General Dance Discussion > My Eyes Are Up Here

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by VRRDA, Aug 3, 2006.

  1. VRRDA

    VRRDA New Member

    OK we have talked about turning girls into women and boys into men and men into gentlemen. Explain this one for me – cleavage!

    I not talking about formal comp costumes, carefully assembled outfits of three band aids and a piece of silk. I am talking about in social dancing situations. All women have them but some have them on display and some have them reeeeely on display.

    Of course I notice. I am the product of millions of years of evolution that has refined the male response to certain stimuli.

    What do want me do? Say nothing and never get caught peeking? Comment on what a lovely outfit you are wearing? Roll my eyes and suck my thumb? Help me here, please.[FONT=&quot][/FONT]
     
  2. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    Um, don't worry about it? If the cleavage is on display, it's intentional and you have no reason to make apologies for looking at it. If women don't want their decolletage looked at, they won't wear something revealing.
     
  3. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    *LOL*

    This is interesting. DH and I have had many conversations about this topic, b/c he’s got some very strong feelings on the subject.

    Of course you notice. There’s nothing wrong with that. And, I’d dare say (although I may very well get lynched by other women—ladies ;-)—on the board for saying so) that women expect and want you men to notice to some degree. I know that I do, when I’m in a particularly outgoing mood.

    It all comes down to how you notice. With all due respect to Joe, noticing is not the same as staring--and just because she's wearing something which shows more skin is not to say that she wants you to talk to her chest. The trick, according to DH is to notice discreetly. Take a quick glance when you can without being noticed, make a nice mental image for yourself, and then make sure you talk to her face and look in her eyes and treat her like a person. But don’t stare, for the love of god. And try not to get caught. Be a man, not a male—if you really want to stare at some cleavage, go get yourself a magazine or visit a club. As DH likes to mutter when he sees guys breaking their necks to watch a woman walk by, “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

    There’s nothing wrong with commenting on the lovely outfit a woman is wearing, so long as you don’t follow it up with, “It really shows off your cleavage—niiiice.” That, my friend, will not earn you brownie points. Personally, even if I dress in something low-cut, or particularly flattering, I don’t want to feel like I’ve got to wave my hand in front of your face and tell you to speak to my face. Unless I know you and we’ve got something of a relationship established, I don’t want to see a blatant once-over. I may very well know that it’s happening, but at least wait until my attention is elsewhere.

    If you get caught noticing, and it happens, at least have the decency to snap your eyes up to her face immediately, and to look abashed.

    Of course, if there’s a different kind of relationship between you and the woman in question, then I can’t help you there.
     
  4. Shooshoo

    Shooshoo New Member

    Like Peaches says 'notice discreetly', but I agree some women overdo it, that even I have to take care not to stare.

    :p
     
  5. Twilight_Elena

    Twilight_Elena Well-Known Member

    I wore a cleavage-on-display dress for a showcase. My best friend (male) snorted, bit his lip and said "Do you WANT me to cooment?" :lol:
    If you wear low cut tops/dresses, you're choosing it. No one is making you wear them. So unless the stares you get are hungry/sleazy/slimy/haven't seen breasts before/I'm 14 and crave sex kinda stares, I think it's okay to appreciate something that looks nice.
    Also, a low cut top does not a scandalising oufit make. Takes a bit more (or actually less) than that. ;)

    T_E
     
  6. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    Well yeah. If you put your face in it and take a nap there, that's probably a bit over the line. :D
     
  7. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    See, though, that's exactly what I meant when I mentioned a separate relationship b/t the OP and a particular woman. With some guys (friends) I'm OK with the once-over, or the comments (from one friend, I actually got a "Nice boobs!" comment, lol, I was wearing a very low-cut corset). But it depends on the relationship we've already established.

    Again, IMO...noticing is OK. Appreciating is OK. Expressing said appreciating--tactfully--is OK. Staring is another story altogether, and not OK. And, if you want to be polite about things, you'll try not to get noticed noticing.

    Very very true.
     
  8. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    OMG! I just about choked trying not to laugh out loud at that one (I'm at work). You gotta' warn a girl before you break out a line like that! LOL!!!
     
  9. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    Sorry, I couldn't resist -- we haven't had a good cleavage thread in a while! :cool:
     
  10. AzureDreamer

    AzureDreamer New Member

    Also good if you just -can't- hear the beat in a song:

    "sorry, I totally lost the beat there for a moment. was getting distracted."

    ;-)
     
  11. skwiggy

    skwiggy Well-Known Member

    "Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun, you don't stare at it. It's too risky! You get a sense of it and then you look away."

    - Seinfeld

    ;)
     
  12. Twilight_Elena

    Twilight_Elena Well-Known Member

    :lol: True!

    T_E
     
  13. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    "Be careful with that, son! It'll poke your eye out!" :D
     
  14. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    exactly
     
  15. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    more exactly
     
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    you missed the thread of a life time...do an advanced search with the word cleavage and you will see what i mean;)
     
  17. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    there are lots of things we haven't had in a while.:cool: ..but yea cornutt, I almost spewed my coffee on that one....there is an older gentleman at the studio who only comes up to about there on me and well, I am not flat (let's just leave it at that) and i really can't look at him dancing b/c he will notice that i am noticing where his gaze tends to rest...er take a nap...and he could just about rest his head there:rolleyes:
     
  18. Twilight_Elena

    Twilight_Elena Well-Known Member

    Hmm. I haven't had anyone staring at my cleavage. Or other assets. Maybe I just haven't noticed, I can be CLUELESS sometimes.

    T_E
     
  19. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    just as well TE...thats a good thing
     
  20. Twilight_Elena

    Twilight_Elena Well-Known Member

    Not having a clue or not having anyone stare?

    T_E
     

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