Being "unsexy"

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
#61
well see, that is the thing...maybe someone is sexy in a movie...but that isn't them...for me, I have to get to know someone to know whether or not they are truly sexually attractive...or at least see them as themselves on a regular basis...not just find them pretty...but I will think about the ones I find lovely to look at and hope I would find sexy
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
#62
as regards dancers, I would most like to look like Karina and I am on record as thinking Victor DaSilva is a very attractive guy....
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
#63
honestly, what I really like about the article, which I do think is sexy, is authenticity....as I read it, it is about being free of ego and living without the shame of being a human being in all the the weird and real ways that we are all vulnerable, rather than feeling compulsed to construct an image that somehow measures up to social expectations real or imagined...and I do think it has relevance in terms of how once can dance more freely if one has let go of all of those silly expectations
 
#64
well see, that is the thing...maybe someone is sexy in a movie...but that isn't them...for me, I have to get to know someone to know whether or not they are truly sexually attractive...or at least see them as themselves on a regular basis...not just find them pretty...
Thats for sure someone can be great on screen and then you see an interview and they are obnoxious...bursts that bubble :)
 
#66
I'll cop to being That Guy. Sure, I have a healthy respect for her figure, but overall, she's not really my thing. On the other hand, Anne Hathaway positively short-circuits my brain, and I know that's not a universally held opinion.
Anne Hathaway? Really I find her to be completely unsexy.
And if you saw Sofia Vergara in the mall you cannot tell me you wouldn't look twice :) I would even look twice and I am as straight as can be.
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
#68
okay, just to be fair and digress, like everyone else...

women: Uma Thurmond, Jessica Alba, JLo, Kate Hudson
men: Hugh Grant, Patrick Dempsey, George Clooney, Harry Hamlin (way back when), Walter Payton (the late great)
 

mindputtee

Well-Known Member
#70
okay, just to be fair and digress, like everyone else...

women: Uma Thurmond, Jessica Alba, JLo, Kate Hudson
men: Hugh Grant, Patrick Dempsey, George Clooney, Harry Hamlin (way back when), Walter Payton (the late great)
I've been watching Grey's Anatomy and while Patrick Dempsey never did it for me before, now I find him much more swoon worthy. And Eric Dane, though with the long hair not his current buzzed noggin. Richard Madden, Benjamin Bratt, Johnny Depp.
 

Purr

Well-Known Member
#73
Here's a two non celebrity: Gabe Gutierrez and Keir Simmons. For anyone who doesn't know who they are, they're NBC correspondents. Seeing them makes watching the national news a more pleasant experience. :):D:p
 

IndyLady

Well-Known Member
#74
Regarding the "unconcerned with others' opinions" definition of sexy:

I take naps. Unapologetically. When my toddler goes down for his naps on the weekends, I will often nap at the same time for 1-2 hrs. (If I had a dime for every "Oh, I wish I had time to do that"... you do, you just have to budget your time and prioritize).
 

bia

Well-Known Member
#75
Regarding the "unconcerned with others' opinions" definition of sexy:

I take naps. Unapologetically. When my toddler goes down for his naps on the weekends, I will often nap at the same time for 1-2 hrs. (If I had a dime for every "Oh, I wish I had time to do that"... you do, you just have to budget your time and prioritize).
I find it hilarious that anyone would look at the mother of a toddler and envy her "free time".
 

IndyLady

Well-Known Member
#76
I find it hilarious that anyone would look at the mother of a toddler and envy her "free time".
LOL, good point, it's generally a poo-pooing "must be nice" reaction... it seems there is something contrarian and rebellious about freely admitting that you are willing to take care of yourself and not sacrifice and run yourself ragged 24/7 for your children and all the other obligations (possibly a regional phenomenon).

One other thing that struck me from the list in the original article was "Do you want to eat healthier, but know your friends and family will think you are boring?". IME, eating healthy is rewarded and lauded... you (and by "you", I mean "I") get way more flack for admitting you stopped at McDonald's or like donuts. Which is ironic because I live in one of the unhealthiest states in the country.
 
#77
IL, as a fellow Midwesterner (albeit an expat), I'd say it goes beyond children. The dark side of a culture that celebrates selfless giving (Midwestern hospitality was a thing for my childhood, not sure if it's the same in your area) is that it can make people feel that selfishness isn't allowed, ever. I'd say that extends beyond just children to work, social and community obligations, etc.

And I think there's a missing variable in the food thing, wish I could draw a 2x2 to show what I mean but text will have to do. "Overweight" and like junk food - shamed; "Overweight" and eat healthy - applauded for taking healthy steps; Thin and like junk food - applauded for being "real" (and maybe envied); thin and eat healthy - you're now "that guy/gal". Or something like that, in my experience.
 

IndyLady

Well-Known Member
#78
IL, as a fellow Midwesterner (albeit an expat), I'd say it goes beyond children. The dark side of a culture that celebrates selfless giving (Midwestern hospitality was a thing for my childhood, not sure if it's the same in your area) is that it can make people feel that selfishness isn't allowed, ever. I'd say that extends beyond just children to work, social and community obligations, etc.
I agree with this. I think there's a cultural worship and pressure/expectation of being constantly busy and stressed out and pressed for time and pushing yourself to the limits and beyond. I received the same reactions during my final semester of college, when I only took 12 credit hours and would occasionally take naps (back when being a parent was not even on my radar). Hey, I don't have a monopoly here - you too can live a more reasonably scheduled life, it's not like your life depends on your triple major and 20-credit hour schedule.

And I think there's a missing variable in the food thing, wish I could draw a 2x2 to show what I mean but text will have to do. "Overweight" and like junk food - shamed; "Overweight" and eat healthy - applauded for taking healthy steps; Thin and like junk food - applauded for being "real" (and maybe envied); thin and eat healthy - you're now "that guy/gal". Or something like that, in my experience.
Yup, got this (what, no z-axis? ha ha ha). I would say that thin/eat healthy still seems to be admired in my corner... I can think of several of those types and they are definitely met with approval (or at least not disdain).
 

leee

Well-Known Member
#79
I'll cop to being That Guy. Sure, I have a healthy respect for her figure, but overall, she's not really my thing. On the other hand, Anne Hathaway positively short-circuits my brain, and I know that's not a universally held opinion.
I was going to say that DF's tastes in celebs was dismal until this post. :p
 

Purr

Well-Known Member
#80
Anything with Robert Downey Jr. is good (Sherlock Holmes, Iron Man, Avengers, among others). :D

I swooned over Tom Hiddleston as Loki and Sebastian Stan as Winter Soldier in the Avengers movie.
 

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