I thought this was an interesting comment from another thread (one that I've heard a LOT from women) regarding getting dances when follows outnumber leads - or just in general: And it again reminded me of this hesistancy on the part of most women to be seen as desperate or unwanted if they ask a man to dance So for both laidies and gentlemen: What's the reason for this stigma? It probably varies from woman to woman...depending on lots of variables And for the leads/guys: does it degrade your esteem of the woman if she asks you? i.e. do you think less of her, in any way, for asking? And for the ladies that ask: how do you do it? Direct approach (walk up and ask) or indirect approach (flirt/hint/strike up conversation ) ? And why do you prefer your approach of choice? -I know sometimes guys take that as a compliment, when a woman asks, but in (my) reality, it may or not be, she could merely be making "the rounds" of all available leads in search of variety, just the same as leads men do. And sometimes it is a compliment -Also some women measure their attractiveness by much they get asked, which is probably an accurate read. So what say ye?