What justifies the high spending cost for learning to dance to you?


Well-Known Member
When I take dance lessons, the goal is to improve my dancing so my dancing with everybody gets better.

My observation is that what often happens when someone prepares for a showcase, the lessons on their limited budget are focused on learning the choreography for that showcase and just enough technique that their professional partner can fill in the gaps. I used to photograph showcases and I could discern the fake dancing in my viewfinder, but would try to time my shots to cover that up.

Showcase syndrome can have negative side effects for others, such as the leader who blames his amateur partner for not being able to decipher his lead of a showcase pattern. Since insert-name-of-pro could do it the amateur lady should therefore also be able to do it -- not realizing that his pro partner is filling in a lot of blanks for him for that whiz-bang showcase pattern she taught him in the first place. Or as I've experienced, dancing a tango with a showcase lady whom I've nicknamed "Paint Mixer" because she throws in shapes I hadn't led and in her own timing -- if I were a can of paint I'd be well mixed by the end of the dance.

But I recognize that dancing in a showcase does fit other people's value equation even if they have to fake it to make it. As long as that doesn't impact my dancing I'm OK with it. Particularly since they're subsidizing the dance-industrial complex for everybody else.

The showcase syndrome I described is not inevitable. I've danced with some ladies who dance showcases and are also good at social dancing.

More details on the showcase proposal I rejected. The implication was that my VW was already good enough. Perhaps there wouldn't have been any preparatory lessons and I would have just winged it. But there still is a $75 floor fee for the performance, and probably a performance fee for the pro. If I wanted to dance with this pro a lot more, I'd take a private lesson with her and skip the extra fees as I don't require an audience. Anyone who likes what they see is welcome to watch my dancing, and if not then they can look somewhere else.

I had a social interaction that exemplifies the kind of thing that justifies to me my expense and efforts learning to dance. Toward the end of a social dance a few months ago with the crowd thinned out, a VW was played. I wanted it to do it but the only person I saw was someone who is an excellent social follow and asked her. She claimed she didn't know how, but I managed to convince her. The dance went quite well. What was the problem?

Then a couple of weeks ago, she asked me to dance a VW, but as we were headed for the floor she asked me to be patient with her during the "bridge." After a couple of questions I determined that the "bridge" is the change step used to transition between the reverse and natural turns. That dance went equally well, including any "bridges".

But I was puzzled as to why she had the concern about the "bridge". I didn't think I had said anything at all to her during the prior dance we had, so I didn't criticize. So I asked her about that, she agreed that I hadn't said anything. Turns out that when she started out dancing two decades ago, she was married to Teacher Guy. She wised up after a couple of years and ended the marriage, but she's still suffering from that. Teacher Guy has a severe case of lordosis, which I doubt is medical. Rather than fixing his own posture, Teacher Guy finds a woman he can browbeat into doing the figure despite his terrible lead. Teacher Guy knows the lady's part perfectly, he just can't execute his own part. That can work to some extent in a slower dance but not faster dances like VW or quickstep. It was amusing/painful watching him attempt a fleckrl with his current victim -- he's so forward weighted that he stumbled over his own feet.

I told the lady that she should make a list of everything she thought she couldn't do because she couldn't do it with Teacher Guy, and recheck it. I told her that she could cross the VW off her list because she could do it with someone at least halfway competent like me. I also told her that she never ever would be able to do it with Teacher Guy but that would be his limitation, not hers.


Well-Known Member
....... but I'm not going to wish hard for that, since last time I was wishing to spend more time there was when my sister got really sick and she is OK at the moment:inlove:
Oh dear, what have I done?! First I teach my niece to dance one Christmas. She has lessons. Then my sister finds her a ballroom partner and they start competing. The his two brothers want to learn, so I get them started with the other 2 girls....and now? They all begged me and DH to dance for them a few months back, and now BOTH SETS OF PARENTS are taking lessons and loving it..... so 5 lots of ballroom lessons each family.... their poor budgets will be shot to bits:rofl: so, so funny. But magical as well.

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