That’s why people enjoy social dancing and dance it for a long time into an old age. It is an enjoyable activity for everyone.
"Social dancing messes up [my] technique"?
- Thread starter africana
- Start date
I think this is largely true in competitive dancing too. The exception is when the lead sees a risk of a collision and really needs to get you to move or just change direction. Even then, they shouldn't shove too hard. Even apart from the discomfort of the shove, it's not especially effective because anything toooooo forceful can cause the follow to stumble or just not do what's intended. If a follow won't follow, there isn't all that much the lead can do. (I'm a follow.... been there, done that.)
Yep. This means it can't be treated as pure practice or a learning session. I expect truly super dancers to down level for or just adapt to me. I down level for or just adapt to people who dance something less well than me. It's only 1 dance. (Well, I don't go to AT events. And honestly, the fact of the 3 dance rule is a feature that makes me want to not do AT, though that's not the only feature!)
dlynrmrz
New Member
Wow, thank you for sharing this—it was such a joy to read! I love how you described each lead like a unique conversation partner, each with their own dialect. It’s a beautiful reminder that dance is so much more than just steps—it’s about connection, adaptability, and shared expression.Forgive me for resurrecting an older thread, but it got me thinking about my social dancing experience last night.
It's not a secret that I have a love for social salsa and for the variety of people it brings together. Dancing socially feels like a gift to me and enforces the skill of being able to have a pleathora of conversations with people who speak the language of dance, but also understanding that some dances have many different dialects (let alone levels of fluency).
I had the pleasure of attending a social last night with a heavy salsa theme. Salsa on1, on2, Mambo were all being danced. I had the good fortune of having some deep dance conversations with 4 of the leads in attendance.
One lead was a strong beginner making his way into the intermediate space. He was solid on his timing, footwork, and body motion. He primarily danced forward and back (LA Style) and his style felt a bit ballroomy.
A 2nd lead was an experienced social dancer. He had developed his own dance style blending what he danced growing up with years of social classes taken here and videos to expand his vocabulary. He was a bit more grounded than the others, gave a prepatory signal before almost every move, and we danced forward/back slot, laterally, at traveling diagonals, and rotationally. When he realized my experience-level, he tried some newer moves and we had fun working out the details of how he needed to signal the lead, my hand placements, footwork adjustments, and body positioning. (Note: We didn't stop dancing to work out the steps, we danced, messed up, improvised our way back into sync, and he re-led it over and over again until we were finally successful.)
The 3rd lead was from NY and danced NY style. He modified his dancing enough to dance on1 for me, but the movements were classic NY style with heavy Puerto Rican style influences. His dancing was the flashiest, loaded with shines, and overflowing with consecutive complex arm turns, waist catches, hip turns and pauses. I had to focus on connection so that I could respond to his movements and match his ebbs and flows of energy. (I was sweating and my heart was racing by the end of each dance.) It was a fun workout.
The 4th lead was a very chill LA Style dancer. His movements were unhurried and his focus was on good partnership connection, not big flashy consecutive moves. To the outside it probably looked like we were dancing in a simple manner but I could feel his technique and control in every step. He also had such good partnership connection that he could feel my muscle movements and when I anticipated his lead vs waiting for it - before I acted - and then called me out on it! I had to downshift to match his chill energy and wait for every deliberate lead. He wanted no unnatural movements from me to make a move work.
All 4 dance styles were super enjoyable in their own right, but none of them improved my ballroom salsa technique. And, I'm okay with that. I was there to connect and converse via dance with people in their own dialect and I did. It was a crash course in building stronger partnering skills and some really fun yet challenging tests on how I manage my body, space, self-awareness in relation to my different leaders.
Highlights of my night: The strong beginner said I was so easy to partner with and he felt like his mistakes didn't matter because I came back in, reconnected every time, and did some fancy footwork to make him look good. The NY style dancer complimented the breadth of my dancing skills, said I'm a really good dancer and a phenomenal follow. He obviously hasn't seen my foxtrot.
I especially appreciated how you embraced the variety without expecting it to "improve" your ballroom technique. That mindset of just being present and connecting is so refreshing. Also, the way you improvised with the second lead sounded like such a great example of mutual trust and exploration on the floor.
And those compliments you got? Totally deserved! It sounds like you brought out the best in each lead through your ability to listen, adapt, and support. That’s the mark of a truly great follow.
Thanks again for reviving the thread with such a thoughtful reflection—it reminded me why I love social dancing so much.
Back to claims that social dancing messes up my technique!
For the time being, husband and I agreed to go to the "beginner corale" at West Coast Wednesdays so I can get "mileage" on "beginnerish" things lead fairly well. (We aren't drafting a teacher to be superclear over to the corale for our own benefit. Husband has much more WCS experience than I do so he is perfect for this.) We want to focus on connection, having following be actually following.
(In my opinions, there is quite a bit of follow doin't 'whatever' when the lead leads 'whatever' in social West Coast. This is not stupendously helpful if you want to nail down "how to do basics correctly". Yes, I get that recovering when you fail to follow the lead is also a skill. But it would be nice to get some mileage on doing basics correctly in response to leads that are at least reasonably clear.)
Meanwhile, we went to a WCS lesson last night. The teacher focused on connection-- great!! We continued on variations that require better connection. GREAT!!!!
My last partner of the lesson was a friend who always goes to West Coast Wednesdays, and I discussed my scheme with him and the "whys" of my scheme. There are several whys. He agreed that all were valid. He has a regular partner too-- and he agrees that on both the lead and follow side there is a lot of "Lead does something ambiguous. Follow does 'whatever'. Lead is happy it worked!"
I also mentioned our scheme was working-- intermediates did NOT go over to ask either of us to dance! (For that matter, most the beginners are anxious to leave the beginner coral unless they draw the teacher as a partner! )
One of the things I told him is I have a list of patterns husband is "allowed" to lead. I know I can't hand the list to other leads at social dance!!
At the end he said, "Well, if I come over, you are going to have to give me 'your list' of acceptable patterns to lead!" Now I need to make a list and update as the list expands.
For the time being, husband and I agreed to go to the "beginner corale" at West Coast Wednesdays so I can get "mileage" on "beginnerish" things lead fairly well. (We aren't drafting a teacher to be superclear over to the corale for our own benefit. Husband has much more WCS experience than I do so he is perfect for this.) We want to focus on connection, having following be actually following.
(In my opinions, there is quite a bit of follow doin't 'whatever' when the lead leads 'whatever' in social West Coast. This is not stupendously helpful if you want to nail down "how to do basics correctly". Yes, I get that recovering when you fail to follow the lead is also a skill. But it would be nice to get some mileage on doing basics correctly in response to leads that are at least reasonably clear.)
Meanwhile, we went to a WCS lesson last night. The teacher focused on connection-- great!! We continued on variations that require better connection. GREAT!!!!
My last partner of the lesson was a friend who always goes to West Coast Wednesdays, and I discussed my scheme with him and the "whys" of my scheme. There are several whys. He agreed that all were valid. He has a regular partner too-- and he agrees that on both the lead and follow side there is a lot of "Lead does something ambiguous. Follow does 'whatever'. Lead is happy it worked!"
I also mentioned our scheme was working-- intermediates did NOT go over to ask either of us to dance! (For that matter, most the beginners are anxious to leave the beginner coral unless they draw the teacher as a partner! )
One of the things I told him is I have a list of patterns husband is "allowed" to lead. I know I can't hand the list to other leads at social dance!!
At the end he said, "Well, if I come over, you are going to have to give me 'your list' of acceptable patterns to lead!" Now I need to make a list and update as the list expands.
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You actually have a list of patterns by name in WCS ? From my remembering, there were 5 basic moves in one nomenclature, 14 in another (which were mostly variations of those 5). Ok, on the classes we had names for 5-10 usual moves/actions that were not made up from above 5 (and starter step wasn't included in those 5 I think), but ...
vit,
The whole point is to restrict to very, very little and stick to basics. My list is mostly basic things: Sugar Push, Left side pass, right side pass, whip, reverse whip. It's going to be tough if the list gets long. But I'm perfectly capable of making names up! He is not allowed to lead the step he named "dance monkey, dance!"
Naming elements works just as well as naming a whole move: For now, nothing with a hip catch, no "non swing moves". (That actually eliminates "dance monkey dance".) For now, nothing with a fold. ( I need to drag my husband into one of my lessons with Rhythm pro to discuss something about his leading the fold. Too long to discuss here.)
Even if the whole move doesn't have a name, some elements need work.
The teacher usually has names for thing. I used to never pay much attention but now if I'm going to have a list, I'm going to need to name them. But this would be untenable if the list became long or I was dancing with people generally.
The whole point is to restrict to very, very little and stick to basics. My list is mostly basic things: Sugar Push, Left side pass, right side pass, whip, reverse whip. It's going to be tough if the list gets long. But I'm perfectly capable of making names up! He is not allowed to lead the step he named "dance monkey, dance!"
Naming elements works just as well as naming a whole move: For now, nothing with a hip catch, no "non swing moves". (That actually eliminates "dance monkey dance".) For now, nothing with a fold. ( I need to drag my husband into one of my lessons with Rhythm pro to discuss something about his leading the fold. Too long to discuss here.)
Even if the whole move doesn't have a name, some elements need work.
The teacher usually has names for thing. I used to never pay much attention but now if I'm going to have a list, I'm going to need to name them. But this would be untenable if the list became long or I was dancing with people generally.