Dancers Anonymous > Hate

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by dancer_of_god, Nov 9, 2003.

  1. dancer_of_god

    dancer_of_god New Member

    There is this forum that I go to for kids that went to a leadership conference this summer, like me. I saw an answer to a thread that got me thinking; what exactly is 'hate?' Do you think it's a state of mind, an overly-used word, or a strong and powerful emotion? Now, I don't want you to answer what people want to hear; answer from your past experiences or just from your gut feeling. While I'm at it, here's what I think.
    Hate, by definition, is to dislike intensly, or loathe. Quite true, but isn't it also a way of life? Is it not a complete and evolved culture? People live their lives according to hate; that's how things like 9/11 happened.
    Hate is a powerful word, isn't it? "I hate you" can have an intense impact on someone, whether you see it or not. Use it casually, it doesn't matter because it still hurts. Say it as a joke, they may take it seriously.
    Consider this: a little girl in a pink dress comes up to you on the street. You don't know her, and all she says is " I hate you". What would be going through your mind at this point? Would you just dismiss it as just a crazy kid thing, or something real? You my think you'd just ignore it, but no one can become immune to that type of thing.
    Hate is very real. What would you think if right now, I just said "I hate you"? What would you feel? Maybe it's a kid thing, but how can people hate so much in one day?

    "I hate my teacher"
    "I hate my parents"
    "I hate my life"
    "Everybody hates me"
    Let me ask you this: What did you notice about the statements above? Was it that each one included the words 'I' or'me'. What does this tell you?
  2. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    These are my thoughts as they come to me, unfiltered, straight from the neurons and firing synapses!!!!

    Emotions are a powerful thing. They can be used for good or evil. Look for the positives in people around you and the world seems a happier place. Look for the faults in people then the good in them gets hidden away. A sunny winter day can be freezing and make you miserable or you could be happy as it is so bright and cheerful. A gray winter morning could make you feel under the weather, or you coud enjoy the warmer weather brought about by the clouds trapping heat in the atmosphere.

    My co-workers can't stand one lady who works at our place. Could you use "hate" for their emotions...perhaps...Their attitude began to rub off on me...So, yes if you are surrounded by this culture of negativity, of which hate is part of, then you will be affected. But, this only happens if you allow yourself to be affected.

    I began not looking forward to work, like the others, particularly if I had to interact with this lady that we all now couldn't stand. Now I couldn't just quit my job, and work is a big part of my life. What a way to spend a big chunk of your life- miserable, hateful!!! So, I looked for the positives in this lady that we work with and whenever my co-workers started talking negatively about our co-worker (whom unfortunately I still don't think highly off) I turned the conversation to a more positive note and within a week the poisoned atmosphere in the workplace was gone. Now often when these other co-workers get worked up they come to me for a different perspective. I'm not saying that this always works, BUT we all are powerful effectors. We need to take charge of what we surround ourselves with in life, to the extent we can, and when we cannot avoid "hate", we need to be aware of it, and use it as a motivating effector for the positive.

    ...And since this is a dance forum...Someone agrees to dance with me but as we dance she just wants to stick to the basic. I could hate dancing with her, or perhaps I could enjoy doing the basic as well as I can, becoming one with the music, ensuring that my partner is enjoying the dance.

    After the first two sentences I did not need the third or fourth. That said it all...I'm sure most people have been there when they feel that the whole world is against them..."I" and "hate" caught my attention...
  3. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Hmm. Synapses firing here too. I think hate and love are both words that whose true significance is often lost in our society. The words are overused, so the underlying significance is often lost.

    I hate my teacher usually means my teacher did or expects something I don't like.
    I hate my parents usually means I'm angry or disappointed.
    I hate my life means there are some things I need to change.
    Everybody hates me means I feel lonely and friendless.
    But it can also mean a hate enough to hurt or kill. Same label for a bunch of different things.

    Hate and love are like curse words, which we often use when we're too lazy to find better, more descriptive words. We use hate and love as labels for lots of other lesser emotions.
  4. bouncybouncyweee

    bouncybouncyweee New Member

    I have issues with the word "hate" because it is so overused, and so childish seeming, and it really doesn't describe an emotion at all. It is a simple four letter word that doesn't convey an image or a feeling.

    Has anyone here seen the movie Waking Life? It was an independent film that, although it had a story line, was basically just drawings of many people have "philosophical" conversations. One of them had to do with the uncertainties and the drawbacks of language. For example, when I say the word "love", how am I to trust that you percieve that word the same as I do? There is no concrete definition for this word, it's all left up the imagination. It's the same with hate. I aviod using that word just because it is so abstract. I'd rather say "detest" (with has a hissing, spitting sound to it, and conveys a better image in my opinion) or even just go into more descriptive words to convey strong emotions.

    There are so many metaphors for love- it is a facination of the human mind. Just look at the song game thread! These metaphors seem to lack in the hate department sometimes. This leads me to wonder if perhaps more time should be invested in this said emtion, analysing it and it's origins and reasons. It can't and shouldn't be ignored or feared just because it is labeled as an adverse reaction. If we understood it more, perhaps we wouldn't throw the word around like a rag as much.
  5. dancer_of_god

    dancer_of_god New Member

    What you guys are writing is is good; a lot of adults I know aren't in touch with this sort of thing very much.

    9/11 was sad, but it was caused by hate, I think. The people of Iraq were so set in their ways, so hateful, that they tried to kill us. Even so, this wasn't a hate against one person, it was a huge hate against the USA.

    Although we think that we're innocent, we aren't. If you ask me, nobody's innocent. Even us kids aren't innocent, considering the fact that we grow up watching violent cartoons and hearing the word 'hate'.

    It's all around us, but we can change it, just like sagitta did. And it doesn't take much, either. A simple word of praise here, an easy handshake there, and this world could change. If you guys have looked at the thread about three wishes, a lot of people want world peace. I think we just need to learn to help ourselves.

    It's also that people think that they can't make a difference. No matter how many cute sayings you put on plaques and sell at gift shops, people still think that the are nobody. I'm not a motivational speaker, but I believe we can each do something about this hate.
  6. bouncybouncyweee

    bouncybouncyweee New Member

    I honestly think that what needs to be done about hate is not to eradicate it, but to understand it! I mean, it is almost undenaibly part of our human nature, why deney it's existance? Emotions are beautiful, and passion, whether deemed positive or negative, is interesting and is part what drives human kinds.

    I have in my room a poster of "what is love," a compilation of funny, interesting, profound and cynical views about that abstract word. Why isn't there one about hate? Seething emtion is what 'causes adverse actions, like 9/11. What if someone cared to discuss and understand the hate, instead of just keep it all hidden and suddenly have some outburst?
  7. borikensalsero

    borikensalsero Moderator

    Hate is just a word which our brian gives a meaning to. The word is nothing without the brain to process what you think of it.

    The entire world can sit there and tell me how much they hate me. Guess what? I'll be immune to it. Why? Because hate to me isn't my issue, but yours. I don't hate myself nor let hate be part of my world. I can see what people mean by it but it has no relevance in my world or what I think of myself. Someone else's words by no means have any kind of impact on me. Why? Because another's words have no impact on you unless you choose to let them impact you.

    To understand 9/11 we have to go far beyond hate. Hate is just a word to describe emotions. We must understand their history, not only of their lives but their values, and the values which that country was built up on. Their idea of what God is and how he carries out life. It is a simplistic view to attribute Hate to the power of 9/11. Remember that a word has no impact or meaning unless you let it have so. Just because I say I hate you, it doesn't mean that you have to take it as a stament against who you are. If you do, I have just strated my upper hand on you all while you think you are in control. In other words, I can brainwash you and you don't even know I am, all because you have chosen to react to my words instead of react to what you think of yourself, and understand that my hate reasons towards you have nothing to do with you, but how I view you, hence my self issues and not yours.
  8. bouncybouncyweee

    bouncybouncyweee New Member

    exactly borinkinsalsero! You don't try to ignore the "hate" but understand where and whence the idea may have come from!

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