One for the guys...

Ha, ha, ha. I received a call from a girlfriend yesterday reminding me of a good night of tango that I missed on Saturday. (Hey! I have a treasured bunch of non-tango'ing buddies I simply sometimes have to catch up with). Anyway, she then went onto describe in her email a woman who had never danced before, she was an absolute beginner but by the end of the class, and come the milonga, there were a queue of men making a beeline for her. Such was the presence that his "bleach-blond haired, mini-skirted Marilyn Monroe lookalike" was giving off one particularly advanced male dancer grabbed her and as my friend described, "had this poor woman doing bad voleos and ganchoes all over the place and many times the poor dear almost fell to the floor. But still the man did not quit".

[Yep, its times like this I prefer to people-watch rather than dance..ha, ha, ha].

I could only assume the poor girl wanted to just dance and not feel like a hopeless heap being gropped, grabbed and breathed on and have the audience transfixed by what I assume to be something akin to a drunk monkey attempting acrobats.

Why would anyone in their right minds subject this poor woman to such a display for the sake of what...3 x 3 minutes of what for chrissake...and yes, the culprits were those guys in the 40+ age bracket I am told. The girl, I understand, looked barely out of school. So what is going on here guys?

lust :wink:

Honey, it's not rocket science.

It's not even brain surgery.

*snort*

As the saying goes, it takes two to tango. She could have stopped it at any time, had she not been enjoying it.

bordertangoman said:

lust :wink:

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thanks for my daily laugh out loud

tangotime said:

thanks for my daily laugh out loud

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As someone with PhD in Clinical Psycholgy and Philosphy, and having written papers on Freud; Jung; Wittgenstein, Reich, Fromm; Fischemittbicyclism and others; my answer was reached after much deliberation, consideration of the facts presented, analysis, cogitation and meditation....

Heather2007 said:

"had this poor woman doing bad voleos and ganchoes all over the place ".
So what is going on here guys?

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If she's dressed in a way that will attract leaders they will assume that she's ready for them and skilled. If she can't dance then her Marylin Monroe look is a misleading message.

Pas de tout, Pascal... A woman can dress the way she likes to go to a milonga: the man who invites her should adapt his dance to her skills. That's why we dance a whole tanda together, expecially if we don't know each other: the first tango is "to check" the ability of the partner, the second one "to tune", the third one to enjoy the dance.

If she's dressed like Marylin Monroe one must expect a little
boo-boop-ee-doop!

Now if she came as Mae West or Lauren Baccall another matter altogether.

Oh la, la, Pascal...that's like saying, "she deserved it coz she wore it". Opening up a whole can of worms there I think. Trust me, you really don't want to go down that route.

Bordertangoman. Thank you. For if I, as a woman, were to have ended my posting - "methinks lust is afoot" then all heaps of the aforementioned worms would have come flying my way. Safe for a bloke to say it on paper and for us girls just to think it in head. Ha, ha, ha.

Peaches: there was absolutely no mention of her "not enjoying it" just mention of how many of the guys did. :uplaugh:

I think it was despicable for the other dancers to sit back and watch it happen. The girl was new. To judge her by her pretty appearance was catty and wrong.

SOMEBODY should have stepped in. But, I guess the men were too busy standing in line, and women too busy making nasty remarks. Nice.

Heather2007 said:

Peaches: there was absolutely no mention of her "not enjoying it" just mention of how many of the guys did. :uplaugh:

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OK. Fair point, I misspoke.

My point is, without anyone stopping to ask her how she felt about it, no one necessarily knows that she was unhappy with the situation. It can be flattering to a newbie to have that kind of attention, and can be exciting to a newbie to "do" all kinds of fun and advanced things...never mind that they're not being done correctly, or that she doesn't know really what she's doing. My point (not to be confused with "she was asking for it," which is a whole other ball of wax), is that it was within her power to stop what was going on. If she did not stop it, presumably, on some level, she was getting something out of it.

Now, for how she was dressed. It is reasonable to expect that an attractive woman dressed attratively (or provacatively) is going to attract attention. That's just the way the world works. It DOES NOT mean that if men are inappropriate then she was "asking for it." I have never felt that, will never feel that, and you will NEVER hear me saying such a thing. If the men were being inappropriate, that is all on them. But you cannot fault them for the attention paid to her, so long as it's appropriate.

Regarding onlookers...if the men were being inappropriate, or if the girl in question truly looked as if she was unhappy, then, yes, another girl should have said something to her.

okay, I don't know a thing about AT...but let me say this...a mini skirt is a very comfortable thing in which to dance, particularly if it has built in shorts...regardless, it is cool and allows for movement.....as a blonde who wears them often, I regret to inform the male population that is has nothing to do with them....and to think otherwise is to make an assumption that isn't true in my case and may not be true in others