The Innocent Crush, another perspective

Sounds like some people can have a crush, accept it for what it is, and enjoy the nice feelings it creates. I can. But it's when you really want the crush to become a relationship that it hurts. I've had those, too.
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
Sounds like some people can have a crush, accept it for what it is, and enjoy the nice feelings it creates. I can. But it's when you really want the crush to become a relationship that it hurts. I've had those, too.
or even if your head doesn't want the relationship but the rest of you is having trouble obeying your head...don't get me wrong...I am thrilled for people who can enjoy it...if that is also the end game...thrilled
 

etp777

Active Member
Definitely been both ways. Unrequited and it hurts, and just a fun time. Also, have had crushes lead me to get to know someone better and then end up with a relationship built on friendship, as someone else mentioned (sorry, it's on another page and too lazy to look). THat was the best. :) Ended up not lasting, but still my best friend.
 
My own theory is that beginning to dance usually correlates with an "opening" in one's life of some kind...something in the person is ready to be found and felt and expressed. So they start their lessons, and moving around physically, and it starts activating that 2nd chakra in the pelvis, which is all about both physical and emotional movement, and desire, and connection and intimacy. You get someone who's had a sleepy 2nd chakra for any length of time, and stuff is gonna start pouring out! They start to feel the *pleasure* of movement and the proximity of such warmth and connection and *feeling*.

Within the pool of instructors, the new dancer gravitates to the one that feels "right", unaware of all the powerful dynamics that such a simple thing touches upon. And suddenly...*crush*.

Painful or not, there's a lotta good stuff that gets brought to the surface during such times.

Wow, brilliant insight and relevation!
 
Nice thread which I have read in entirety.

OP - how about an update please :)


I have mixed feelings about the topic. I applaud the OP for his description of his feelings. You sir are a poet!!!

As for the feeling though, this is an issue that frustrates me in dance. It is I guess the beauty of dance above other past times but it in a sense makes a dance teacher a prostitute. Not physically (but sometimes) but emotionally. As in people pay them for the connection. For the interaction.

This I see as an issue as people masquerade behind dance when truly it is something else they require. Dance is just the form. Risky as dance communities can be ripped apart or never built from this shaky foundation.

That said I respect that dance attracts many people for many reasons and sometimes its just nice to have them :)

So what is everyone's thoughts on this subject?
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
Nice thread which I have read in entirety.

OP - how about an update please :)


I have mixed feelings about the topic. I applaud the OP for his description of his feelings. You sir are a poet!!!

As for the feeling though, this is an issue that frustrates me in dance. It is I guess the beauty of dance above other past times but it in a sense makes a dance teacher a prostitute. Not physically (but sometimes) but emotionally. As in people pay them for the connection. For the interaction.

This I see as an issue as people masquerade behind dance when truly it is something else they require. Dance is just the form. Risky as dance communities can be ripped apart or never built from this shaky foundation.

That said I respect that dance attracts many people for many reasons and sometimes its just nice to have them :)

So what is everyone's thoughts on this subject?
teacher or student; I think there are some who are players and some who are victims and some who are just innocent people who slowly found themselves in a difficult scenario for a variety of reasons
 

Me

New Member
I think worse would be not knowing whether it was mutual or not
See, this is where I get into trouble. I always have to find out whether it is mutual or not. Otherwise I'll just always wander around, kicking myself for not asking.

But, I am fortunate in that I have not found myself in a situation where the gentleman in question was "off limits" in some way (my boss, married, etc). So I've just always gone for it. :D
 

fascination

Site Moderator
Staff member
well...I am off limits, but it is much harder to try to navigate something in the dark than to know what you are dealing with, IMO...and just b/c you seek an answer doesn't mean you get one
 
Without reading the whole thing, my personal opinion on the excess emotional energy is - enjoy it and let it dissipate. Warm fuzzies are great, enjoy them while they last.

P.S. I really admire your Long's Peak achievement. My parents did it twice, but I admit it's beyond my hiking abilities.
 

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