Why are some people so cheap about dance lessons?

danceronice

Well-Known Member
I'd say driving and using a computer are essential these days. Especially in US, with our car-centered culture (unless you happen to live in NYC - which is cultural outlier, IMV). Other stuff, like basketball, and, alas, dancing - not that essential. So I think there's a difference between picking up a skill because you absolutely must have it whether you like it or not, and choosing to learn something because you want to.
This is very true. Even in cities with good public transportation systems like Washington DC and Boston, if you don't have a car life can be very difficult. As for computers, it's a HUGE disadvantage if you don't have at least a rudimentary grasp of them. Those are taught or offered in schools precisely because they're assumed to be necessary life skills now.
 
This is very true. Even in cities with good public transportation systems like Washington DC and Boston, if you don't have a car life can be very difficult. As for computers, it's a HUGE disadvantage if you don't have at least a rudimentary grasp of them. Those are taught or offered in schools precisely because they're assumed to be necessary life skills now.
Which is why those skills aren't a good comparison to something that's not essential to modern survival. One learns them because they have to (whether they enjoy it or not). A better comparison would be between dancing and another individual sport, such as swimming or riding, or learning a foreign language not because it's required by school curriculum, but just out of pure interest. How many people take up those and then quit when time & money investment turns out to be more than they expected?
 
Which is why those skills aren't a good comparison to something that's not essential to modern survival. One learns them because they have to (whether they enjoy it or not). A better comparison would be between dancing and another individual sport, such as swimming or riding, or learning a foreign language not because it's required by school curriculum, but just out of pure interest. How many people take up those and then quit when time & money investment turns out to be more than they expected?
And in all cases, those skills require going to specific venues. You have to find a pool to swim, a stable to ride, and do some travel (or make efforts to meet people from other countries) to speak a foreign language. I mean, come on, most hobbies involve leaving your your house at some point in time and going to some kind of specific place. Actually if anything, I should note that yes, you can dance in your own home. It might just mean bopping around your living room or doing a video, but you can do it. (Although some folks actually build a home dance studio, too).

However, if someone chooses to stay at home all the time and just watch tv, and they're not finding that fulfilling, then shouldn't they try to find activities that suit their interest and budget?

Again, maybe dance isn't the choice for them and that's okay...but make some sort of effort, you know? People always claim to be too "busy" for hobbies but then they can describe in great detail about numerous TV shows that they watch each week. I guess to them, "busy" means sitting on their butts staring at a screen for hours. :(
 

tsb

Well-Known Member
on a somewhat related note, a musician friend mentioned how a potential customer tried to bargain down the rate for a wedding dinner gig. so he told the guy: "find 6 plumbers willing to work 6 hours on a saturday night and get a quote. we'll take half of that!"
 
on a somewhat related note, a musician friend mentioned how a potential customer tried to bargain down the rate for a wedding dinner gig. so he told the guy: "find 6 plumbers willing to work 6 hours on a saturday night and get a quote. we'll take half of that!"
omg I love this...must share with the musicians I know. :D
 
on a somewhat related note, a musician friend mentioned how a potential customer tried to bargain down the rate for a wedding dinner gig. so he told the guy: "find 6 plumbers willing to work 6 hours on a saturday night and get a quote. we'll take half of that!"
I'm just curious, what was the rate?
 
Which is why those skills aren't a good comparison to something that's not essential to modern survival. One learns them because they have to (whether they enjoy it or not). A better comparison would be between dancing and another individual sport, such as swimming or riding, or learning a foreign language not because it's required by school curriculum, but just out of pure interest. How many people take up those and then quit when time & money investment turns out to be more than they expected?
Very true...
 

toothlesstiger

Well-Known Member
Which is why those skills aren't a good comparison to something that's not essential to modern survival. One learns them because they have to (whether they enjoy it or not). A better comparison would be between dancing and another individual sport, such as swimming or riding, or learning a foreign language not because it's required by school curriculum, but just out of pure interest. How many people take up those and then quit when time & money investment turns out to be more than they expected?
But it brings out a very good point. Dancing is not needed for modern survival. It's not needed even for entertainment purposes. 100 years ago, there was no radio, no TV, no internet, no DF. TV, video games, internet are what keep us from sitting around staring into the fire, as opposed to music and dance, which filled that role before the advent of radio. And, yes, you don't have to learn any technique to engage in those modern pass-times.
 
For all that was good about it, I blame the 60's for this one. Let's face it, even with the new options available, partner dance is kind of like traditional marriage. One man, one woman, the man nominally in charge. Very old-fashioned. Not something appealing to the baby boomers in general. They were still partner dancing in the 50's. Ballroom dancing lost a generation, and that generation did not transmit an appreciation for partner dancing to their children.
Correct! The downfall of ballroom dancing correlates very closely with the rise of feminism.
 
Well, the thing is, where do you do it once you learn it? Clubs don't do ballroom. There aren't the high-end supper-club type places with dancing any more, at least not in any number. That circle of society barely exists any more who'd think of 'ballroom' per se to do socially. It doesn't get dramatic enough results to count as fitness if you're only doing it at a beginner level so it can't take the place of those kinds of classes.
One of the big problems is that the places that have live music are typically the ones that have very small dance floors. So, if you want to do ballroom it has to be done in a ballroom to canned music. Boring!

Since I love live music I tend to do more free style than I would like to. There just isn't a choice because very few places have adequate floors, and even if they did it's difficult to randomly pick a partner that knows ballroom.

I have began to realize that the only ballroom you need to know to dance at most venues is two step and some basic swing moves. That's as far as it goes when dancing among the general public.
 
But it brings out a very good point. Dancing is not needed for modern survival. It's not needed even for entertainment purposes. 100 years ago, there was no radio, no TV, no internet, no DF. TV, video games, internet are what keep us from sitting around staring into the fire, as opposed to music and dance, which filled that role before the advent of radio. And, yes, you don't have to learn any technique to engage in those modern pass-times.
Before modern communications dance was used as a mating ritual. Now with online dating it's more important to know computers than dancing.
 

kayak

Active Member
Since I love live music I tend to do more free style than I would like to. There just isn't a choice because very few places have adequate floors, and even if they did it's difficult to randomly pick a partner that knows ballroom.

I have began to realize that the only ballroom you need to know to dance at most venues is two step and some basic swing moves. That's as far as it goes when dancing among the general public.
Social ChaCha is great for those mini-floors as well.
 
on a somewhat related note, a musician friend mentioned how a potential customer tried to bargain down the rate for a wedding dinner gig. so he told the guy: "find 6 plumbers willing to work 6 hours on a saturday night and get a quote. we'll take half of that!"
More thoughts on this. Attempting to negotiate the price down is part of our culture as well, or at the very least it is endorsed by media and is considered quite normal (it's more like "you didn't try to negotiate for a discount? what is wrong with you?" rather than "you wanted a discount on that? you're so cheap"). I have read (or at least skimmed through) countless "negotiate best deal/discount on a yard service/remodeling job/car/wedding services or anything else with an invoice or price tag" articles, sometimes because I was planning to hire someone for a job and was doing research online, and sometimes just because they showed up in my news feed. Everyone of them said "Don't be afraid to ask for a discount - the worst that could happen is that you'll get 'no' in response". So I am not surprised at all that in this climate people would try to negotiate prices down.
 
I am married, but if I was not I believe that I or anyone would probably stand a better chance with ballroom dancing than with computer dating or bars.
You'd think that...but as I stated in another thread, I've not gotten any dates from dancing at all. Many of the guys in my dance scene are already taken, or if they're single, I'm not what they're looking for, or vice versa.

To put this back on topic, IF a person's main goal is to find dates, then they may be cheap about dance lessons if they feel the lessons don't yield what they want.
 
jenny is right. In fact, I was discussing that very same thing with some swing dancers a few months ago. Some guys attend community swing dances in order to meet women, but they very seldom stick around... and when they do, it's NOT because they keep hoping to find a date. Rather, it's because they've come to enjoy swing dancing.

Ultimately, I think that jenny hit the nail on the head in post #23. If it requires any substantial effort to learn, then most people will not do it. That's how a lot of folks work.

I touched on this as well in another thread. I mentioned that a lot of people stick to club-style dancing (or "white people dancing," as some would call it) because it requires no skill. Pick out a hundred people who love to dance, and only a tiny minority will have any interest in learning, whether through actuals lessons or through self-study. That's just reality.
 

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