"Who was that you danced with?"

waltzguy

Active Member
Have you ever been faced with a non-dancer friend's question, something like "Who was that you danced with?"? Or, "How many people do you dance with?!". I find it sometimes difficult to explain to people the whole concept of a dance partner. In many/most non-dancers' minds, the only person you should ever dance with, let alone touch hands, is your SO or spouse.

Anyone else have that issue? Or do you just explain it easily what a dance partner means.
 
Very common among "civilians". They tend to think in terms of high school / college / bars where dancing is done to meet a romantic interest. I tell them that I and many others dance just to dance. IF we meet somebody, fine, but that is not the primary goal.

My NP said once that if she were to become romantically involved with another dancer, she'd expect him to dance most dances with her and maybe just a couple with other people. I see her point, I guess, but it also showed me I don't want to get involved with her.
 
i need to explain that almost all the time. everybody thinks that if you have a dance partner that you are also romantically involved with him/her.

:mad: people know how to be very difficult sometimes.
 
Yep, I've run into this many times, as well as the related notion that since my DH doesn't dance, there must be something wrong between him and me that I'm going out dancing and/or that there's something going on between me and guys I dance with.

My parents were really bad about this whole thing. What finally ended it was them watching me dance AT. We had invited an AT friend of mine to celebrate Thanksgiving with us (and then, later, two different AT friends to Easter dinner), and...well, AT friend, me...how could we NOT dance??? So we put music on and danced around the house in our socks while family looked on. Including DH, who made it very clear that he had no problem with it/enjoyed watching/enjoyed seeing me happy. When they saw that he had no issues with it, and they got to see just what was and was not going on in the dancing they became OK with it. And we were dancing close embrace, so if they were going to have an issue with things, they would have had ample reason. ...never mind that I'd been trying to explain things to them for a couple of years, and trying to get them to come to a social so they could see for themselves...no, I'm not bitter in the least... :rolleyes:
 
Most people who learn who I dance with immediately think that my partner's just dancing to get close to me...they don't know how wrong they are.

Apart from that I get, 'So you get to wear cool dresses and lots of makeup? Like on DWTS?'
 
Most people who learn who I dance with immediately think that my partner's just dancing to get close to me...they don't know how wrong they are.

Apart from that I get, 'So you get to wear cool dresses and lots of makeup? Like on DWTS?'

this is also n often question. but when i say a price of the dresses - it is always "I didn't know that is so expensive".

But what I hate the most is that some people are very rude when they say that dancing is not sport and it is not hard. But when I show them some moves, than they shut their mouth.
 
You know, people are always shocked by how much my dance dresses cost--but I've worn my Smooth gown six times and my Rhythm (which is newer) at least three times so far. I have a $185 bridesmaid's dress in my closet that, let's face it, even though it's nice I'll probably never wear it again because it looks like a freakin' bridesmaid's dress! Ultimately, which dress costs more in terms of hours worn vs. price? Let's not even get into what your average wedding gown costs these days (in the unlikely event I get married I am refusing to spend more than $1000 on a gown because really, WHY? BTW, my divorced friend would like to know if anyone wants a wedding gown, slightly used. You think dance dresses are hard to resell....)

Regarding the whole dance-as-prelude-to-romance thing, I've never really gotten that seriously, just the usual "are your teachers straight" and "are they hot?" Possibly because I don't do much social dance and don't have an am partner.

"It's not a sport": Yeah, I've heard that about figure skating and horseback riding, too. (In the former, same as dance, it's too "pretty" to be a sport, in the latter case "Doesn't the horse do all the work?") I've learned to just let it go.
 
Aren't there any bridal resale shops around your area? A friend of mine got a dress for about $300 from a place that sells used and clearance dresses - size changed, bride decided on a different dress, wedding called off, etc.
 
lol, that's what lady at work said. :P SO ignoring her subsequent email asking for help on something. :D
 

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