men with a girlfriend and a dance partner

waltzguy

waltzguy

Active Member
How common is it for men to have a girlfriend, and a separate female as a dance partner? Do you think this is inherently harder for men to maintain this set of relationships? Since men are classically considered the initiators in the relationship life, I wonder if this is somehow creepy.

I think this is a lot more common for women to maintain a boyfriend and a male dance partner, and somehow I believe it is more considered okay.

Note how I use the term girlfriend, instead of wife. There's the pursuit aspect of a continued relationship, which is always theoretically possible with a female dance partner. Thus, my question, and dilemma.
 
waltzguy said:
How common is it for men to have a girlfriend, and a separate female as a dance partner?
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Very common. It's the norm on my team. Actually, I've seen a lot of relationships go sour sooner than they would have because they danced together. I'm not saying partnering a boy/girlfriend will cause a breakup, but it will certainly speed one up. I've also seen relationship break-ups ruin partnerships.

waltzguy said:
Do you think this is inherently harder for men to maintain this set of relationships? Since men are classically considered the initiators in the relationship life, I wonder if this is somehow creepy.
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No. It's only creepy if you, well, are creepy about it. And that goes for guys or girls. If you can't handle a working non-romantic relationship with a member of the opposite sex, that's your own individual problem, not a problem with dance relationships (and I mean "you" in the general sense, not you you).
 
I can't imagine how it would be possible for me personally. I have my hands full with just a dance partner :p


Of course, if that went romantic, then great, but actually having to maintain two relationships like that simply doesn't fit my goals and commitment to dancing, and I doubt I'd be able to dance with a girl who didn't have a similar attitude.
 
I know lots of people that just have a dance partner and life partner and eveyone gets on well. I think for a non dancing parnter it takes the pressure off making them do something they dont want to.
 
Not my choice BTW but would do it if he no longer wants to dance, but can't see that happening!
 
My girlfriend dances; practically every weekend involves extensive social dancing and/or workshops, and we've just started working on our third routine together. That said, we live three hours' away and she has no interest in competition, so I partner with another girl for competition.
 
I dance with my wife, and we compete some. But admittedly we're not really serious competitors, and each of us has our own career.
 
We start this year but wont it to be fun...I know we will try our best but I dont want it to be crushing as we are not playing for cattle stations :-) (now that is an Aussie Expression)

cornutt said:
I dance with my wife, and we compete some. But admittedly we're not really serious competitors, and each of us has our own career.
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suburbaknght said:
My girlfriend dances; practically every weekend involves extensive social dancing and/or workshops, and we've just started working on our third routine together. That said, we live three hours' away and she has no interest in competition, so I partner with another girl for competition.
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I am the girlfriend to which suburbaknght refers. For me, I consider his competitive partnership as no different than any other professional/working association, even though it is a "hobby" activity.
 
Any time you have a man and a woman working together in close proximity on a shared project, sparks are going to fly unless they are physically or otherwise repulsive to each other. It's simply biology and I've seen it happen over and over again.

How one or both react to the sparks is the question. You are responsible for your own actions.
 
This might seem a little crazy, but my desire to be a strong lead in dance is complimented by and equally strong desire to be a good follow in sex.

None of my (female) dance partners have (fortunately) understood that.
 
QPO said:
I know lots of people that just have a dance partner and life partner and eveyone gets on well. I think for a non dancing parnter it takes the pressure off making them do something they dont want to.
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My DH went from being jealous to can't wait for me to find a partner so he can NOT dance with me :)

I guess the thing is being open with your life partner and find a life partner who has a life of his/her own (eg. have a 'freaky' hobby him/herself) LOL !
 

Having a girlfriend I dance with regularly, as well as another girl I dance with regularly (her husband won't dance), I'd say there is no problem.

When I dance with the other girl, the only thing I'm concentrating on is the dance itself, and so is she.
 
Everyone's correct about statements like being responsible for your own actions. I think the bigger problem may be the perception by your SO of you liking your dance partner, regardless of any actual attraction. For a man with a SO and DP, I still think this is harder thing to deal with, than a female with the same situation.
 
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