General Dance Discussion > Is it possible to compete and "hate" your partner?

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by Larinda McRaven, Feb 23, 2009.

  1. Warren J. Dew

    Warren J. Dew Well-Known Member

    Good point.

    I'll stand by my "more frequently" statement, though - as in, "it's the rule in asymmetric amateur and professional partnerships, rather than the exception."
  2. Chris Stratton

    Chris Stratton New Member

    Thinking about it more, the unpleasant pro/am situations seem a little more likely to occur when the pro is not competing with a pro partner - in other words, when they have no other outlet for their dancing than what they can accomplish with students.
  3. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    You seem well-versed on the subject, lol.
  4. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    Excellent. *yes*.
  5. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    One would think, but I've seen some surprising behaviour amongst pro-am pros at comps.

    I think there are some pro-am dynamics which can become rather twisted. Utterly foreign to my own experience, but there are definitely pros with a strange way of being "professional" with their students.
  6. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    Wait...didn't I just write the same words? LoL...had to do a double-take.
  7. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    That's been my observation as's been the case in every pro-am dynamic that has raised my brow.
  8. elisedance

    elisedance New Member

    fraid I've seen sadder cases - in one the pro screams, berates and is positiveily abusive - to an am that they've been with for over 10 yrs. It looks like one of those sad mutually dependent broken marriages where neither party can see they are wasting each other's time. Either that or, I suppose, they like it that way... Incidentally this pro is an independent with relatively limited training.
  9. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    Yes, I've seen this as well.

    The bonds that tie humans together can be very complex.
  10. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    Taking the same flight is a good way to ensure that both partners actually make it to the destination (at the same time)...
  11. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    agree...far worse
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    pleading the 5th big time here
  13. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    just to be clear...the big girl pants comment was about how I treat myself not directed at any one person here
  14. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    some pros in pro /am are very invested in the as to dynamics comment ;)
  15. Bella

    Bella New Member

    Yeah, I knew that. I was just using the phrase in my post...
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

  17. Bella

    Bella New Member

  18. emeralddancer

    emeralddancer Active Member

    Totally agree with this. :)
  19. emeralddancer

    emeralddancer Active Member

    What is funny ... is thankfully I learned a long time ago that I have the CHOICE in how I behave and the words I say, what I do or do not do, etc. IE: like, no one makes me angry, sad, happy, etc ...I choose my feelings, actions and reactions. Sometimes I have the forethought and maturity to think before responding, at others I don't and inevitably learn from it. (human after all) But I blame no one, nor do I point fingers. I take my medicine so to speak ... sometimes bitter, sometimes sweet. LOL

    Plus the fact I have had a few (and thankfully only a few) issues in ballroom ... and thankfully, I have been through and learned quite a bit in the past, as to how I handle the situation or situations that arose. I have inwardly laughed at these, to some I have shared what I felt bothered or hurt me, and thankfully the wise have helped me through it. Sometimes, all you can do is just let go, because sometimes it really is not about you but about the person choosing to say or do those things. Or rather (And I have said this before) Chew up the meat and spit out the bones. It is easy to get stuck and complain or whatever, and hard to just let it go and see the positive. Most honestly ... even with the few issues that I have experienced ... there is not one person I have met since starting ballroom a year and half ago that I can honestly say I dislike. 1. I do not "know" people that well 2. I simply do not care enough about those matters as much as I care about my dancing and how to improve it. and 3. There are some realy great positive people that make it that much brighter.

    One thing I have liked here ... is being able to throw this topic around (or any for that matter). Much is playing devil's advocate on my part ... because in real life, I actually subscribe to things like Larinda has said. :)

    surprise surprise. Hahaa
  20. CANI

    CANI Active Member

    Absolutely agree!

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