tacad, Your lack of confidence is a little frustrating--however, I'm glad that you are making changes and willing to go for those who you normally would not have gone after before (asking for numbers as well as asking to dance)! It's only frustrating me because I can tell that you CAN BE a confident guy, and you seem to be moving in that direction! Your willingness to be open and talk about these things (such as your feelings after being rejected when asking a girl to dance) is an indicator of a double-edged sword: you are a good communicator and open about things, but at the same time this leaves you quite vulnerable to having those same feelings hurt. Do you think this accurately describes you, or am I way off the mark here? I'm usually pretty accurate about these things, partly because I have had self-confidence issues in the past, and still fight them now. Speaking only w.r.t. dating, not dancing--one key to not getting down when being rejected is to not offer her the opportunity to reject you in the first place. How do you do this? By not judging how interested you are in her, but rather how interested SHE is in YOU. Look for indicators of interest in her (touching you--obviously away from the dance here, lots of eye contact). If you don't get these signs, don't even pursue it--leave immediately. If you do get these signs while chatting for a few minutes, ask for her number, and then leave. Don't hang around. Don't buy her lots of drinks. If she doesn't give you the number, fine--she probably has at least one or two guys every day ask for her number and she doesn't realize that you are a GREAT guy, so don't hold it against her--she's just reacting to you the way she would react to the other jerks who approach her (put another way, she's not rejecting you--she's rejecting who she perceives you to be). If she DOES give you her number, call her after a while, but not soon at all (soon = several days).