Caring about other dancers' opinions

[fascination]

and it doesn't mean you have to be cynical or hardened, just wise and restrained

[bordertangoman]

Originally Posted by dancethrustorms

How much should you take into consideration what other dancers say about you? I'm trying out for school dance company in a month but I'm really nervous because I hear all the things that those girls say about each other. That's honestly the thing that makes me most nervous about trying out, I don't want to be the girl they're talking about. I've only been dancing for 2 years and most have them have A LOT more experience.

its tricky; but the best attitude is dont care a button dont care a fig; one person in particular has spread some defamatory remarks about me as a teacher, to people I was teaching, but most of those who know me well enough know its bull ***.

so I don't care "a button I dont care a fig"

[3wishes]

Welcome DanceThruStorms - love the name. My thought comes from family experience with try outs for dance school and afterwards of the kids, teens, young adults etc. all family members. First, previous post replies are excellent. Second, if there is a dancer you yourself look up to and the conversation is a focus on improvement - that is different from "gossip" that can be hurtful/harmful. Every dancer is different - embrace this. Every dancer, as an individual brings their strengths and character to the try out and beyond. Also, hold fast that if the dance school try out does not go as you hoped - it will give you something to work towards. Dance is a continual work in progress, be it a school try out or otherwise. Enjoy the process and take pride in the things you do well applying them to the try out and the things you will work on for improvement. This is yours, for you, and you control only yourself (refer back to Fascination post).

[Joyful Dancer]

Just my 0.02..... it has been my experience that if what folks are saying (in life, as well as dance) is mean spirited and "gossipy" that most likely "they" are the ones with a problem (low self image, lack of motivation etc) and they can only feel better by talking down about you/others.

[jerseydancer]

agree with all the posts. think about this, if we really care about what other people say about us that much, we probably would never start dancing at the first place.

[Br0nze]

I think it depends on the level of the other dancer and if the opinion is asked for or simply volunteered. If they are dedicated and hard working and know "a thing or two" about what they are talking about, and their criticism is constructive, then it's worth taking into consideration. If it's meant out of spite, however, then what's the use in paying attention to it?

It's difficult not to let the opinions of others get to you, or be bothered by it even a little, but it is important to always separate personal attacks from general observations and criticism for one's own good. Always keep in mind who the person is, where they are coming from and why they might say what they said.

[jerseydancer]

Originally Posted by Br0nze

I think it depends on the level of the other dancer and if the opinion is asked for or simply volunteered. If they are dedicated and hard working and know "a thing or two" about what they are talking about, and their criticism is constructive, then it's worth taking into consideration. If it's meant out of spite, however, then what's the use in paying attention to it?

It's difficult not to let the opinions of others get to you, or be bothered by it even a little, but it is important to always separate personal attacks from general observations and criticism for one's own good. Always keep in mind who the person is, where they are coming from and why they might say what they said.

that is true, but i think a safer bet is to work on this with your dance teacher. the other dancers do not know where do you stand in your training program, and what do you work on. it may too early or even too damaging to pay attention at certain skills before your body is ready.

[jjs914]

Originally Posted by Br0nze

Always keep in mind who the person is, where they are coming from and why they might say what they said.

I think these are wise words for dance and for life.

[jwlinson]

You know what they say opinions are like.... and everyone has one.

Everyone will have an opinion about something you're doing / not doing. Take each with a grain of salt, and only care about the ones coming from people who count.