General Dance Discussion > How do I get what I really want?

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by Sunsetdancer, Jan 25, 2017.

  1. Sunsetdancer

    Sunsetdancer Member

    Yes, DanceMentor,
    I like your comment. The more we learn and become adept, the needs and perhaps desires, change. That is one of the things I like the most of dance. It doesn't ever get old.
    But to be able to pinpoint something I have always wanted, and then begin to find it.....what a feeling!
  2. Sunsetdancer

    Sunsetdancer Member

    To Snapdancer,
    For those who are very happy with exactly what they have, the normal reasons people give may be enough. But I know for me, and some others I have spoken with, that there most always is something elusive that a dancer is aiming for; for me, I knew there had to be something more, but did not know what that would be. However, once it was presented to was one of the most exciting discoveries I have ever experienced. Art forms are an expression of something inside....that wants out. I knew my dancing was good - everyone said that I was a good social dancer.....but deep down, I knew that it wasn't REALLY good. It didn't look professional....and I did not like some of the professional dancing I had seen......didn't know what I wanted, or if it even existed. But I knew I FELT that there should be more. And there is. Now, my lessons have real meaning and direction.
  3. snapdancer

    snapdancer Well-Known Member

    If you want a discussion, start a thread on a specific issue rather than an equivalent to "Let's solve world hunger and find a cure for cancer." Or look through the threads on this forum where others discuss their specific issues.

    If your goal is some type of performance dancing to communicate with an audience, that's fine for you.

    But your characterization of social dancing as not "REALLY good" because it doesn't look professional misses the point of social dancing. Social dancing is not for an audience, it's for the dancers themselves. For example, I tagged along to an event my private instructor had at a nursing home with her youth ballroom class. I went from shuffling feet with an 87 year-old who had to sit down after 1/2 a song to dancing a tiny cha-cha with a 5 year-old. Neither of those dances looked professional or even rose to the level of "good" -- so what? My partners were happy to do it, and I was happy to do it on that occasional basis.

    If you want to look "professional" to an audience, then fine. Either hire a pro to help you fake your way through a showcase. Or go the longer route developing your own skills as a dancer, and seeking better instruction and traveling if necessary to find it.
    IndyLady likes this.
  4. Sunsetdancer

    Sunsetdancer Member

    Again, the discussion is not about me. But perhaps I can try to be more specific....

    When you (a person), attend a class, what specifically do you want from it? Why?
    What intrigues you about any studies you undertake? Perhaps you want to be a teacher or coach yourself. Why do you want to be a teacher or coach? Or why do you want to become a better social dancer. (By the way, I love social dancing. For me, it is a way to interact with friends while testing and practicing skills). How do various desires and personal goals change as you become a better dancer?
    When you attend a workshop, what specifically do you expect to gain from it? Do you just enjoy workshops or are they a good way to make new friends.
    When you seek out a coach, what are you looking for? Why? Do people have reasons for doing something? If you are already a champion, what do you look for in dance? What do you want out of it? Is it to win another title, or to become well known so you become more sought after as a coach? As a teacher, what do you look for in a student you want to teach. What about dance keeps you doing it year after year?
    When you look for a studio, what are you looking for? Is it because there just happens to be one in your neighborhood? Is it general, specific, just sounds like fun, do you have a goal, or are you just bored with life and want something new to do? Some say they want exercise, why choose dancing? Social dancing doesn't really give a whole lot of exercise. If you just want to have fun, what is it about dance that you think will be fun? Getting dressed up? Interaction with other people? Someplace to go? Skill? All of the above? The reason I may have been vague earlier is because I wanted a discussion, to hear the actual thoughts of others. So hopefully, this will stimulate ideas for the discussion. If it doesn't interest you, please do not feel obligated to comment.
  5. IndyLady

    IndyLady Well-Known Member

    tbh, in the time it would take me to respond to all those questions, I would be better off putting in some practice time on actual dancing.

    I think the reason you are not getting any traction in this thread is because the whole topic seems unfocused and overwhelming and wishy-washy all at the same time, and many of the elements you have touched on are discussed in various threads elsewhere.

    From what I gather, you had some sort of dance epiphany recently. And for whatever reason, are trying to project that onto other posters and draw it out of them. My impression of the vast majority of the posters on this forum (pls speak up anyone I am misrepresenting) is that most of them have very clear goals, which may or may not have evolved over time. Occasionally there are hiccups or moments of doubt, some of which get expressed and resolved on this forum, but I don't think most of us are in this weird state of wonderment that you currently find yourself in.

    One thing I would caution... a few of your comments smack of elitism. Remarks like "the normal reasons might be enough for some people", and the attitude that snapdancer called out regarding social dancing (psst - if you're not getting good exercise, you may not be doing it right). I'm having difficulty reconciling this with the declared open-mindedness of "I want to hear all your stories". Our stories are already out here, mostly in other threads.
    Requiem, Sunsetdancer and raindance like this.
  6. Sunsetdancer

    Sunsetdancer Member

    I appreciate your input, and advice. It's always good to recheck how wording may come across. ...and my attempt at discussion seems to have been totally misunderstood. It was not meant to be complicated.
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2017
  7. opendoor

    opendoor Well-Known Member

    Ok, this one is on tango (I´m tango dancer in the first place), but I think you can apply it to any sort of dance. So how would you alter, complete or change the chart, what have been your stages?

    IndyLady and Sunsetdancer like this.
  8. Sunsetdancer

    Sunsetdancer Member

    Cool. It really is a progression, isn't it; not just of learning steps, patterns or movements, but even more a psychological progression.

    It takes a humble, teachable attitude to admit that this chart is pretty close to reality. We do start off thinking we can conquer the dance world in one easy session, then we learn it is a life-long process. I had a hunger to learn, but life priorities which prevented me from seeking total emersion into dance training. That was my frustration. In dancing socially, the fun of it, especially in Tango, is the communication....conversation. To me, each dance and partner is special, and it is a giving proposition. What can I bring to this 3 minutes that will enhance this person's experience? So I wanted to learn the whys and hows and things that make the dance work. I am always a student. It is a very exciting journey to me, and as one of my fine art professors used to say, "If you cease to be a student, you will no longer be an artist." (Walter Emmerson/Former Art School Director at SMU Dallas TX)
    opendoor likes this.

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