RE: HI Blondie, Well first I'd like to say that whoever told you that TKD is not a martial art has demonstrated they don't know fully what Martial Arts is all about. First the term Martial Art in itself means Warfare Art. TKD was created during the Japanese occupation of Korea during WW2 and the Koreans created it to basically have a way of defending themselves w/hand to hand combat. Anyway sorry about but I had to correct that since I get very touchy when people debate what is and isn't a Martial Art. As for a Martial Arts that doesn't concern punching or kicking, I'd recommend TAI CHI to you. Tai Chi is infact a Martial Art in case anybody says otherwise. Its just that you will have an extremely had time finding a good Tai Chi instructor since Tai Chi is mostly used as a relaxation sort of thing these days. It doesn't involved kicking or punching and relies on circular soft energy to fight back. The truth is however, I doubt you'll find a school that still teaches the combative aspects of TAI CHi and even if you find one, it'll take you about 30 years to learn correctly. If you are looking to the Martial Arts as a way of self-defense in a shorter amount of time, there isn't any way around not punching and kicking. The closes I think you'll get to what your asking about is Aikido. Although Aikido does have some strikes and what not...it stresses mostly on redirecting your opponents energy against them. I hope this helps!