Dancers Anonymous > Question for the men: Signs of liking someone...

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by SPratt74, Oct 1, 2006.

  1. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Yeah, but did you tell him this the second day you knew him? I did. DH is pretty circumspect, and exceptionally tactful, when it comes to conversation. He was driving me nuts. So finally I just told him, "Blunt and tactless."

    Of course, his way with words and his willingness and ability to play mental and verbal chess is what makes him so good at his job (sales)...and why I could never do it.
     
  2. Indiana_Jay

    Indiana_Jay Active Member

    I suspect that many men are scared to death of rejection and thus seem more complicated than we are. Societal norms, OTOH, seem to expect men to be tough and confident, which conflicts with the above-mentioned fear, which we therefore feel we must hide. My two cents.

    Hope you're well, SP. I've been away for several months (as I wrote in the "lost comrades" thread). Drop me a line and let me know how your first performance went last spring.

    -IJ
     
  3. RIdancer82

    RIdancer82 New Member

    me too. and I suspect that most people would also agree...yet far too many people don't do this.....
     
  4. salsachinita

    salsachinita New Member

    I totally get what you mean by asking & remembering, Pygmalion ;) ....

    Here's my little bit to add:

    Some of you might remember when (two years ago now, time flies) my SO first started going out with me. He is one of those quiet guys who would regularly blend into the wallpaper :lol: ...... at the time I was surrounded by lots of loud & showy characters (normal occurance in the salsa scene), it was almost a miracle that I knew he existed :oops: .....

    But he stood out against all odds, because he paid attention to details:

    He ended up cooking dinner for me, on our first official date. A lactos free meal...... he remembered that I'm lactos intolerant (which I might have mentioned in passing, to a big group of people). I had NO idea he knew :eek: !!!

    That was how he had won me over. I'm the luckiest girl...!!
     
  5. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Hi sc!! :D Wow. It's been two years already? That's so cool. :)
     
  6. tsb

    tsb Well-Known Member

    i imagine that some guys alter their approach depending on the female. and since you're at least 1/2 of the equation, and from the little i can infer about you, i suspect that any advice will be of dubious merit.

    i will ask the following questions, though:

    1) what do you mean by "like:
    a) someone attracted to you based on miminal interaction and primarily visual and therefore interested in getting to know you and/or work up the nerve to ask you out?
    b) someone you may see on a regular basis such a co-worker, or do business with, etc.?
    c) someone whom you've been to activites with but whose intentions you have apparently categorized as platonic?

    2) do you tend to notice if the people around act the same way towards you as they do to others? that kind of awareness can give you a hint if someone you think is just being thoughtful is that way towards everyone, etc. or giving you some sort of special treatment.
     
  7. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    Oh I miss you! I will email you. I had some stuff come up recently, and it's personal. So, I'll pm you instead!
     
  8. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    I like this post lol! And what you say makes sense and gives me something to think about! Thanks! ;)
     
  9. DancePoet

    DancePoet Well-Known Member

    Ayuh, truth is always better then withholding, withdrawal, and projection.
     
  10. DancePoet

    DancePoet Well-Known Member

    Detail oriented guys and gals are cool. :D
     
  11. DancePoet

    DancePoet Well-Known Member

    Way to go SC! :cheers:
     
  12. DancePoet

    DancePoet Well-Known Member

    Glad to see you are detail oriented. :cool:

    Probably a good reason why there is a lady sitting near you in that newest picture. ;)
     
  13. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    Haha. You see that is why I always told my x that it's the little things that count in a relationship and you just proved my point! Oh I am lactose intolerant too by the way. It's kind of discouraging, but hey life goes on and you find ways to well get around it lol. ;)
     
  14. peachexploration

    peachexploration New Member

    Hi Ms. Peach, my name is Mr. Orange. I really like you. Would you like to have coffee and apple pie sometime?

    The straight forward approach works for me. :cool:
     
  15. Novice

    Novice New Member

    My thirteen-year-old alter ego usually makes the rest of me too nervous for this approach. At best, it's usually a coy/timid "Would it be awfully terrible if...?", and then his response, no matter how direct, is subject to 10,000 silent questions at least until the next time I see him.:rolleyes: Later in the relationship I'll relax and enjoy blunt and tactless, but it takes a bit of time.

    Meanwhile, since DP requested it, an update:
    Stayed out with Man after dancing until almost sunrise last night, and yes, had a not-very-intimate kiss.:) Probably a good thing school work is piling up just in time to be a huge distraction.
     
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    mkay, but there is a differnece btwn blunt and tactless...no?
     
  17. timbp

    timbp New Member

    So if the girl I was with on Friday night mentioned she is lactose intolerant, what do I have to remember when I offer to cook for her?

    I can manage the obvious things (no creamy sauces, sorbet not ice cream), but what are the little things I would never consider because it's not a problem for me?



    PS. Am I the only person in the world who has no food allergies, and likes spicy food? It seems every girl I've cooked for in the past 5 or so years either can't stand hot (spicy) food, or can't have nuts, or is lactose intolerant, or is vegetarian.
    The girl who was vegetarian and allergic to nuts didn't make it to dinner at my place.


    PPS. When I say hot (spicy), it's not really hot. I can (and have) eaten extremely hot food, but I prefer to balance the bite of the chilli with the other flavours, getting a more rounded, less extreme, final flavour.
     
  18. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    Me, me! Love spicy food. And no allergies here either. Only thing I'm not crazy about is lima beans. If you can keep that off the menu, I'm your girl ;)
     
  19. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    But you're already someone else's girl. ;)
     
  20. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    Oh yeah ;) :raisebro:
     

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