Tango Argentino > What do Women Want?

Discussion in 'Tango Argentino' started by larrynla, May 26, 2009.

  1. etp777

    etp777 Active Member

    not AT world, ballroom, but was out after our stduio party with 6 or 7 female students after party to grab drinks. I know they all listed a knowledge of a good lead, musicality, and confidence when discussing their favorite leaders at the party. I doubt their requests would be much different in AT world (though as far as I know these particular women only dance ballroom/swing/salsa). I'm sure none of them would turn down chocolate either. :)
  2. tangomaniac

    tangomaniac Active Member

    What does "resistance" mean?

    This is an EXCELLENT dance defintion. However, it's not explained when the term is used. Most people hear "resistance" and think of the dictionary defintion "The opposition offered by one thing, force, etc., to another." (Webster's Universal College Dictionary).

    Think about it. Why would a woman want to resist a lead? Why does a man have to overcome a woman's resistance to the lead? Yet, the word resistance is constantly used.

    Dance instructors don't explain the difference between resistance and toned. When I shake hands, I give a firm grip, not a stiff grip. My muscles are toned, not flexed. Very few talk about axis and frame so dancers don't understand body alignment.

    I could go on, but it's time for dinner and get ready for dancing tonight, which is ballroom. I'll have to wait until Friday for tango.

    Washington, DC
  3. Angel HI

    Angel HI Well-Known Member

    Have only been reading the 2 topics in this thread, and not contributing b/c I have some distinct feelings about the music/rhythms/timings that would take us into a whole other discussion (some of you might recall from other threads). But, wanted to say on the other topic, nice post......
  4. Steve Pastor

    Steve Pastor Moderator Staff Member

    What's remarkable about this book is that the author has definintions for MANY of the words we use. And they all fit together. I just wonder if they are more useful than the definitions we all seems to carry around with us. I think they are.

    CONNECTION In couples dancing... the feeling of resistance between partners that makes an action and a reaction possible.

    Yesterday, the dreaded "on my own axis" topic came up. This followed several dances accompanied by pushing on my left hand, and pulling on my right shoulder (and was at a practica).

    "I was sort of waiting you you to connect with me."
    "I WAS connected to you."
    It would have been nice if some of your weight was towards me."
    "If my weight was towards you, I would no longer be on my own axis."
    "Yes, you would."
    "NO, I WOULDN'T"

    Also included in the listed definition of RESISTANCE (and left out because of the amount of typing involved!)
    (2) Any time one object touches another object there is a degree of "Resistance" created. It is this degree of resistance that becomes important in the dance.
    (3) ACTIVE resistance comes in a variety of degrees.
  5. hbboogie1

    hbboogie1 New Member

    I was taught a simple exercise. Place a plastic CD cover between your left and her right hands with your fingers pointing up so the CD cover is held in place by resistance, no fingers. Now dance keeping your arms in proper dance position. You will find that it takes very little pressure on the CD cover to maintain a connection and gets you an excellent response to your lead. This is all the resistance that is called for in tango and men don't fight with this it's not one sided the resistance is equally shared by both.
  6. spot

    spot New Member

    Woman want the same things men want

    but in prettier colours.
  7. Heather2007

    Heather2007 New Member

    My highlights: These two statements are contradicting each other.

    Note: some leads are naturally tone deaf and so cannot and will never hear the beat in the song. They shouldn't be ignored but instead encouraged to keep the steps basic.
  8. dchester

    dchester Moderator Staff Member

    Don't most men want women (or is that just me)?

  9. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    LOL! Gotta' love ya! ;)
  10. etp777

    etp777 Active Member

    Won't hear any arguments from me, dchester
  11. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member

    hear, hear; you are not alone.
  12. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    Now, is that amount of resistance supposed to be only in the hand?
  13. hbboogie1

    hbboogie1 New Member

    The starting point is in the hand but you feel it all through the arm and into the upper body. When you do this exercise and lets say you lead a back ocho the resistance remains equal to both partners without any force being applied by either one because the goal here is to keep the CD cover between the two of you and remain in the dance position. If you turn to the left she has to follow to keep the cover from falling. If you move her to the right you need to follow her in order to keep the cover from falling,,,so simple but so helpful
    Try it it really works
    PS you can try it with a non dancer, works with anyone
  14. Ampster

    Ampster Active Member

    On a side note... In AT, close embrace, the resistance is in the chest (center). You lead/follow with it, and don't need to have any resistance, nor tone in your arms or hands.

    The excercise here is to have a sheet of letter paper in between you and your partner's chest. Enough resistance is applied to keep it from falling.
  15. hbboogie1

    hbboogie1 New Member

    Ampsters right,
    this exercise is used to prefect the open embrace.
  16. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Yeah, but that's kind of only useful as a starting point.

    Open embrace, or whatever anyone wants to call it, obviously makes that a moot point. And apilado will, naturally, involve a lot more pressure.

    Also, IME, the pressure varies throughout the course of the lead. It builds as the intention is led, and then reverts to some "base level of resistance" as the weight change happens. Not a lot, but enough.

    Also, the connection through the hand varies as well. It can be nonexistent in close embrace with simple steps, to the point of not needing that point of connection at all. But with other things--like fast pivots or boleos, particularly done in open--the resistance can be much greater, since you end up working from that connection point. (Christ, you have no idea how much $$$ it took for that silly concept to sink in. :rolleyes:)
  17. Steve Pastor

    Steve Pastor Moderator Staff Member


    (except for the having to spend a bunch of money part!)
  18. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member

    more important is what is written on the letter....;)
  19. Steve Pastor

    Steve Pastor Moderator Staff Member

    Let me add with the experience I had on Sunday, when I basically "left the woman alone", and she didn't try to "connect" with me, she did all her steps just fine.
    But, it didn't feel like she was dancing with me.
    And we come back to the "non embrace embrace", but in open.
  20. jantango

    jantango Active Member

    Relax your body, breath, listen to the music, and do what comes naturally in the moment with your partner. Someone wanted to take your money and made it so complicated.

    So much analyzing in tango prevents people from dancing what they feel in the music. They are worried about doing it wrong for the teacher. Do what feels right for yourself.

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