Studio non-fraternization contracts, protecting whom?

I was wondering what's your take on the subj. First time I've heard about it was 2-3 years ago, I wasn't even dancing, but friend of mine went with his wife to take classes and the studio made both of them to sign the contract. The explanation was "it's being done to protect customers" ??? Protect married couple from what? Doing threesome with their teacher?

Later, wherever I went, they had little bit different policy, students didn't have to sign anything, but the teachers had to sign the same contract, no dating with any student in that studio. I've asked why, the answer was different too - to protect the teachers. I know one more studio, with the same rules, and reasoning, protect the teacher.

So, what is it about, protecting whom? Techers? Students? Both? It's a kind or rule that beggs to be broken I think. Just for the sake of it.
Protecting teachers? If the student is a weirdo or a maniac and goes after that teacher I doubt that'll help, rather a police matter, otherwise how is that differnt from everyday life, no is no, you don't need a contract to tell no to someone from your eveyday life, do you?. Then what? Protect the teachers from themselves so they don't get excited and go dating every single student in the studio? Dunno, doesn't sound convincing. Those teachers are adults after all, not underages.

Manager in #1 studio, the one "protecting" their customers with this contract mentioned that they've had customers buying expensive gifts for their teachers, then get upset, etc... That sounds rather like protecting customers vallet Which leads to the conclusion that at least in that case studio didnn't want customers money spent on something else. I guess they were worried about the sales of various packages they had to sell to those "victims".

Anyway, I'd be interested to hear opinions. Do teachers really feel protected somehow by signing that piece of paper? Or students feel more safe? May be it's all nonsense? Do those stidios have specific reasons?

My opinion, for what it's worth, is this. Who is demanding all these non-fraternization contracts in the first place? Studios. And that's who stands to benefit. Studios are protecting themselves from legal liability if a student/teacher relationship goes sour. Bottom line.

And, I agree. It's a rule that begs to be broken, and, I'm guessing, gets broken regularly. Let's face it. Dancing is physically intimate, and from time to time, the boy/girl thing is going to get in the way.

On second thought, your idea about studios preventing students from spending money on things besides lessons bears more consideration. A couple of years ago, when I left a job I had at the time, the first question my former teacher asked was what my significant other did for a living. What a self-interested sleazy guy he was. The only thing he cared about was whether I could buy lots of lessons from him. And to make it worse, he was a mediocre teacher, at best!

I'm not going to beat a dead horse, so check out the thread on franchise experiences. My experience was quite bad.

I had a student come in to take the introductory special, which was 4 half hour lessons. On the second lesson, while I was holding her hand, she was lightly caressing my wrist with her fingers. I couldn't tell whether she was doing this subconciously or on purpose. Either way, I couldn't stop wondering what was going on.

Our studio had a policy that forbid teachers from dating students. This especially applied to private lesson students. Sometimes they would "look the other way" if the student was only enrolled in group lessons. Dating a student who was taking private lessons was strictly prohibited.

On the last lesson it was time to sell her a program. I expressed concern when she told me the private lesons would be difficult to fit into her budget. I told her that maybe group classes might be a good start and then she could add private lessons later. When she got done writing a check for a month of group classes, I asked her out to dinner.

We have been happily married for 3 years (and known each other for 4½ years).

I have had to sign this "non fraternazation" paper/contract. I believe it is protecting the studio. From what I get out of it the studio doesn't want the students to get all obsessed with the dance instructor or think that they can hang out with them all the time outside of studio events or what have you. (not saying students are crazy/obsessive etc etc). I also think it has something to do with the studios not wanting instructors to "steal" aka take the students with them if they decide to leave that studio. Everyone knows the turnover rate. Also, you can't pay special attention to one student over the rest and give them special privledges which you might be inclined to do if you were dating a particular student.

My two cents 8)

pygmalion said:

The only thing he cared about was whether I could buy lots of lessons from him.

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Well, I guess that's rather "studio spirit" In that regard they're worse than car mechanics. At least in my experience.

DanceMentor said:

Dating a student who was taking private lessons was strictly prohibited.

We have been happily married for 3 years (and known each other for 4½ years).

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Because its a lot more money with private lessons, no?
Cool that it worked out well for U though

MissAlyssa said:

I have had to sign this "non fraternazation" paper/contract. I believe it is protecting the studio.

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Never thought of legal aspect of that, but I guess somewhere it's true. Though mainly I believe it's because of money. Otherwise they'd just say it's for our protection, why to come up with BS like protecting clients or teachers...

Everyone knows the turnover rate.

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You mean teachers?

Also, you can't pay special attention to one student over the rest and give them special privledges which you might be inclined to do if you were dating a particular student.

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Might be true for group lessons, but doesn't apply to private lessons I assume.

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DanceMentor,

I'm so glad you posted your reply. I think the trick is knowing when to follow the rules, and knowing when to ignore them. I'm glad things worked out for you and your former student/wife. God bless you both.

pygmalion

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Everyone knows the turnover rate.

You mean teachers? Yes I mean teachers.

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Also, you can't pay special attention to one student over the rest and give them special privledges which you might be inclined to do if you were dating a particular student.

Might be true for group lessons, but doesn't apply to private lessons I assume. No, I mean in general you should never give special attention to one student over another. You should try to treat everyone the same. We all know it's not easy and doesn't always happen but you should at least try to keep it that way.

MissAlyssa said:

I also think it has something to do with the studios not wanting instructors to "steal" aka take the students with them if they decide to leave that studio. Everyone knows the turnover rate.

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MissAlyssa,

I think you have a point here. The studio I used to be affiliiated with made teachers agree not to contact their former students for two years after leaving the studio's employ.

I also think that these agreement may be related to protecting the studios from sexual harassment claims. Sadly, I had to study sexual harassment law for a course once, and wow, companies can really be hung out to dry if they don't protect both their employees and customers from any appearance of harassment. That's why most companies, not just dance studios, have some sort of written policy.

What made you study harassment law?

MissAlyssa said:

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No, I mean in general you should never give special attention to one student over another. You should try to treat everyone the same.

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Well, you're a teacher, you know better. Except if you're dating doesn't that mean you're not treating that person as "everyone"?

P.S. And I am not sure how this "treat everyone the same" works with private lessons, I thought the point was to get more "individual" instruction vs. group.

I'd like to also point out that as a teacher you are constantly in the spotlight. I remember I went through a phase where I probably dated 4 or 5 girls over about a 4 month period. These were not students, but they were dancers. You should have heard some of the comments that people made about me behind my back.

You'll have to take my word on this, but I was not going around sleeping with all of these ladies, but that is what people were perceiving. Because you are around multiple members of the opposite sex in a way that all but a few would only dream of, people tend to talk. This talk can be very destructive to a teacher's reputation.

A similar situation occurs with receiving gifts from students. Students start to believe you are showing favoritism toward certain students when you accept gifts. Also, it is easy for people to think you are taking advantage of your students even when the student is giving out of the kindness of their heart.

No fraternization policies definitely have their place!

DanceMentor said:

I'd like to also point out that as a teacher you are constantly in the spotlight. I remember I went through a phase where I probably dated 4 or 5 girls over about a 4 month period. These were not students, but they were dancers. You should have heard some of the comments that people made about me behind my back.

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I don't think in that situation it'd make any difference whether you were a dance instructor or a jet pilot. Regardless of your job people will always talk, of course, none of their business how many girls U date per month, but that's the way things are.

A similar situation occurs with receiving gifts from students. Students start to believe you are showing favoritism toward certain students when you accept gifts. Also, it is easy for people to think you are taking advantage of your students even when the student is giving out of the kindness of their heart.

No fraternization policies definitely have their place!

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Funny, but at least those I know about don't really mention gifts.
Anyway, how does it help? After all if you're dating a girl U can give/receive all the gifts you want without publicly declaring those at the studio

Funny, but at least those I know about don't really mention gifts.
Anyway, how does it help? After all if you're dating a girl U can give/receive all the gifts you want without publicly declaring those at the studio

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I was more referring to teachers accepting gifts from students, in general, not from a boyfriend or girlfriend.

I don't think in that situation it'd make any difference whether you were a dance instructor or a jet pilot. Regardless of your job people will always talk, of course, none of their business how many girls U date per month, but that's the way things are.

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Even though it's none of their business, it's prudent to exercise some level of discretion. In addition, I've gotten in some weird spots where students were showing up to dances and all I wanted to do was be with my date. There are some awkward situations that can arise as a result of fraternization, so just be careful.

I know that there are strict rules forbidding student - teacher fraternization, but was not aware of any contracts regarding such. I never was presented with any for the private lessons I took.

Now, I'm not thinking of asking any staff members out for a date, but I wonder how that rule applies to people who just attend the open dances and are not taking any lessons or group classes.