Dancers Anonymous > The Whining thread

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by chandra, Oct 19, 2005.

  1. alemana

    alemana New Member

    my whinge is:

    my freaking SHOULDER HURTS. i am SICk of having things that hurt. knee. foot. back back back all the time back. and now i pulled out my left shoulder. did i do it the gym yesterday, as i cruised through a punishing two-hour workout, including lots of exercises involving the shoulder? or did i do it AT HOME cooking DINNER like a wimp? why do i keep doing this to myself?

    OW.

    /whinge
     
  2. macha

    macha New Member

    Aww *blush*.
     
  3. Swingolder

    Swingolder New Member

    I hate it when it is a beautiful day on the first of November. I am stuck at work and my sister drops by (retired) to tell me she just finished a round of golf and what a lovely afternoon it was!!!! I don't golf, but I still didn't like the gloat.
     
  4. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    EXCELLENT WHINE
     
  5. Swingolder

    Swingolder New Member

    Thank you, I do my best.
     
  6. Purr

    Purr Well-Known Member

    Ok, I'm whining today. My teacher, 3 students, and 1 couple are all in Puerto Rico for the Carribean Dancesport Classic, along with 1 other teacher and 1 other student. I'm not with them, and it's a hideous feeling being left behind. The main reason I didn't go was financial.

    I've planned other dance related things this week to keep me busy, so I don't stay home and mope about not being there. I had a lesson yesterday with a teacher at another studio; we worked on the two-step, cha cha and hustle. I'm going to a Latin styling class tonight at another studio, and I'm going to their party on Friday.

    Hopefully I'll be there for the next competition.
     
  7. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    :(

    Hugs.
     
  8. lynn

    lynn New Member

    Whine of the day

    One of my co-workers just decided to promote herself to be my boss - ouch, i've never dreamed of the day i have a conflict with a co-worker.... how DOES one deal with such difficulties :confused: ??

    Oh, my, i just noticed that i was in such horrible mood i ate 1/2 loaf of bread :shock: :shock: !!! No wonder stress leads to weight gain.... i guess my only consolation is that i had whole wheat bread....
     
  9. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Is she really your boss? If not, ignore her. She's your peer. The fact that she bosses you around does not by any means oblige you to obey. (Actually, IMO, you don't necessarily have to obey your real boss, either. :lol:)

    Edit: If she gets obnoxious about, you can say something like, " Sorry Mary. I have an assignment from [insert real boss's name] that's top priority for me right now." Then let your voice drop. No negotiation or explanation. :)
     
  10. lynn

    lynn New Member

    nope, she's my co-worker (from another department, actually) - that's why she didn't go through my boss b/c she knew my boss would've just ignored her - the same thing happened before and it ended up being a power struggle. I guess i've always tried to maintain a friendly relationship with everyone and this is the first time i ever had to deal with something like this...
     
  11. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member

    I'm depressed by the petty beurocrats that call themselves Planning Officers, who wouldn't recognise a good design if it fell on them and tey don't seem to be able to read drawings.

    On one scheme it has become Kafka-esque each time we change something, they don't like it, ask for new information on another matter.
     
  12. Purr

    Purr Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I'm feeling better about it.
     
  13. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    :lol: Kafka-esque? Wow. :( You definitely have reason to whine. :cool:
     
  14. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    With some people friendly relationship = being their doormat.

    Handle her however you want, lynn. :cool: I'm a lot older and more experienced dealing with workplace jerks, so I can't tell you what you should do. What's comfortable for me might be impossible for you.

    But, if you used it or something like it, the script I suggested would put the ball in her court. She would have to explain why what she wants you to do is more important than what your manager wants.

    But, whatever you do, don't explain or make excuses to this girl. If you do, you leave her an opening to continue bossing and demanding. Not good. :?

    Let me know how this goes.
     
  15. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    :notworth: :notworth:
     
  16. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member


    A practical suggestion. read Marshall Rosenberg's book on Non-Violent Communication. It gives a very structured approach to dealing with conflict situations (by separating out needs/feelings/observations/requests) by using these techniques to improve communication you can change what seems to be a power struggle; for example: rephrase his/her request(or is it a demand and if they don't have the authority to ask you to do anything then say no I am ot willing to do what you are asking, I have my own work to do) back to them as a question?
     
  17. chandra

    chandra New Member

    Nope, not gothic at all. Not at all. Infact I only have one or two black items in my closet.

    However I WAS wearing a black diagonally cut skirt, and a cute red tee with the work apron over it.

    Im glad I entertained you
    :)

    edit: I'll add I had no face makeup on at all...
     
  18. lynn

    lynn New Member

    oh, i finally figured out why my co-worker was acting so aggressively. She is up for review for the manager position in her department (since it used to be a 2-people department and the manager quit several months ago so basically there's no competition). She's given these few months to demonstrate her capability to fulfill the role as a "manager" and she has been trying to show that she's manager-material ever since. Apparently, i was the last "victim" of her recent rampage, there has been several complaints from other departments so far that i wasn't aware of. It's quite obvious that she'll get promoted to be the manager next year - but i sure hope she understands that ordering people around and being overly aggressive isn't the only traits of a good manager.....
     
  19. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Ordering people around and being aggressive are often traits of a very bad manager, indeed. :?

    If she gets promoted, find a new job and leave.

    Or better yet, before she gets promoted, show your own leadership ability and upstage her management skills. Maybe you'll get promoted instead. I'd rather have a leader than a manager any day of the week. :wink: :)
     
  20. lynn

    lynn New Member

    too bad she's in another department, so no chance for me :lol: - our company is quite small, so every department has only 1-2 staff. We have a sales department, and the only staff is the sales manager - isn't that weird?? She works in a department where she's the only person left so she'll be promoted for sure! It's funny that none of the employees (at staff level, that is) feel that she's adequate for the manager position and yet our management team is set on promoting her - i don't know, i guess spending smoking break together REALLY does improve your status in the company?? I'm just quite sad to see people think that aggressiveness is the only way up to the top, that feels so wrong....
     

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