Is it true that no one at Group Practice will dance with Beginning male salseros?

I'm getting ready to sign up for classes, and I am SCARED SILLY, that no one will want to dance with me, and thus I will receive no practice at all, and will be forced to sit all of my classes out in a corner somewhere looking lonely!

In YOUR general experience, is this how most of your classes have been run? Should instructors force EVERYONE to dance with everyone, and then rotate partners, that way everyone has a chance?

I hope they wont make us ask girls to dance! I would just DIE!
I dont want the girls at class to think that I am hitting on them, or trying to step on their toes. i just want to learn salsa, and unfortunately in male-female partner dances you cant learn unless you have a partner of the opposite sex!

This makes me so nervous, I dont know what to do.

Can anybody help?

Depends on where (country) you are. Generally, either you'll be told to bring a partner before signing up, or you'll get matched up at the class. It wont be awkward because everybody in the class will be doing the same thing, and often you'll be asked to rotate partners.


your best bet is to email the teacher. they'll probably watch out for you and make sure that you're not getting left out in the class.

as to group practice etc., you'd better be willing to take small risks.
the whole business of dancing involves asking girls to dance. chin up and deal with it.

quixotedlm said:

you'd better be willing to take small risks.
the whole business of dancing involves asking girls to dance. chin up and deal with it.

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Okay. So what's the best way of easing into it? Should I start frequenting at the same salsa places that my partners from class dance at? That way when the music plays I can ask them to dance or something?

How did you do it?

3wishes said:

And how would you know this would actually happen to "you" if you don't at least try it? And do not go just once...go several times.
I have lots and lots of friends (leaders) who started out in Salsa group classes and simply asked the "follow" for a dance so he could practice what he learned. Most were willing...then again...you will not know...if you do not ask. BTW,,,go to college dances, organization dances, community dances, church dances...don't select just one social event/outlet to attend - go to lots. You may find, exactly what your looking for.

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^^^ Just got this reply from another thread and thought I'd post it here.

OH BOY! Now I'm REALLY SCARED!

So even in GROUP PRACTICE we have to go up to girls and ASK THEM TO DANCE?!

*faints*

I can't handle this on the first day.
I think I will take quixotedlm's advice and just email the teacher before-hand and see how he handles the classes. If he obliges us to go up to girls and ask them to dance, I will go somewhere else where there isnt as much pressure.

I'm sorry, but I'm having a tough time telling if you are serious, or posting tongue-in-cheek. I will assume you are being serious.
Normally, if you take a group class, and the teacher has you rotate, the least intimidating way to proceed is to ask some of the ladies you took the class with for a dance in the group practice.
If that is too much, you might try practicing the steps on your own, in time with the music. After a few classes, maybe you'll build up the confidence to ask someone to dance, or perhaps by then, some nice lady will take pity on you and ask you to dance.

achilles007 said:

Okay. So what's the best way of easing into it? Should I start frequenting at the same salsa places that my partners from class dance at? That way when the music plays I can ask them to dance or something?

How did you do it?

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YES, make chums, dance friends with those in group class. Ask where do they go? Ask about tagging along or meeting them there. Also, try to realize there are plenty of ladies who are just as scared as you are and are afraid of their own two feet as well.
Try a class where you rotate partners, group class, and I'll bet there are some nervous ladies as well - possibly they might also want to figure out where to practice too. wink wink.

achilles007 said:

Okay. So what's the best way of easing into it? Should I start frequenting at the same salsa places that my partners from class dance at? That way when the music plays I can ask them to dance or something?

How did you do it?

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separate class from group practice in your mind.
conquer classroom dynamics first.
for this, ask the instructor for help. then accept that in the classroom, the agenda is _learning_, and anyone who infers differently is a dunce - it's their problem and not yours. when the class is self-organizing into couples initially, you can either make eye contact with the nearest girl and smile, or just wait until everyone else has figured it out, and you'll find yourself to be singled out, and probably a girl would be singled out as well. you might find that there are no girls left for you (or that there are too many girls left for you). either way, the teacher will ask you to wait in the circle of couples, and when partners are asked to rotate, you'll end up with a girl (and someone else will take their turn to wait - substitute a suitable analogy for the situation that has more women than men).

once you're comfortable with your classmates and become friendly with them, you'll find that going to group practices and asking them for dances will be relatively easier.

as to "I'll go somewhere else", here is a really honest tip: If you can't handle the idea of asking a classmate in a class to learn together (and not exclusively at that - just to start together until the rotation gets going), you may need remedial lessons. you can always take 10-20 private lessons with a teacher, and when you enter the group class or group practice for the first time, you'll already know a bunch of dancing and wouldn't feel any anxiety about asking others to dance.

Okay. Thanks guys.

After taking a break from it. It doesnt seem so bad after all.

It's like going up to and asking someone to be your partner in a lab class. I remember I freaked out at first when I was told we had to do this too in college. But over time I got over it.

I guess this is like that too.

It isnt as big of a deal as some would make it out to be.

Thanks, all

Hey Achilles007,

How are your classes going?

As you probably already found out, it's not as scary asking someone to dance than you had initially thought

When I first started dancing salsa, I was scared too. I didn't catch on as quickly as some people, but I wasn't that bad either. Rotating in class ensured that I kept meeting new people who were just like me. After my first class, I practiced everything I had learned in front of a mirror. So the next time i went to class, I was prepared. That helped take the edge off since I had ingrained something in my muscle memory (as opposed to forgetting everything), which makes the following lessons easier to build upon. It also makes your partner feel more at ease when you've demonstrated you've retained some of the material taught to you in class.

Of course, the purpose of dance class is to have fun and meet new people. Remember we're all in it together. Keep at it and you'll get there.

Chris

With regards to getting rejections at group practice, I wouldn't worry about that.

If you make an effort to go out and practice, you'll end up seeing the same people over and over and develop a rapport with them. This to me is more important than actual dance ability. Make friends with them first, before asking them to dance.

I believe I went to my first out of class group practice roughly 2 weeks into my salsa career (so after my 2nd class, ever). I remember seeing a lot of beginners like me from the same class, thus making the approach less daunting since we had already met. Some of these people I still connect with even today, and was the basis for forming some long lasting friendships.

I believe the key is to show that you actually want to improve. If you make an effort, people will notice.

Chris_Yannick said:

I believe the key is to show that you actually want to improve. If you make an effort, people will notice.

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I agree.

achilles007 said:

So even in GROUP PRACTICE we have to go up to girls and ASK THEM TO DANCE?!

*faints*

I can't handle this on the first day.

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Yes and No.

The most useful advice you will ever get on the subject of asking followers to dance is simply this:

Hold your hand out and smile.. and don't say a word! Wait, then IF you get a rejection don't take offence, say "thankyou" be polite and ask someone else in the same way. That's all.

Anything else you might say or do will likely result in less chances to dance. Keep it simple. Also, make friends (or be friendly) with some of the girls in class. They are more likely to dance with you if you do this.

I think that it would vary from place to place...

azzey said:

Yes and No.

The most useful advice you will ever get on the subject of asking followers to dance is simply this:

Hold your hand out and smile.. and don't say a word! Wait, then IF you get a rejection don't take offence, say "thankyou" be polite and ask someone else in the same way. That's all.

Anything else you might say or do will likely result in less chances to dance. Keep it simple. Also, make friends (or be friendly) with some of the girls in class. They are more likely to dance with you if you do this.

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I suggest saying "may I have this dance?" As some of my more savage friends don't know the hand is asking for a dance.