But to me all of those are different things. I certainly prefer followers to be as close to me as possible and even to resist in movement so that we're joined at the chest. Sometimes that leads me into an embrace that is apilado, sometimes it does not, and as I said, there's a continuum around the point in which both partners are so far forward that they'd fall without the other partner, as far as I am concerned. But perhaps you lament things that I too would lament - I certainly would find it sad for teachers not to teach how to commit yourself to your partner in the embrace. It's hard to guess since I can't experience the teachers you experience.