Have you ever felt depressed?

I was wondering if any of you ever felt depressed? I just started crying last night and cried for hours it seemed. I finally was able to cool it around 3 in the morning when I decided to turn on the television set only to find a character on a sitcom that I was watching was feeling the same way that I was feeling. It was weird, because she said everything that I was thinking. Then I realized that well... maybe I'm not alone (even though I know television is all make believe lol). And then I thought, maybe I was supposed to turn on that television set at that time, so I can learn a valuable lesson. I mean God does work in mysterious ways lol. But if I hadn't of cried that long, and if I hadn't of turned on that television set, then I'd probably still be miserable today.

But anyways, it was a huge relief that my sister called me today, because I was able to tell her what happened, and she told me not to get discouraged. I told her it was like I just didn't know how to get to the next level that I need to be at. I've taken care of other people so long that I've forgotten how to take care of myself, and I realized this after last night. I've also smiled pretty for so many people and just stayed strong in front of them that I realized that I can't do that any more. I have feelings too that I need people to listen to now. I need people (you know my family that type of thing) to listen to me instead of me being there mom, because I'm not their mom. I'm still growing and learning and I need help too, you know?

And the thing is that I haven't had a tough life. Sure I've had my moments like everyone, but it hasn't been anything horrible. In fact, I've done things, and been places, and have met people that people only wished they could do and see and meet. I've been very lucky in my life and very grateful for everything. But the thing that gets me is that there are very successful people in this world that get everything they want. And not all, but quite a few of them have things just handed to them on a silver platter. And then you start to wonder why you haven't had that happen to you in your life. Well, I realized that some ways I have. It's just that it's not the type of things that these people end up with, because we all have different lives and different paths that we need to be on. So, how selfish is that way of thinking anyhow?

Then I felt guilty for thinking those things today, so I stayed inside and ate chocolate and chips all day lol. Ok, I had healthy meals too, but you know. Sometimes you just need to snack lol. And I feel pretty good for being able to talk things out this time. I ended up in severe depression last year, because I wasn't able to stand up for myself. I felt that because I was the strong one, that I couldn't show any signs of emotions that way. The only ones that knew I was feeling that was my mom and a friend of mine that helped me get out of that state.

Well, you probably know more about me now than what you probably care to, but I realized today that depression or anything close to depression is a subject that should be talked about. But you all don't have to go into details like I did though. I'm just curious to know if any of you had ever felt the need to cry for hours that type of thing. Thanks!

I've been fighting depression in various levels of severity since I was in high school, so we're talking for about 25 years now. It can be really tough. For decades I thought that medication was "cheating," but a few years ago I decided that there really wasn't anything mentally or behaviorally wrong with me...nothing like not taking time for myself, or not sticking up for myself, or anything like that. No, it's just that my brain was a little hosed compared to normal happy people and needed some help.

I didn't want to go on Prozac or any of that stuff, though, so I found a doctor who works with a nutritionist on cases like mine. They put me on amino acid therapy and it took some time but it really turned my life around. Of course, sometimes I'll stop taking my aminos for a few months and I'll slowly slide down into the dark pit of a poorly-functioning serotonin and endorphin system, but I've gotten better at seeing the signs that I need to kick up my aminos again. So anyway, for me it's been good because when there really is something wrong, I've got the emotional strength to deal with it because it wasn't all wasted and spent on "false moods" due to poor brain chemistry.

I hope you find the solutions that work for you. For some people it's letting loose a stifled voice within. For others it's working through old issues that have let fester. For still others it's about other things. Good luck and good health to you!

I'm still in the mode of thinking that medications are 'cheating'. I have a couple of good friends who are or have been on medication, but I'm still being stubborn. I've found that regular exercise helps me a LOT. I typically suffer from blue moods, and they're not nearly as bad as they used to be -- I attribute that to doing cardio 4-5 times a week for 1/2 hour or so. (and I bet if I work on my diet, I'll actually start losing weight like I want to).

In fact, when I was sick last week and didn't exercise for over a week, I got depressed for the first time in months. I'm sure others have problems that aren't so easily addressed, but for me, exercise is good.

It's also nice to just be busy... but yeah..> Exercise is my easy way out. (now if I could just lose weight!)

spratt, I hope you won't mind my saying that the back of your head is very attractive.

not anymore...you have to work hard at being depressed, I don't mess with that state anymore. If you don't wanna be depressed...just stop. Depression is nothing but a state that you have to work at, like lower your shoulders, change your breathing and all that. If you were to stand up straight with a big knat grin on your face its impossible for you to get depressed no matter how hard you tried, you would have to switch back to the old state. The only way you can get depressed mentally is by focusing on a problem...now why the hell would you want to do that, I say 20% on the problem 80% on the solution if I throw water on you you won't be depressed anymore because I change what you were thinking about. Its that simple....I can't even remember what depressed feel like...lol. Now I am about to share something with you that costs a lot of money. Since I am in the world of self-help and consulting I will give you a free assignment. Everyday you wake up I want you to aanswer all these question:

1. What am I happy about in my life right now?
What about that makes me happy? How does that make me feel?

2. What am I excited about in my life right now?
What about that makes me excited? How does that make me feel?

3. What am I proud about in my life right now?
What about that makes me proud? How does that make me feel?

4. What am I grateful about in my life right now?
What about that makes me grateful? How does that make me feel?

5. What am I enjoying most in my life right now?
What about that do I enjoy? How does that make me feel?

6. What am I committed to in my life right now?
What about that makes me committed? How does that make me feel?

7. Who do I love? Who loves me?
What about that makes me loving? How does that make me feel?


print this out and answer all the question every morning. Anybody who is interested can obviously do the same, if you do this for 7 days I guarenteed you will see a huge break through in your life...you will be happier than ever. This will also make you a better dancer as well (for real, i'm serious)

There have been times in my life when I could have provided amazing upbeat answers to all of those questions and still felt so badly that I wished my car would wreck going over a bridge. Fortunately I got the kind of help that I needed. I'm not saying that what you suggest won't work, because it will for some people. But for others, if it doesn't work, don't blame yourself or tell yourself that you failed, just try something different.

I'm still in the mode of thinking that medications are 'cheating'.

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To each his/her own, unless you're his/her doctor.

I've battled depression since I was seventeen. So far, things are on an even keel, but who knows when The Other will pop out again. I guess my handle should have been "time bomb". I don't like to think of myself as that way, but I'm too far into this thing to think that I couldn't have a cold snap. That's always the problem- people meet or like me when I'm "normal", and then THAT happens. It's rather embarassing.

It's actually quite stupid- I'm by nature a hermit/recluse type because of this, and what do I do but pick the most social lifestyle of ballroom dancing. Not smart.

I should add that depression is just depression. Contrary to what ANYONE says, expert or no, it's very fickle and tricky, and for each person, the WHOLE THING, from diagnosis to treatment, to life with it, is different. The cause isn't always obvious- and, for that matter, there isn't even always a "real cause"- (but there usually is- it just hides VERY well sometimes).

It isn't just for the insecure, the paranoid, the weak, or whatever people would like to dismiss it as- it isn't trivial, and it isn't stupid. It can be not only mentally devastating, but physically, as well.

There's so much that could be said about it, yet it's already been said somewhere or another. It's very redundant to echo "you aren't alone", but there's strength in numbers- unless you're Cybil.... (ok, bad joke...)

SPratt74 said:

But the thing that gets me is that there are very successful people in this world that get everything they want. And not all, but quite a few of them have things just handed to them on a silver platter.

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You really can't tell if they're happy or not depressed, can you?

I have been one of the lucky ones who don't get depressed often, maybe for half a day or so. I can't judge cause I know there are people who get really depressed and I could never understand. There is clinical depression which is another issue.

But for the daily mood swings, I think one can work on it.

jhpark said:

I've found that regular exercise helps me a LOT.

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I've been exercising regularly all my life, maybe that's one of the reasons?
Whenever I feel bad, I think of worse things which happens to other people so I can appreciate what I have.
I try to connect with people I love and the ones who love me. A hug always helps.
I try to take up new 'fun' activities. Keeping busy and learning something new challenges your mind.

SPratt74 said:

Then I felt guilty for thinking those things today, so I stayed inside and ate chocolate and chips all day lol.

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Don't feel guilty. Chocolate is good for you .

SPratt74 said:

I was wondering if any of you ever felt depressed?
...
I'm just curious to know if any of you had ever felt the need to cry for hours that type of thing. Thanks!

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sure...i think its sometimes necessary to feel this way. i dont know if i would call it depression for myself; to me, its a clinical term that requires professional attention. but feeling blue or sad every now and then, yes indeed. in fact, your post is quite timely, spratt.
...ive been feeling "blue" for the past few days and i find that crying is one very natural way to release it. its not my favorite outlet (lol results in puffy eyes the next day!), but i tend to be emotional. btw, none of what im referring to is related to the topic of women's hormones.

i dont think ive had a difficult life either, but i think that sadness is necessary in life. if it didnt exist, we wouldnt experience joy. at least thats the way i see things. we need one extreme in order to have the other.

i hope you feel better...it will pass. things come in waves...ride it and see where it takes you. =)

jenn said:

but i think that sadness is necessary in life.

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true, but there is a difference between sadness and depression, don't you think?

I see depression more that you don't want to go on. A feeling of heaviness.
I see sadness more a result of disappointment. This I believe is healthy to express cause it's part of your emotions.

icering said:

not anymore...you have to work hard at being depressed, I don't mess with that state anymore. If you don't wanna be depressed...just stop. Depression is nothing but a state that you have to work at, like lower your shoulders, change your breathing and all that. If you were to stand up straight with a big knat grin on your face its impossible for you to get depressed no matter how hard you tried, you would have to switch back to the old state. The only way you can get depressed mentally is by focusing on a problem...now why the hell would you want to do that, I say 20% on the problem 80% on the solution if I throw water on you you won't be depressed anymore because I change what you were thinking about. Its that simple....I can't even remember what depressed feel like...lol. Now I am about to share something with you that costs a lot of money. Since I am in the world of self-help and consulting I will give you a free assignment. Everyday you wake up I want you to aanswer all these question:

1. What am I happy about in my life right now?
What about that makes me happy? How does that make me feel?

2. What am I excited about in my life right now?
What about that makes me excited? How does that make me feel?

3. What am I proud about in my life right now?
What about that makes me proud? How does that make me feel?

4. What am I grateful about in my life right now?
What about that makes me grateful? How does that make me feel?

5. What am I enjoying most in my life right now?
What about that do I enjoy? How does that make me feel?

6. What am I committed to in my life right now?
What about that makes me committed? How does that make me feel?

7. Who do I love? Who loves me?
What about that makes me loving? How does that make me feel?


print this out and answer all the question every morning. Anybody who is interested can obviously do the same, if you do this for 7 days I guarenteed you will see a huge break through in your life...you will be happier than ever. This will also make you a better dancer as well (for real, i'm serious)

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You know that I actually looked at this thread last night and saw your post, and I started to cry. I couldn't answer anything, because I felt guilty for thinking about myself. Those are questions as to which make you think about yourself, and the word that kept going through my mind was selfish for thinking that way.

I didn't want to think of myself as depressed, but I came to realize today that maybe I am. I don't even want to leave my house. I'm lucky that I get up and take a shower at this point. (Of course it helps that I am overly obsessed about being clean lol.) And the thing that scares me is that I feel better thinking that I get to stay in more than if I were to go some place, and I'm not this type of person.

I think though that a lot of it is that I'm just so burnt out with a lot of things. I don't know why but I know one thing is that I hate the computer. I've been in the field for a little over ten years now, and it's to the point that I don't even want to get on the computer to check my e-mail. This leaves me in a bad situation though, because I am attending school for computers. I've only got today and next week left, but I don't even want to go. I can't bring myself to get out of my house to go to school even. My mom said that I don't have to continue that way, because she knows I've already got my degrees and has worked in the field long enough. But now it's like what now? How do I go to the next step and to do so without being selfish?

It's nice to know that I'm not alone in this matter though. I didn't expect any detailed reports from anyone, because I know it's an issue that people can judge quickly without knowing anything about the subject. I too though have been dealing with this issue since I was 14, but it's never gotten this bad. Ok it did last year as to which I was given a twelve step program to where I had to work on myself. I was supposed to do things slowly and when I felt like I could do them. I thought I was doing them pretty well until this hit me. And it's like what someone else said about how it's embarrassing to go through this when people like you for being normal.

Well, I'm not normal and I'm not perfect. I know this. I've known this all my life, but man I've become a great actress though by showing everyone else that I have no problems what so ever. And that's the thing. It's like, if I admit that I am this way to everyone else, would they still like me? Would they still be able to count on me? I don't want them to think that I can't handle things. But then again, maybe I can't right now, and this is God's way of telling me to cool things. I don't know.

SPratt74 said:

Well, I'm not normal and I'm not perfect. I know this. I've known this all my life, but man I've become a great actress though by showing everyone else that I have no problems what so ever. And that's the thing. It's like, if I admit that I am this way to everyone else, would they still like me? Would they still be able to count on me? I don't want them to think that I can't handle things. But then again, maybe I can't right now, and this is God's way of telling me to cool things. I don't know.

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Everyone has problems SPratt74.
Some people will always like, some will not and never will, no matter what.
Just stay with the ones that like you and you like.

How do I go to the next step and to do so without being selfish?

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Stop trying to not be selfish!!!! Think about what is best for yourself; do what is best for yourself. Very frequently, you'll find that other people -are- what are important for you... that you want to do things to please them, because of what they mean to you. Altruism and selflessness is a curse; there is nothing better than hearing, "I want to do this because I want to do it and its important to me" or even "I am doing this for you, because you are important to me."

but its that personalization... that sense that it really means something to you that makes a difference, both to yourself and to the people around you.

My own stratagies for dealing with depression are:

1. To get motivated: start by doing something small and acheivable9 A friend once told me that her grandmother had given her the advice that "action precedes motivation" . I have found this a useful thing to remember

2. Go for long walks. Exercise helps and exercise that hoes the potential for being enjoyable is better still.

3. Watch The Simpsons.

4. I've done a group course on Cognitive Therapy approaches to depression and I've got a few self- help books that, when I remember, I refer to. Main aims are to change thinking habits ("all or nothing" focussing on negative etc.)

5. Dance tango; it doesn't change anything but its an escape for a few hours.

6. Not to deal with it or try and change it: don't try and pretend to anyone that I'm feeling happy or cheerful when I'm feeling crap; just accept that's the way I am at the moment.

let me add that being depressed and having clinical depression are two different things, and so is grief, one symptom of which can be depression....lots of distinctions and I will just echo that the way one manages one is not the way one neccessarily handles the other...if you are depressed over a lengthy period of time with, particularly with no loss issue to pinpoint and with very little variance in intensity, it is time to go to the Dr.