Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by pygmalion, Feb 6, 2004.
Uh oh! I am a laughing woman. :shock: :lol:
I'm new here, so I'm catching up. This has been a very interesting read. Hopefully I'll have time to reply to some of the very thoughtful comments here.
Hi Vita Rara. Welcome to DF!
I wish it were that easy Sagitta, but for some reason it makes me hesitant. It's like I don't want to spoil my one haven. I don't know...still soooooo confused! :lol:
care to explain this a little further?
why would anyone want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't laugh!?
Then, we might as well make it three!
Well I would like to think that the people at df are a unique bunch!!
Hi Neil! Welcome.
I see the wink, so you were just kidding, right? I've been married over twenty years to a great dancer who would like to partner with me for more serious training, but I've found that I much better tolerate a girl being frustrated and irritable when I know that it's going to be over soon and I wont see her again until the next day. By then, I'm happy to see her.
Don't you find that people are more polite to complete strangers than they are to the people they care about most in the world? Once you know somebody well enough, you feel like you can dispense with the pleasantries and formalities, and just be yourself.
Thanks for the welcome guys. I agree that the people here seem to be unique.
Hmm. There are a couple older threads on that -- dance partners to whom you're married. I'll see if I can find one. There were different views -- some people who are both dance and life partners, and some who prefer to keep the two separate. It was interesting to see both views. To each his own.
Do you guys feel that this thread doesn't apply to married couples? I think that married couples need to find love and romance on the dance floor too. I can only speak for my wife since I don't know other women that well, but she needs to be seduced to get in the mood for the kind of love that I want. That means, I need to take her out dancing, talk to her, flirt with her, pay lots of attention to her, and then gradually work things toward the bedroom where the intensity can build. It's kind of like the movie Fifty First Dates.
As far as jealousy goes, I would be very happy if another guy is willing and able to do some of my work for me and get her warmed up for my benefit. I'm even willing to return the favor if he has a wife who would like some attention on the dance floor too. I don't think it takes anything away from our relationship, to the contrary, I think it enhances it. A lot of men who find this inappropriate for married couples don't see anything wrong with having strippers at his bachelor party or looking at porn. Dancing is like porn for women, and if I give the girl the right lead and attitude, I'm her porn star.
It might not help if he dances too. My wife is a dancer, but that doesn't mean that I can ditch her to dance with other women. That used to be a problem because, at dance venues other than Salsa clubs, there are a lot more women who dance than men, and the women are very aggressive about asking men to dance. I don't want to be rude, so I say yes, but my wife doesn't ask men to dance, so she ends up just sitting all night. So, now when women ask me to dance, I ask them if they have somebody to dance with my wife, or at least entertain her with good conversation.
I know quite a few married couples where the guy does not dance and the wife does and there is no problem with that. The husbands even sometimes come to the dances and just sit most of the time. I'm not too sure why I haven't seen the opposite situation. I can see how it can get frustrating for the wife is she loves dancing and does not get asked and her husband is out dancing with others a lot.
We started off dancing Lambada and then ballroom where the dance position consists of the women's crotch riding the man's right thigh the entire dance, so I can't think of anything I've ever seen on the dance floor that would be off-limits.
On the other hand, there are girls who are off-limits. It's the girls who flirt with guys a lot to get dances, but then ignore the guys' wives. The married women in our group hate that. If the girl has a husband who is a great dancer and dances with all the wives, then the girl is forgiven, but, if she shows up empty handed, then the wives forbid their husbands to dance with her.
I think that love and romances are ALWAYS ok... if you really fall in love with someone.
In this case it doesn´t matter who is this person... a teacher, a performers or anybody else...
If two people feel the same, who cares about who they are? :roll:
Sorry I haven´t read all the previous pages...
I agree with you Estella...if both people are feeling it strongly, then go for it I say. That's what life is all about!
I have an admission, Estella. I don't always go back and read the whole thread, either. And I'm a moderator, so I should be ashamed. :lol:
I agree. If both people feel it, they should handle the potential problems, then go for it.
I would like to add: as long as you're not hurting others in the process
True. I should have said that, SK. I guess I just don't think like that. Breaking up marriages or families is never okay in my book, so it never crossed my mind that my words might be interpreted that way.
So, if both people are free to pursue a relationship and both want to, go for it. :wink:
the play I'm working on deals with the issue so I suppose I have a heightened awarness of it.
... it's funny how the movie, "Shakespeare In Love" doesn't really touch on the fact that he abandoned his wife and three children!
-- the play I'm working on is fiction... yet that fact remains
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