I think you communicate very clearly in your posts, even if I have different opinions on some things. As you both lead and follow, you're probably more qualified than I am, to comment on the leader/follower relationship. However, I think the gender imbalance is what creates a bigger problem for followers than the leader/follower setup. Leaders also monitor their connection skill, as well as question themselves on things such as, was the lead clear enough, did I goof up her axis, is my floorcraft good enough, etc. IMO, both the leader and the follower are dependent on each other. Of course, my opinions & observations are based on where I dance, and things could be quite different other places. I think a big part of what defines the relationship is the assertiveness of the two people involved. Also the gender imbalance factors in, as well. I've danced a few tandas where it seemed like the follower was the manager. I'll admit that it was a long time before I ever asked her to dance again, although maybe that's what she wanted. Loosely related to this, I'm curious in your community, who do you think does a better job of nurturing new people. Do the men do a better job of nurturing and dancing with new followers, or do the followers do a better job of nurturing and dancing with new leaders?