Questions from a Rookie

C

cathy

New Member
Hey guys,

I'm seeking advise on this board, as I'm not very sure of me learning Argentine Tango. Last year I discovered Tango through music first. I love the slow but powerful music, full of sorrow yet also full of bravery to overcome certain situations. When I listen to those songs I get put into a different era. It's as if I could smell the 1920s air if that makes any sense at all. ;)
Commitment should not be a problem. It's more that I'm not very sure of myself.
I never danced before in my life. In the last two years I lost over 36lbs for various reasons but I'm still quite chubby for my size (5ft 4" and around 168lbs). I'm definitely not very athletic. I don't have someone to drag along and I am scarred to be left standing alone. I'm not sure wether I should go to a weekend training course first to see what it is like to dance, but often those courses are for older couples where I'm in my early twenties. Should I visit a milonga first? Just to watch the dancers.
What clothes do you wear to class? Trousers or a plain dress?
I guess partly I'm overthinking too much but reading through the forum I often came across the declaration of some men that overweight women are hard to dance with and I just don't want to be one of those hard cases in my first class.

Cathy
 
Start with a regular class. Write or call the instructor and ask all the questions you have in mind, no matter how silly they may seem. Where are you located? Perhaps I can suggest the place where you can learn.
By all means go to the milonga, just to observe. Don't worry about dancing for now. Although you may get asked to dance, and say yes, it may not be the best experience. It may be great, but if it is not, keep in mind that it is not yours or tango's fault.
If you are in love with the music, if you wish to dance, go out there, enjoy the music, and learn to dance. When you can do that, it matters very little how much you weight. One thing though, since you don't want to be judged on your appearances, try not to judge and dismiss people on the ground of their age. ;)
 
If you are in a college town, a lot of them have an AT club, it might be worth seeing if you can go to their lessons or if they have a practica.
I can see that a girl in her early 20s who is intimidated by going to a whole new social scene alone, might be a bit nervous about getting on with older people. If you haven't encountered a lot of people that age socially who aren't people in authority, family members or people with whom you are always on your best behaviour (friends of parents/friends' parents etc) it might be daunting trying to figure out how to 'be'. So perhaps a college club-in my experience the AT dancers are usually grad students about her age-may be an easy way to make friends and 'fit in' sooner than later.
That said people are all the same no matter how old or young.

PS don't worry about your body size, forget the stuff you read on here, I think they make half of that stuff up depending on the argument they are trying to win. There are beautiful tango dancers of ALL sizes.
Wear something that makes you comfortable, a pair of nice trousers or jeans or a knee length skirt or dress are good. I would go casual at first until I saw what the local scene is like.
 
cathy said:
I guess partly I'm overthinking too much but reading through the forum I often came across the declaration of some men that overweight women are hard to dance with and I just don't want to be one of those hard cases in my first class.
Click to expand...
Hi Cathy, just so you know where I'm coming from, I'm a leader, 6'1", who weights anywhere from 275 to 280 depending on when you weight me. So by anyone's definition, I'm fat. I've been anywhere from chubby to fat for most of my life. It never kept me from doing anything that I wanted to do. I played sports, I was in the Army (which meant I passed all the Physical training stuff that is required), and now that I'm much older, I dance tango.

Yes, it's true that some fat overweight women and hard to dance with, just like it's true than some thin women are hard to dance with. For you to get good at it, you'll need to develop good balance, along with some flexibility. Of course, you'll need good rhythm, musicality, and especially for tango, you'll need to be good at hugging (the embrace), along with being sensitive to the sometimes subtle leads that the man makes with dancing tango.

If you can do that, you'll be fine. It's hard (at least it was for me), in the beginning, but if a fat old guy like me can do it, I'd say that you can do it too.
 
A college club might be a good idea social wise, but if you wish to learn, keep in mind that the level of instruction and dancing in university tango clubs in the US (with few exceptions) is very low. They invite visiting teachers here and there, but the resident instructors often only have at best 1-2 years of AT experience (mostly in the same club). So, if you decide to take that avenue, consider using it as a springboard into a larger community.
 
  • Like
Reactions: jfm
jfm said:
PS don't worry about your body size, forget the stuff you read on here, I think they make half of that stuff up depending on the argument they are trying to win. There are beautiful tango dancers of ALL sizes.
Click to expand...
Yep, as my first teacher used to say, "Tango is for everyone." and "In the night, we are all equal." In Spanish, but she translated for me. :p

But if you're shy about partnering with people, try a group class. There is usually enforced pairings, and if the teacher is on the ball, you will rotate and dance with a lot of people. Also, see if there is a local Practica (tango practice) as those are usually much more relaxed than a milonga.

I think the best thing you can do as a beginner is as Lilly said, ask a lot of questions, and get to know the scene. Tango communities tend to be close; once you find someone who will tell you who's who in the community, you can start talking to organizers and teachers to find out more information on what's available in your area.

Also, welcome Cathy! Hope you will stick around and post more. :)
 
Hi Cathy 2 of my favorite patners are bigger than you, one is about your height but I would guess about 10 - 15 lbs. heavier. The other is a little shorter, and about 30 lbs. heavier. They are both sensitive, responsive & a pure pleasure to dance with. "Heavy" in tango is due to poor technique, not body mass. I have danced with slender ballerina sized women who were "heavy" due to poor technique. I've suffered through knee, back & shoulder injuries by dancing with small slender women with poor technique so don't let your size dissuade you.

I recommend that you start by going to milongas. DO NOT DANCE. Since you came to tango through love of the music this will allow you determine your next steps. Argentines distinguish between tangueros (fem. tangueras) and milongueros (fem. milongueras). Tangueros are those that are enthralled by the poetry, the music, the culture, the history of tango. They may not regularly attend milongas to dance. Milongueros are those that regularly attend milongas.

In my area, like in Argentina, there are people who go to bars where small tango orchestras & singers perform music like the tango classic

"La Ultima Curda"

If this is the style of tango you like, you will probably not hear it in the milonga. It is referred to as Tango for listening. You can seek out venues in your area that play tango for listening, or just develop your own private music collection.

If you do enjoy the type of music played in the milonga and you want to dance, then take lessons and understand that there is a long learning curve, so have patience. Like others have said, find the local college Argentine Tango club so you can meet people in your age range.

La Turca is an example of a milonguera admired in Argentina & thoughout the world for her dancing with grace & elegance

Here she dances with Jorge Dispari in the Salon style of Villa Urquiza

 
Cathy, let me add my welcome.

Sometimes you have to do things that make you feel uncomfortable, or that you are apprehensive about, if you want to grow. And it sounds like you are ready to take that step. Yes, it is scarey to go somewhere where you don't know anyone, and begin learning something that you don't know much if anything about. It sounds like you are ready to take that step, and that's great.

I still like classes because you get to meet people who are also new to AT. You will see these people when you start going to practicas or milongas, and you will have an "in" with them.

I'm not saying YOU have to do this, but I took lessons for 6 months before I went to my first practica. This can be a long term investment for you.

Your comments on the music and a bygone era remind me that with my listening to Western swing from the 30s and 40s, I'm doing the same thing, but from a different place and time.

Hopefully you've read enough about the weight thing to know most of us think it's not an issue.

Hope you keep us updated, too.
 
Hi Cathy!
Just a warning - be prepared- tango IS ADDICTIVE!!!
And as a consequence... it will take all your FREE TIME and MONEY (tango shoes mostly and all these travels to Argentina that almost nobody can escape!) :)
I almost envy you - it can be frustrating but it's the best time when you just start to dance!
 
You can always pick up any dance as a hobby... it's when you want to become any sort of professional that limits such as age, height, athletic ability apply

I recommend bringing a friend with you whatever class you end up trying out then you wouldn't be all alone in a room full of strangers :)
 
"In the last two years I lost over 36lbs for various reasons but I'm still quite chubby for my size (5ft 4" and around 168lbs)"

pepemaria.jpg


For those who remember the (ever-smiling) little guy, enough said, I think.
 
I didn't think anyone would reply so fast! Thank you so much for your nice comments and suggestions.
Tangobro, actually, I like both styles quite a lot. I'm still trying to understand the different styles of tango music, just recently discovered this neo-tango stuff. But altogether I listen to Osvaldo Fresedo, Carlos Di Sarli, Daniel Melingo and Osvaldo Pugliese mostly.
I stumbled across a place near my hometown where there is a very open milonga for beginners and pros alike. I probably try it there first next weekend. Just to watch of course, I'm too chicken. But bear with me I'll sign up for a class for sure! :)

Cathy
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Dance Ads

Advertise on Dance Forums Reach dancers, teachers, studios, event organizers, and dance-friendly brands. View ad options
Back
Top