General Dance Discussion > one guys beginning dance struggles

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by wiseman, Jun 16, 2010.

  1. wooh

    wooh Well-Known Member

    Well if you're trying to choose them, aren't you being picky as well?
  2. So, you're saying he got what he deserves? hmm... Actually in one of the post, he said the instructor paired him with the ladies his own age.

    I am curious though haven't you come across any of the older ladies who are picky too? Ladies who prefer to dance with guys who can lead like their teachers. Because I sure have in my beginner's hell days. To me two does not seem to be a statistically signifcant number to draw any inferrences. Also, have you taken note of what these two girls did after they have taken themselves out of dancing with you? Did they go and dance with guys who are better than you?

    I do second Mengu's advice.
  3. wiseman

    wiseman New Member

    What? I wasn't picky. I danced with ANY woman who was willing to dance with me. I danced with the girl my age before her feet hurt, I danced with this middle-aged woman (looks like she's in her 50s) and I even danced with this woman that looked like she was in her late 60s. I danced with whomever was willing to dance with me. It's just that none of those older women had feet problems, but the young ones did.

    And why would I be picky, especially after I just said I'd RATHER go to a class that rotated partners. Don't you think I'd want to stick to where I am since that's one of the rare studios that allows you to be picky?? When you rotate partners, there's no picking.
  4. Chris Stratton

    Chris Stratton New Member

    I don't think he can be blamed for prefering to dance with someone his age any more than those classmates can be blamed for preferring to wait to dance with someone more experienced.

    Both desires make a lot of sense in moderation, but how wise or practical they are depends a lot on the situation. Some group classes are really about dancing together and that sense of purpose sets the character of interaction, others are more of a waiting room and marketing venue for pro/am (one on one training or competition with a teacher), and that can have huge effects on the depth of student interaction.
  5. Indiana Jay .... LOL
  6. Laurie

    Laurie New Member

    wiseman, welcome fellow newbie! It sounds like you may have gotten your original questions pretty much answered. I'm finding that Dance Forums is a great place to get feedback on stuff like this, and I'm glad that people told me about this site. :)
  7. wiseman

    wiseman New Member

    Yes, my question has been answered. And not only has it been answered, but I'm now more encouraged than ever to put all this behind me and to continue dancing. I found a couple of new dance studios and will check them one out tomorrow to see how it is.

    I would like to thank you all for welcoming me with open arms, for being helpful, and most of all, for encouraging me not to give up on this wonderful activity.
  8. wonderwoman

    wonderwoman Well-Known Member

    You sound like you might be a lot like me. It is the place and the people and the teacher and the music and every outside factor I can blame..

    The biggest barrier between me and my enjoyment of my dancing is me.
  9. TangoRocks

    TangoRocks Member

    Yeah, welcome to DF wiseman, I couldn't answer from work even though I read the thread with interest (internet over cellphone-as-modem doesn't work as well as in those commercials, lol)

    Many moons ago, when I first started dancing, there were those ladies (newbies like me, but talented followers) who chose to dance with the experienced, older leads, because they (correctly) realized that those guys could make even a newbie lady who can follow, look very good indeed. Why do a magic step or a box with me, when they can be doing grapevines and swivels with the "good" leads, right? Well, sure... However, what they missed was the fact that I, and a few other guys in those selfsame classes, the ones who had to count the steps and even *shudder* look at the floor while trying to do the patterns, were of the persevering type--I am by no means the best or flashiest lead around, but I have no lack of partners and guess whom I am not asking to dance? Not to mean I don't dance with them if THEY ask, but...

    I'm positive the dancing will do wonders for your confidence (it did, for me)--don't let a few spoiled princesses ruin it for you! :cheers:
  10. Laurie

    Laurie New Member

    TangoRocks good points. And there are definitely lots of us out there who would dance with a nice, thoughtful person like yourself, wiseman. :)
  11. Laurie

    Laurie New Member

    wonderwoman that is so true!
  12. Laurie

    Laurie New Member

    wiseman I think you are on the right path now. :cheers:
  13. TangoRocks

    TangoRocks Member

    Seconded and thirded, I suppose :) A judge even wrote that on my critique sheet once, something like "Try to look like you are enjoying the dancing" :rolleyes:
  14. I fourth that.
  15. Kits

    Kits New Member

    Well my Answer to the topic, I do dance with anyone. Especially at dance studio parties. Dont Mind how old or young, beginner or advance. I like to get on the dance floor whenever I get the chance and Im sure others would like to too. So I will gladly have this dance with you ;)
  16. latingal

    latingal Well-Known Member

    lol...wiseman are you feeling quite overwhelmed by the community yet? don't - we're really a friendly group...just a bit overwhelming at first.
  17. barrefly

    barrefly New Member

    wiseman, Being the father of a talented 16 yr. old dancing daughter who is going
    through her primadonna stage,....I just want you to know.
    "Youth is wasted on the young."
  18. wiseman

    wiseman New Member

    Thank you! You're all very kind!

    I found a new dance studio and will schedule some private lessons and see how this new place is. If I like it, I'll start trying out the group classes. Hopefully, it will be a better experience.
  19. wonderwoman

    wonderwoman Well-Known Member

    Def look around til you find the place where you fit :)

    I used to look forward to going to my studio and referred to it as my "happy place" hehe
    It was where all my friends were.
  20. wiseman

    wiseman New Member

    I went to this new dance studio. Good news is they're not money hungry. They've got tons of people going there, so they don't need to worry about pushing people to stay like my old studio did. But it's a whole new different style of teaching, so I gotta take everything I learned at the old studio and throw it out because I'll just get confused. It's a whole new world. But guess what? Unlike my old studio, they rotate partners every like 10 seconds. So, no need for women to act up and say their feet hurt. You don't like dancing with me....then no problem, you'll rotate in 10 seconds to someone different. But all the women were very nice. There's tons of very young and older women and they all didn't seem to have a problem dancing with me. We're all learning for the first time, so they're all ok with us men not being very skilled.

    I do feel a little bad though because I was getting frustrated during the first 20 minutes of class. The whole new style at this new studio really confused the heck outta me, so I was getting a bit annoyed. The teacher saw me upset and was telling us to be patient. But I was getting the hang of it after 20 minutes and was ok after that. I do feel bad about it, so hopefully, next time, I can be more patient and enjoy the class.

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