to hold back laughing outloud :lol: .. sorry but i find robotic behavior funny.. feel it dont memorize it.. but thats just moi
Kuriin
06-20-2005, 11:24 AM
I never stare in people's eyes unless asked to by a teacher or choreographer. I just can't. I was raised to believe (my own morals) where looking in the eyes is very rude, just as rude as pointing a finger.
Eye contact or lack thereof is often related to culture. In certain cultures direct eye contact is a mark of respect and in others it is defiantly disrespectful - especially where there is an age difference. Its hard to break through that taboo if you were brought up that way.
hopelessly_addicted
06-20-2005, 11:52 AM
I don't think height different should make any impact on the eye contact. I agree with sabor that constant stare could be creepy. It depends on how it's done, but eye contact made at the right moments can be tantalising though...
Urmmm I can understand how making eye contact can be difficult due to the way people are brought up, but I do find it extremely distracting when the partners I dance with have those "wandering eyes". Puts me off majorly...
Hey, H_A, thanks! I've found a couple of really good threads on DF about eye contacts, I think I'll try it out tonight on some unsuspecting victims :lol: ! I guess I"m just shy and feel awkward when it comes to eye contacts but I think I just need a little practice to flush out the shyness... Yes, the "wandering eyes" business definately has to go!!
P.S. My instructor told me if I'm uncomfortable, I can always look at his chest/whereever my eye level is as opposed to having eye contact, what do you think of that?
Wish me luck!
Ms_Sunlight
06-20-2005, 12:36 PM
lynn, I think that one probably works better if it's the male that is taller than the female. We get enough guys looking at our chests as it is!
lynn, I think that one probably works better if it's the male that is taller than the female. We get enough guys looking at our chests as it is!
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
hadn't thought about that.....oh, no, that reminds me of a guy in my AT class......
Stiletto One
06-20-2005, 11:21 PM
For competition purposes, locking eyes is an effective way of keeping the connection (at least in parts where I'm supposed to be looking at my partner). Social dancing, sometimes I look into my partners' eyes, sometimes not.
tacad
06-20-2005, 11:28 PM
I really enjoy the locking eyes, even in social dancing. Well, it depends on who it is. :lol: Most social dancers I've seen don't like this. But from time to time it's great, with the right person.
whew...i think i've gone through every old thread on df about eye contact. :D I think the main point of eye contact is to maintain communication, especially when physical contact isn't available. Ahem...mayb "locking eyes" is a little too much for me now :wink: , i think i'll start with just "casual eye contact".....
Just out of curiosity, how are you suppose to maintain eye contact in smooth & standard when you're practically "glued together" with the ladies and the gentlemen each facing different side?? My instructor told me to look over the man's right shoulder. He said if I tilt my head to the right side, my body direction will move to the right as well, which is bad. So basically, no eye contact at all??
tacad
06-20-2005, 11:49 PM
You're right. You don't. And you crash into someone if you do. But for rhumba, cha cha you do, or so I'm taught.
Occasional eye contact is fine for Latin dances.
For Ballroom, and the rest of the time in Latin, I'd rather have you looking out for other couples so we don't prang.
Edit: Besides, you should be looking in the direction in which I've led you to look. :D
Sabor
06-21-2005, 07:18 AM
yeah like whatever floats your boat.. extremes aint cool either way..
hey, i mean sometimes with some ladies i like to maintain lip contact instead :lol:
You're right. You don't. And you crash into someone if you do. But for rhumba, cha cha you do, or so I'm taught.
That's what I thought, I'm surprised that some ppl mentioned in previous threads that they were able to manitain eye contact in smooth/standards!
hey, i mean sometimes with some ladies i like to maintain lip contact instead :lol:
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Wouldn't you crash into other couples along the way??
Sagitta
06-21-2005, 09:14 AM
hey, i mean sometimes with some ladies i like to maintain lip contact instead :lol:
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Wouldn't you crash into other couples along the way??
Nope. I done that before. :wink: :)
Nope. I done that before. :wink: :)
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
I bet "multi-tasking" must be on your resume!!
Sabor
06-21-2005, 10:51 AM
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
tacad
06-21-2005, 04:02 PM
:lol: :lol: :lol: :rocker:
fascination
08-30-2005, 04:07 PM
i have found that sometimes the eye contact thing easily leads to the lip contact thing 8)
Vince A
08-30-2005, 04:07 PM
I look into their eyes . . . it's polite . . . it's connection . . . it's flirting.
One look into these eyes, and they're hypnotized, mesmerized . . . they're all mine . . .
But don't tell my wife, eh??? :wink:
i have found that sometimes the eye contact thing easily leads to the lip contact thing 8)
if I'd to that my gf would kill me. At least i hope she would. :D
lip contact just with my gf, eye contact in the best case with every follower
luh
kdogg
08-30-2005, 04:15 PM
i have found that sometimes the eye contact thing easily leads to the lip contact thing 8)
Are you talking about me? Just kidding. :lol: :lol:
kdogg
08-30-2005, 04:35 PM
Hey, H_A, thanks! I've found a couple of really good threads on DF about eye contacts, I think I'll try it out tonight on some unsuspecting victims :lol: ! I guess I"m just shy and feel awkward when it comes to eye contacts but I think I just need a little practice to flush out the shyness... Yes, the "wandering eyes" business definately has to go!!
P.S. My instructor told me if I'm uncomfortable, I can always look at his chest/whereever my eye level is as opposed to having eye contact, what do you think of that?
Wish me luck!
Yeah, you got to watch out for those vagabond eyes. Your instructor must be pretty proud of his hairy chest. I blush when I keep my eye level to the chest of the girl I dance with. I would rather look at her eyes; eyes are pretty expressive, they tell stories. I guess that's why romantic poets write a lot about it.
kdogg
08-30-2005, 04:40 PM
I look into their eyes . . . it's polite . . . it's connection . . . it's flirting.
One look into these eyes, and they're hypnotized, mesmerized . . . they're all mine . . .
But don't tell my wife, eh??? :wink:
Too late, Vince. DF's inform-your-spouse-if-something-fishy-is-going-on alarm already went off. You better order some red roses. :lol: :wink:
fascination
08-30-2005, 04:54 PM
hey I'm with vince...we married folks have to get our thrills
Vince A
08-30-2005, 05:19 PM
She knows I'm a big flirt . . . I'm Italian, what do you want . . . and she gets flowers all the time . . . for absolutely no reason.
Besides . . . she was sitting beside me when I wrote that!!!!
Vince A
08-30-2005, 05:20 PM
hey I'm with vince...we married folks have to get our thrills
I'll drink to that!!!!
Hey, H_A, thanks! I've found a couple of really good threads on DF about eye contacts, I think I'll try it out tonight on some unsuspecting victims :lol: ! I guess I"m just shy and feel awkward when it comes to eye contacts but I think I just need a little practice to flush out the shyness... Yes, the "wandering eyes" business definately has to go!!
P.S. My instructor told me if I'm uncomfortable, I can always look at his chest/whereever my eye level is as opposed to having eye contact, what do you think of that?
Wish me luck!
Yeah, you got to watch out for those vagabond eyes. Your instructor must be pretty proud of his hairy chest. I blush when I keep my eye level to the chest of the girl I dance with. I would rather look at her eyes; eyes are pretty expressive, they tell stories. I guess that's why romantic poets write a lot about it.
:lol:
"And if i'm not looking at your eyes - i obviously don't want a comment on it" - do you know that t-shirt? saw someone running around with that shirt on a dance night. thought it was to write it down :P
luh
Sabor
08-31-2005, 05:20 AM
i dont care what contacts with what.. it depends on .. i'll see whats most nice on her and engage it lol
cornutt
09-02-2005, 02:29 PM
One problem with maintaining eye contact is that, in order to do that, the taller partner has to look down -- and that puts the head weight forward. In most Latin and ballroom dancing, you need to work on keeping your head weight back. Also, if you are constantly looking at your partner, your head can get turned in the wrong direction. For example, when in promenade position, you need to be looking in the direction that your arms are pointing, not at your partner. (Consider that in ECS, for example, you are in promenade most of the time... I got corrected on that in our lesson this week.)
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