Feel like a Buffoon.

[danceguy]

Hi Everyone,

After going out dancing tonight, I had an eye opening experience that has changed my perception of dance, myself and what my goals really are.
There are two main dance schools in my area, and tonight I attended a dance at another school that I've only been to once before, and have never taken lessons there. Here I was thinking...man, I've been working my butt off to learn a lot of dance...so I'll get out there and cut a rug, right? Well, not exactly...I did quite allright and had fun...but talk about feeling embrassed! :oops:

All I can say is...my stars do I feel like I've learned so little these past few months! I saw one particular lady again who knew less than I did the first time I met her...and tonight...she was dancing way beyond my current level...man did she look good on the dance floor! I was amazed and impressed...jealous even (I'll admit it), but this really caused me to look at all I've learned.

I just watched the teachers...talked with them...and it made me realize that this school has what I'm looking for. But I feel like the past 5 months have taught me so little. This other teacher explained (and I knew without asking) that I'd have to start at the bottom in his classes...which is obviously where I need to be. :?

In a continuation of my "aching shoulder" thread...I have to ask again, is this a common thing for a dancer to go through? While I still intend to go to more dancing events outside of classes...man on man do I need to sharpen my skills!

The blindfolds are off, and I'm seeing with new eyes...finally... :shock:

Best,

SG

[SDsalsaguy]

I've been there too...had those "what the heck have I been doing?" moments. One of mine was the first time I took a semi-private lesson with my current coach...I'd been dancing on a DanceSport formation team for two years, was the co-captain of it at the time, and found out that I hadn't even known the correct alignments for some basic figures! Talk about an eye opener!

I've also seen people who started out with me or even soon after me who had just more natural talent and ability shoot right past me...and, as much as I am happy for them, there is also a part of me that gets jealous too. I mean if they were putting in more work and effort, well then, that's on me, right? But when it just comes to them? Or, more in line with your scenario, when they get taken under the wing of a really good dancer and so just have this huge leg up? Again, I don't begrudge them the opportunity but it is hard, at least at times, not to be a bit jealous.

In your case though, I also think that it's great that you now know what you want and where you can get it. Best of luck and keep us posted...

[pygmalion]

Oh SG. I feel for you. These reality checks can be so painful, can't they?

I've had them, too. Like the first time I went to a salsa club after taking months of salsa lessons. Eek! Or the first time a took a lesson with my current coach. :x Or the time I got my samba critique (see samba thread) Ugh! Or the first time I went to a non-studio public ballroom dance. Yikes! All times when I realized how far I had to go to reach my goals. It's not easy to have that realization. And I'm sure there are more to come. *shrug*


Here are a couple things to think about, though. Five months is not a long time to be studying any new discpline. But in five months, you have learned a bunch of patterns in several dances. You're aware of lead and follow concepts that many people NEVER learn. And that's a heck of a lot for five months, just in case you don't know.

AND you have the humility to use this experience as a motivator. A lot of people are either oblivious to how bad they are (and therefore never get better) or they get discouraged and quit. It sounds like you don't plan to do either one. So look out! Another couple months and you'll be looking back on this day and thinking, "Wow! I've come so far. :D " Believe me. You will. :D

[Swing Kitten]

What a valueable experience you've had! ....and it sounds like you'll make the most of it.

Elsewhere I have talked about depth and breadth. You've gotten a great start on your breadth and breadth of course takes time and it is not fair to yourself to compare yourself to someone who perhaps has been working on depth but could lack great breadth. Does this make sense? I'm not sure how well I'm expressing this idea.

[pygmalion]

Swing Kitten makes a couple good points. First, breadth takes a long time. I have friends who only do salsa, who started after I did, who dance a lot less than I do, and who are still much better at salsa than I. But they can't waltz, or hustle, or tango, or lots of other stuff I can do.

Also, it's not fair to yourself to compare yourself with others. Period. Why? 1. They may look a lot better to you, sitting on the sidelines, than they actually are. 2. In this particular case, they were in a familiar environment, and you were in a new environment. That does impact your dancing ability, at least for the night. 3. You were probably watching people who've been dancing a month or two, but you were also watching people who've been dancing ten years or more, in all likelihood. How is it fair to compare yourself to them? Hmm? 4. People learn at different rates. Some have an instinctive feel for a particular dance. Some have previous ballet, jazz, tap, or musical experience. Some people are naturally just good at it. And lots of other stuff could come into play. Playing the comparison game is a great way to discourage yourself, unless you're comparing yourself against what you used to be able to do, or what you feel you have the potential to do.

Hope all this makes sense. :D


Jenn

[youngsta]

scorpion you definitely aren't alone in this experience. When I started learning salsa over a year ago I was improving at an amazing rate. After about 3 months I was always the best guy dancer in every group class. The timing came easy to me, my lead was respectable, and my cuban motion came naturally. The problem is I'd never stepped into a club at this point.

RUDE AWAKENING!

I finally decided to meet some people at the club after the class and that's where it hit me. I had no floorcraft whatsoever. I couldn't remember how to execute half the moves I'd learned in class. I was concentrating so hard on execution my partners always made comments about me never smiling. It wasn't pretty to say the least! :lol: And don't even make me tell you about my first visit to L.A. 2 months later! Complete ego check.

Ever since then I've ALWAYS kept that same sense of humility I learned from those experiences. Other than the instructors in this area (Denver) I am probably one of the best male salsa dancers in the scene...but only the regulars know because I carry myself with the same open, non-assuming attitude that my two humbling experiences taught me.

Keep this feeling and use it to catapult you to whatever levels you aspire to reach with your dancing!!

[Sarah]

All I can say is...my stars do I feel like I've learned so little these past few months!


I think you've learned plenty in the last five months - you've learned some basic steps, a bit about leading, a bit about following[1] and how to recognise good instruction when you see it!
Enjoy your new school, and may you find some new followers who's grace and skill make your heart ache more than your shoulder ;).

Cheers
Sarah


[1]how not to :D

[Sagitta]

I agree...I've slammed into those wake-up call reality checks myself all too often, especially as I have started dancing only recently and am going for the breadth vs depth approach right now...You're definitely not alone SG. Here's my tale for swing dance:

I just started dancing swing at this internet cafe this summer, after learning some swing a couple months before, and while I was great in class I found that the club experience was a completely different bear from my Spring dance classes. In addition, this swing place predominantly did lindy while I only had some east coast swing under my belt! (As it was the only place in town that does swing I really did not have much of a choice. And my dance teacher also had recommended this place to dance swing socially!!)

I eventually realized there was no point in beating myself over the head with how bad I was...it was not doing anyone any good...I simply was inexperienced and a beginner... :doh: So I would go to the ladies with a smile, ask to dance, and they graciously tolerated this "jitterbug" as I struggled my way into lindy! Then there was this couple that came in without a clue about dancing. I showed the lady what I knew (charleston steps in ECS), and a month later she and her leader were grooving to lindy while I was still slowly moving from the basic charleston steps that I learnt in ECS to feeling my way through the lindy swing out. :shock: :oops:

Everyone is different. As long as you go out and have a good time, don't act as if you know more then you do, know where you are and where you want to be, and make some progress, it's all good. 8) And you definitely are chugging along on that track SG. You'll pretty soon pull into one of those stations where things just click. That's where I am in zydeco right now. Enjoying the rest-stop before the reality train blows it's warning bell that it is time to climb back on aboard and make some more progress on my zydeco trip.

[danceguy]

Thank you for the words of encouragement everyone. This whole experience has really given me a lot to think about over the weekend...just going over all that I had encountered the other night. I also should mention that most of the people I danced with were assistant instructors (who could really dance!)...so I was a little intimidated about that. Thankfully...they were very supportive...and the feedback I received was so very subtle...and they only made comments when I asked. As most of you mentioned in your experiences...I had so many more moves to draw upon...but I just couldn't get them to come out on the dance floor! :oops:

Elsewhere I have talked about depth and breadth. You've gotten a great start on your breadth and breadth of course takes time and it is not fair to yourself to compare yourself to someone who perhaps has been working on depth but could lack great breadth. Does this make sense? I'm not sure how well I'm expressing this idea.

This makes a lot of sense to me...for I have become a jack of all dances and not really skilled at any. Another factor...is that I have only taken a few classes that were focused on only one dance (ECS, Rumba, and now Lindy)...and rest have all been combo classes, like S, CC, R or W, FT, ECS. While this gives a student breadth...the depth is sorely lacking, especially if you do not apply yourself. That's why I found myself struggling in class the other day...being in an int level class where the students still stare at their feet, don't hold their frame and their timing is off? From what I've seen in this new school...you don't advance until you have the skills required to go to the next level...and that's the way it should be!

But on the other hand...I had wanted to learn about dance...so I jumped in feet first (bad pun, couldn't resist!) and tried as many as I could. I've come to the conclusion that I really want to focus on a few...and the rest...well...I'll leave those for another time. There is a lot of overlapping in the styles I've studied and it has been a lot of fun these past few months. And all those years of music theory and playing music has given me an inside edge...but I must put it to better use. :o

So instead of giving up...I've been inspired to try that much harder!

Onward and upward (plus a little side to the side).

SG

8)

[SDsalsaguy]

Glad to hear that everything seems to be on track for you SG.

I was talking to msc earlier tonight and it triggered a memory of one of my "buffoon" moments... I think I'd been taking salsa classes for a couple of months and some fellow students and I headed down to an outdoor salsa festival we heard about. So here I am, at my first salsa festival, with a couple of months of ballroom studio salsa under my belt... honestly, I have never felt so "white" in my whole life!

In a similar vein, I think I completed about 6 months of before I was willing to venture onto the social floor at the local salsa clubs... only to then need to take the next 6 months learning how to dance club style salsa!

[Danish Guy]

So instead of giving up...I've been inspired to try that much harder!

Yeahh Go Go Go 8)

[MissAlyssa]

We (instructors) aren't kidding when we say it will take a lot of time to get "good" huh? :] I'm glad you are still going to be dancing and putting in the effort!