OK, Installment #2: Being heavy v. giving energy back to the lead. This started at the very beginning of the lesson, when I was VERY nervous. And, when I'm very nervous, I have a very difficult time connecting with my partner. It just takes me a while to relax and settle into the embrace and become comfortable. So, the comment was that he was not feeling the connection enough from me--that the connection wasn't solid. So they were talking about having me establish a bit more pressure through the connection. Resistance?, I asked. They don't like the term resistance--they prefer to explain it as matching the energy established in the embrace by the man. It's hard to explain, but much easier to feel as an explanation. Basically, when he established a very "firm" embrace, with strong intention (not rigid), I was to match it. If the embrace was softer, or more hesitant, I was to back off a bit on the connection. Still have a connection, but not use the same amount of forward energy. We just stood there alternating between them for a while, which was interesting. Like I said, hard to explain, much easier to feel. In matching his resistance through this, I felt like I was giving a lot more energy/pressure than I was used to. (At this point he'd stopped playing with the embrace, and was back to his normal one.) I told them this, and asked about the risk of becoming a heavy follower. He evidently understood enough english to know what I was saying, because the response was a very immediate NO. They explained that with with my energy/intention matched to his, and the resulting firm connection, that it made for a lighter follower, since it allowed for more subtle leading and easier detection of the leads.