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  1. dchester

    How long will you sit until you consider dancing with a stranger?

    For me, if I've never seen a woman there before, my assumption is that she's a beginner, (unless I see her dancing at the milonga). I doubt anyone has an issue dancing with a talented stranger, (but if no one dances with her, you won't find out). I've danced with some strangers (who were...
  2. dchester

    How long will you sit until you consider dancing with a stranger?

    You are entitled to your beliefs and opinions. Others (like me) are entitled to disagree. I'll typically dance with a beginner at a milonga, and one to several at a practica. I will admit to it rarely being with one of my favorites songs, (I usually wait until the first song starts, before...
  3. dchester

    What can we do about women who won't use cabeceo?

    Trust me, some of us are not that sophisticated.
  4. dchester

    Not satisfied with my ocho cortado

    Having not seen you do it, it's difficult for anyone here to say, but my guess is it's the timing of your lead. BTW, the ocho cortado actually starts at the forward with her right, IMO. The rock step before her front is probably the easiest way to get her there, but not the only way. The...
  5. dchester

    What we get told and what we get teached

    FWIW, most people find another teacher, if they're not getting what they wanted, (unless the teacher has a monopoly in the area).
  6. dchester

    How long will you sit until you consider dancing with a stranger?

    That philosophy comes straight from BsAs. It's sort of like a caste system.
  7. dchester

    What can we do about women who won't use cabeceo?

    That's at one place, Obelisco Tango, where they are listed right on the wall, so everyone knows, (well as long as they can read Spanish). Not every place follows the same codes / codigos.
  8. dchester

    What can we do about women who won't use cabeceo?

    You might not like this, but the reality is that many guys don't take/understand hints. If you give a guy a reason that might have a solution, he'll often do that. In your case, the solution (from his perspective) was to wait for the conservation to end. You have to be more direct, and simply...
  9. dchester

    What can we do about women who won't use cabeceo?

    They don't have to lie. Men can say "no" as easily as women do, whether it's done verbally or by the cabeceo. I've said no before, although I'll usually say "yes". Also, if I say no, I try to explain why, and I usually will approach the woman later. FWIW, the argument over whether to use...
  10. dchester

    How long will you sit until you consider dancing with a stranger?

    For me, typically somewhere between 30 seconds to a minute, although like Gssh said, some tandas I do view differently.
  11. dchester

    Degree of closeness and figure frequency

    Agreed, 100% These days, I think more in terms of possibilities and preferences, and less about right and wrong. Sometimes the follower's preferences don't match up well with the leader's preferences, and thus they're not compatible dance partners. They could be both very skilled (or not)...
  12. dchester

    Aesthetics, Technique and Connection

    I don't think everyone wants the same thing. Sure, people want happiness, but what makes different people happy, can be radically different. Also, I do see some people at milongas who seem to want to avoid connection, (although the term "connection" has different meanings to different people).
  13. dchester

    8CB - history

    OK . . .
  14. dchester

    Degree of closeness and figure frequency

    It was an "old school" rule that the belt and shoes were supposed to match.
  15. dchester

    Degree of closeness and figure frequency

    While we both might agree that it should be, the reality is that it's not for some people. Some people will dance lively, regardless of the music. Also, some people feel the music very different from others. That's part of why I wait until the tanda starts, to see if I can then find someone...
  16. dchester

    Degree of closeness and figure frequency

    Not with everyone. I typically wait until the first song of the tanda starts, before deciding who to try to dance with. Others will try to find someone during the cortina.
  17. dchester

    8CB - history

    Yes (between). The counts stay with the follower's steps. However, as part of teaching it, we do variations on the timings (using quick beats at different places). That's why it isn't taught on day one.
  18. dchester

    8CB - history

    Some call that the 8 count cross system basic, although the back step was included when I was taught it. I teach it as well, but not on the first class, but more typically on the third class, as part of the insturction on the cross.
  19. dchester

    Degree of closeness and figure frequency

    My experience is more that I don't want to do fancy figures when in a great embrace, (not so much that I can't).
  20. dchester

    What to do about gender imbalance

    There are some "quirks" after the new upgrade we are running on.