General Dance Discussion > Crush on Instructor...

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by summer280, Oct 1, 2006.

  1. danceronice

    danceronice Well-Known Member

    *gag* Tim Hortons uber alles, Starbucks in a pinch, Dunkin...only if there's no other alternative. And probably not even then.
     
  2. It's me.

    It's me. Member

    There's no emotion of my side, as he's not the guy that I could be with. If he isn't that well because of me, it's his own problem and I don't care. The truth is that I 'm paying him and them to learn dance and I also pay them over the parties. And everything ends there. It's a service that they offer. Nothing else, nothing more and nothing less. I could make many friends over the parties, but a friend can't be someone that I pay. So these people will be other students who are not involved in anything else and we are in the same side of the coin! And if it wasn't him, there would be another one, as I'm in love with dance and not with him.
     
    Larinda McRaven likes this.
  3. sbrnsmith

    sbrnsmith Well-Known Member

    Seems like a complete 180 degree turn on your part- from posting 7 days ago that you have a crush, to now when you feel nothing. Realizing every person is different, however, can a crush end so completely in just 7 days...
    In any case- great for you, and good luck with your dancing!
     
    It's me., Loki and fascination like this.
  4. Loki

    Loki Well-Known Member

    There used to be a bullet list somewhere titled "is it love or just infatuation?" Sounds trite but I found it to be a pretty accurate gauge of emotions (in my younger days).
     
    It's me. likes this.
  5. snapdancer

    snapdancer Well-Known Member

  6. RiseNFall

    RiseNFall Well-Known Member

    Off topic, but from the above link I found myself doing a little bit of internet surfing procrastination and yes, I clicked on the "which disney princess are you?" link. I bombed out on the first question, "what is your favorite subject in school." Hands down, it was math, which wasn't even listed. :mad: Last time I try to get personal insight from Seventeen magazine….
     
  7. danceronice

    danceronice Well-Known Member

    Rofl, had to go take that--it's better than BuzzFeed's as I'm CLEARLY Belle and I never get her on theirs.
     
  8. It's me.

    It's me. Member

    I have never told that I am totally in love or something, I was definitely sure from the very beginning, that it is a crush. And crush doesn't mean butterflies in your stomach. It means that for unexpected reasons I find someone attractive and on the specific period of time that has nothing that I could be impressed or try to have in my life. That's why it 's curious and for sure pointless. Crush means at first "Why?" and on the other hand "What if it doesn't pass?". Today I sent a normal message to him just to ask for the party and he was waiting for something more of me to say. That's at least pathetic.
     
  9. sbrnsmith

    sbrnsmith Well-Known Member

    I never said you were in love....I'm talking about crushes...yes, a crush is pointless...and I would rather avoid it, but also, a crush can be very strong....I wish I could turn it around in 7 days to where I no longer care about the guy, but it's not the same for everyone....every person is different.....I am so glad for you that you are able to move on, with no distress on your end. I wish the same could be said of everyone.
     
    It's me. likes this.
  10. It's me.

    It's me. Member

    If it's pointless, just get over it and don't let it become stronger. If it's something important that you 'll never find again , go for it. But, I still can't be sure why it happens... It's not just that the other person is paying attention to you, neither the contact. Cause I have all these in my life with other guys... It's the birth of the sexuality that the dance brings...
     
  11. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    It's me. likes this.
  12. Partner Dancer

    Partner Dancer Well-Known Member

    Does it really matter in this day and age? One sees couples get together
    in the dance scene anywhere from days to years, and some make it to
    marriage and most don't. Even the married ones may split down the road.
    There are just too many complexities in relationships these days.

    So, why is important that one makes a distinction between infatuation and
    love? I suspect in the end it's just some aspect of ROI (return on
    investment), where one doesn't want to feel foolish about devoting
    energy into something that isn't reciprocated at about the same degree.
    Other people simply can't assess what a particular person feels and wants,
    because emotions and values are very personal (and usually changes
    over time with experience anyway). More importantly, what the other
    person feels and wants is a big unknown in the equation.

    Dance scenes allow individuals to come in contact with many people of
    the gender of attraction, so one can have the chance to figure
    things out for oneself. Some people end up getting involved with other
    dancers and some choose to look outside.
     
    It's me. likes this.
  13. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I think the only real thing worth noting is that many students who would not otherwise be looking, may find themselves experiencing these emotions and not realizing that, whatever the degree, it is very common and highly unlikely to be mutual...I think if most students were able to go into the situation knowing that, we would have much less of these sorts of posts...and yet it simply isn't plausible for a studio to issue that sort of forewarning
     
  14. FoxTrotExtrovert

    FoxTrotExtrovert Active Member

    Why thank you! :D
     
    It's me. likes this.
  15. twnkltoz

    twnkltoz Well-Known Member

    How about a sign at the registration desk that says, "Warning! Dance can be highly addictive. Additionally, you may experience romantic feelings for your instructor, because they are amazing, god-like beings. However, rest assured your affections will not be returned. Except perhaps if you bring baked goods, but you must bring enough for everybody."
     
    It's me. and Mr 4 styles like this.
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    lol...well, in all honesty, I have seen students fall for pros who fall considerably below the bar of godly in both looks, behavior, and skill...though most of them do seem to warm considerably to a good pie...on a serious note though, I imagine it would not be a wise business practice to issue any such caution....but I think a good teacher should always do everything they can to discourage what begins to be a clearly developing inappropriate level of attachment...it's a tough line though, given the implications at the wallet
     
    It's me., Hedwaite and IndyLady like this.
  17. twnkltoz

    twnkltoz Well-Known Member

    It's true. And some people do not take rejection well, so it's a balance of heading off any advances without offending them so they stop taking lessons.

    That's the nice thing about most of my business being wedding couples and single women. I don't usually have that problem!
     
    It's me. likes this.
  18. Loki

    Loki Well-Known Member

    Yes, indeed, although the skill level was pretty good IMO. Maybe just the typical attraction to the alpha male of the pack.

    "After a certain point, money means nothing. It's all about the POWER."
     
    It's me. likes this.
  19. It's me.

    It's me. Member

    Dance awakes feelings, while power awakes women's feelings.
     
  20. Hedwaite

    Hedwaite Well-Known Member

    Well, at any rate, look at all the attention you've gotten for your crush right here. You haven't even had the need to contribute to any other threads across the forums.
     

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