This week's mission (Wed Jan 12, 2005) - eye contact

#41
MapleLeaf Salsero said:
jamaicanspice said:
:D :D :D :D I am planning on using my "secret weapon" :twisted:
Hmm...

And just what would be this secret weapon, JS?
:D :D I'll tell you next week AFTER this week's mission (which happens to be tomorrow night 8) ) has been accomplished :D and YES! I am THAT confident in my secret weapon :D
 
#42
Sabor said:
MapleLeaf Salsero said:
jamaicanspice said:
:D :D :D :D I am planning on using my "secret weapon" :twisted:
Hmm...

And just what would be this secret weapon, JS?
hmm.. is it a weapon of mass combustion!? :shock:
well it IS a weapon of mass something!! :lol: then again it depends on your definition of combustion...............oh my :shock: did I just say that :shock: Sabor you're rubbing off on me!!! :lol: :lol:
 
#43
funny that this came up about eye contact.

i'm *very* bad at it myself. i have made progress in the year and a half i've been dancing - i don't look at the floor anymore - but i still need to force myself every few months to start looking *up* a little higher on the leader's body. i've done it in increments - used to be looking at chest level, then neck, now more like chin.

a leader i've started dancing with more and whom i trust finally mentioned this to me - we're doing complicated patterns in salsa, and occasionally i will miss his outstretched hand because i'm looking sideways or not at him. as much as i've perfected my peripheral vision, it's not enough, and this bad habit has caught up to me.

so i'm taking this challenge.
 
#44
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

newbie said:
Pacion said:
is to try and focus on one aspect whilst dancing and then report back :wink:

All suggestions welcomed for subsequent weeks of course :roll: :D

This week's mission:

a) To look at your partner whilst dancing,
b) To try and get your partner to look at you, by fair means or foul :twisted:
One thing at a time, this is one of my teachers once said to me:
"You're just such a bad dancer, everything you do has to be corrected. Next time you go dancing, try to focus the whole evening on one single thing, for example not looking at the floor. And then another evening, try to be listening to the music. Next time try to actually lead the woman, and so on..."
:shock: what the crust!!! :shock: that aint no teacher!!! that could seriously damage the psychi of a beginner :(
 
#46
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

Pacion said:
a) To look at your partner whilst dancing,
b) To try and get your partner to look at you, by fair means or foul :twisted:
a) I usually do this just fine with partners I enjoy but need to try harder with dancers I find boring . I look in their general direction (especially their arms/hands for the fast/advanced leads) and every now and then their face as I find eye contact a bit unnerving, seems too intimate at times

b) this one's way easy :D not to brag but they just can't help it 8) I style way too much to be unexciting or unenticing haha! LOL guess i was bragging eh
 

DancePoet

Well-Known Member
#48
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

Pacion said:
Pacion said:
is to try and focus on one aspect whilst dancing and then report back :wink:

All suggestions welcomed for subsequent weeks of course :roll: :D

This week's mission:

a) To look at your partner whilst dancing,
b) To try and get your partner to look at you, by fair means or foul :twisted:
:doh: I have read your, ahem, comments :lol: My responses are:
a) the mission is not to stare at your partner throughout the dance. I appreciate that sometimes NOT looking has more of an effect that looking BUT it is to be aware of the times when NOT looking so that it is flirty. :lol:
:shock: Phew, what a relief to know this. :roll: :wink: :lol:

b) yes, it helps if one goes dancing (dancepoet :roll: :wink: )
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

c) when I look at my partner, I still try to use my peripheral vision to see what else is going on in the immediate vicinity to us :? but, this is something that I may have developed from an early stage from ballet classes and perhaps assume that everyone naturally does it? :oops:
Ah yes! Can anyone say, "Floorcraft"? ;) :lol:

d) when I look at my partner, most of the time (!) and he looks at me, we have more of a connection. I can "sense" his leads better than if I wasn't looking at him, irrespective of where I am looking (floor, at the cuter guy behind him, etc etc :wink: )
So that's what those ladies are looking at when I dance foxtrot and they are looking over my shoulder. ;) :lol:
Hmmm ... I wonder if this is happening in Waltz? ;) :lol:

Well ... at least in tango, I can get them to look in my direction, sometimes. ;) :lol:

Then there is Argentine Tango where they are looking at my chest all the time. :shock: Yeah, yeah, I hear all the jokes now. :roll: I have a joke, too. :) And Sabor, since I'm sure you can imagine mine, do me a favor and let's keep this our secret. ;)

e) when my partner looks at me, I believe he feels the increased connection AND notices when I do silly things... which is the reason for dancing, no? :wink:
Yep, increased connection is the key. And when I do silly things, which is not as often as I'd like, if they are looking at me, then they usually smile, giggle, and laugh. :D

f) trying to focus on one thing for a week (or even night), will hopefully make it more second nature :( it does not mean that you stop looking at your partner for subsequent weeks/missions, should you accept :roll: :lol:
:lol:

g) Sabor... you want a challenge/need something that is a challenge for you? :eyebrow: Where is my shirt? :roll: :roll: :wink: :lol:
Maybe the "shirt" is dancing with the "green sockies"? ;) By the way, what color is the shirt? :lol:
 
#50
I find that there is a big difference in looking at, and getting a good connection with.
The looking at can be a stare if it’s overdone.

But there is a point in the looking and leading connection. If I present my hand somewhere, and want the lady to take it, then I look at my hand. If she is wondering where I’m looking at, she will notice the hand easier. That’s important, if the hand is not presented in her direct line of sight.

Beside that I also have to be aware of the positions of the other dancers, use the empty parts of the dancefloor and counter crashing with other dancers that don’t do the same.

Getting some smiles or laughs with your partner is important.

But I take the challenge, and try to focus on “looking at”.
 

newbie

Well-Known Member
#52
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

Twilight_Elena said:
DancePoet said:
MacMoto said:
newbie said:
this is one of my teachers once said to me:
"You're just such a bad dancer, everything you do has to be corrected.
:shock: Really?
This person was a teacher?
Bad form, Mr. Teacher. Very bad form.

Twilight Elena
The formulation may seem rude, but it came after an hour of private where she had tried to correct all the bad habits I had taken along the years (she was not my regular teacher), but not successfully as she was correcting one certain point until it was better, then another point but then the previous point was wrong again. So she had become a bit edgy.
 
#53
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

newbie said:
Twilight_Elena said:
DancePoet said:
MacMoto said:
newbie said:
this is one of my teachers once said to me:
"You're just such a bad dancer, everything you do has to be corrected.
:shock: Really?
This person was a teacher?
Bad form, Mr. Teacher. Very bad form.

Twilight Elena
The formulation may seem rude, but it came after an hour of private where she had tried to correct all the bad habits I had taken along the years (she was not my regular teacher), but not successfully as she was correcting one certain point until it was better, then another point but then the previous point was wrong again. So she had become a bit edgy.
Regardless of your dancing faults it *IS* bad teaching for a teacher to say "you're such a bad dancer". That's not something usefully critical it's just plain critical. I mean, you're a bad dancer compared to who? Compared to her? compared to other students? If you compared your teachers dancing to professionals dancers who dance all their life then perhaps she would look really bad? It's all relative and certainly in your first/second/third year of dancing you'll be going back to basics all the time and having to correct things that you thought were OK before. It's natural progression. It's good to improve, as much as you want and are ready for.

The job of a good teacher is to increase your dance awareness and help *you* to overcome roadblocks to success by giving you the tools to do so yourself. So obviously if you have a lot of things to work on it makes sense that it will take a *lot* of self-correction over a *long* period of time to work on all these things *one by one*. So for her to get edgy with you because you can't fix all these things TODAY? Err.. that's unrealistic! and... BAD TEACHING.

Tell her to relax next time and that you'll work on them one by one during the time between your next lesson, then ask her what else you can work on?

Perhaps she can work on her attitude at the same time.
:lol: :lol:
 
#54
DancePoet said:
g) Sabor... you want a challenge/need something that is a challenge for you? :eyebrow: Where is my shirt? :roll: :roll: :wink: :lol:
Maybe the "shirt" is dancing with the "green sockies"? ;) By the way, what color is the shirt? :lol:
The same colour as my hair? :wink: :lol:


DancePoet said:
Oh, I'm just cracking myself up big time!
:eyebrow: okay, where is the smilie, that is throwing custard pies at the other smilie, hiding :roll: :tongue: :lol: (I am glad you are enjoying yourself, did you know that it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown, so I am saving you from some wrinkles :twisted: :lol: )

Anyone else taking up the mission? :D
 

pygmalion

Well-Known Member
#55
Re: This week's mission, if you choose to accept...

azzey said:
Regardless of your dancing faults it *IS* bad teaching for a teacher to say "you're such a bad dancer". That's not something usefully critical it's just plain critical. I mean, you're a bad dancer compared to who? Compared to her? compared to other students? If you compared your teachers dancing to professionals dancers who dance all their life then perhaps she would look really bad? It's all relative and certainly in your first/second/third year of dancing you'll be going back to basics all the time and having to correct things that you thought were OK before. It's natural progression. It's good to improve, as much as you want and are ready for.

The job of a good teacher is to increase your dance awareness and help *you* to overcome roadblocks to success by giving you the tools to do so yourself. So obviously if you have a lot of things to work on it makes sense that it will take a *lot* of self-correction over a *long* period of time to work on all these things *one by one*. So for her to get edgy with you because you can't fix all these things TODAY? Err.. that's unrealistic! and... BAD TEACHING.

Tell her to relax next time and that you'll work on them one by one during the time between your next lesson, then ask her what else you can work on?

Perhaps she can work on her attitude at the same time.
:lol: :lol:
I agree azzey. Well said. It's a balance. A good teacher, IMO, helps you become aware of your areas for growth without necessarily hitting you over the head with them.
 

DancePoet

Well-Known Member
#56
Pacion said:
DancePoet said:
g) Sabor... you want a challenge/need something that is a challenge for you? :eyebrow: Where is my shirt? :roll: :roll: :wink: :lol:
Maybe the "shirt" is dancing with the "green sockies"? ;) By the way, what color is the shirt? :lol:
The same colour as my hair? :wink: :lol:
And what color is that? :)

Pacion said:
DancePoet said:
Oh, I'm just cracking myself up big time!
:eyebrow: okay, where is the smilie, that is throwing custard pies at the other smilie, hiding :roll: :tongue: :lol: (I am glad you are enjoying yourself, did you know that it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown, so I am saving you from some wrinkles :twisted: :lol:)
Perhaps you could have used this one? :bkick: :wink: :lol:
 

DancePoet

Well-Known Member
#58
pygmalion said:
Has anybody been out dancing this week? Reports, anyone?
Not yet. Maybe tonight. Likely tommorrow.

You think if I take my boat I can get it to look at me? ;)
(see Infamous Hijacked thread to understand silliness)
 

tj

New Member
#60
pygmalion said:
Has anybody been out dancing this week? Reports, anyone?
Umm, I went dancing on Wednesday, but I must admit that I didn't go out of my way about the eye contact thing.

I'm probably somewhere in the "middle of the pack" as far as having enough eye contact/too much eye contact.
 

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