A Place to Vent

[DancingMommy]

My frustration is that the good, independent dance teachers don't advertise directly. Mostly business cards and word of mouth. Most of the studios that advertise are the big, big-budget franchise studios that I plan to avoid like the plague. So how do I find a new teacher? Hmm. Gotta give that some thought, but I bet groveling to the local USABDA president will be involved. LOL.

You going tonight???? And you don't have to grovel, LOL! Just take our spot from our coach! We're officially done til after the baby comes.

 

[pygmalion]

LOL. I'm sure a little groveling couldn't hurt. My only misgiving with your coach is that he's far away. I'll call him to find out if he does any teaching in Orlando itself. Longwood is kinda far -- a forty-five minute drive in each direction for a one hour lesson. But from what I've heard from you and others, the guy is great. Might be worth the drive.

 

[ballroomboilergirl]

Oooo! Talk about arrogance! I'm sorry that had to happen to you.

My venting has less to do with others, more to do with clubs. Now, hear this- I maybe 19, but I'm willing to pay cover and steer clear of the bar if only salsa clubs would let me in!! This is really more of a problem for me in Austin than in Dallas (I live in both areas)... How do the rest of you under 21's deal with this?

Ugh. This is quite possibly the BIGGEST issue I have come to have with ballroom dancing. Again, it sucks being the youngest member of a college ballroom dance team, especially when you can't go out salsa dancing with everyone after practice :cry:

I agree totally with SwinginBoo...we need to get the younger set involved in not only swing, but salsa and ballroom too...I believe that youth are indeed the future of dancesport, and how are we supposed to get them involved if they have nowhere to see these types of dancing? *shakes head*

I guess I don't really have any method of dealing with the "under 21" issue...it was kinda nice when I was at OSB because at least you can get into clubs in Ohio when you're 18, you just can't drink...once or twice one of the advanced team members has offered to try and get me a fake ID, but I'm not really down with breaking the law :? *sigh* Oh well, only 751 one more days until I can go out dancing with the team...

 

[DancingMommy]

LOL. I'm sure a little groveling couldn't hurt. My only misgiving with your coach is that he's far away. I'll call him to find out if he does any teaching in Orlando itself. Longwood is kinda far -- a forty-five minute drive in each direction for a one hour lesson. But from what I've heard from you and others, the guy is great. Might be worth the drive.

He has folks driving in from Jacksonville 2x a month and Daytona 2x a month, too! You wouldn't be setting a record for driving as far as I know, LOL!

I'm hoping we can make the dance tonight... Oh I'm hoping.... It depends on childcare... Mom promised to watch gabriella, but now she's trying to get out of it.... ARGH! My last night dancing before this one pops and I can't even get my mom to watch her..... WOE IS ME!

 

[DancingMommy]

I guess I don't really have any method of dealing with the "under 21" issue...

The problem is, most clubs don't make crud on the door... they make their $$$ from the bar... Since <21 can't use tha bar for it's intended purpose, most clubs opt not to open their doors to them. Also, another factor is that, unfortunately, most college kids have little disposable income. Clubowners know this and so don't cater to folks who can't spend the $$$ they need to keep the doors open.

One major swing venue here in Central Florida had no end of $$$ problems because of this. It was one factor that led to the demise of the "swing scene" here (amongst other things).

Also, some counties may have differing laws re: club attendance and minimum age.

One (Latin) club here has 21+ for guys and 18+ for girls. It's a nice scenario for us chicks.... But they only have "Latin Night" once a week.

 

[pygmalion]

Okay. Okay. I'll call him. Thanks for the recommendation. You're tops.

 

[SDsalsaguy]

One (Latin) club here has 21+ for guys and 18+ for girls. It's a nice scenario for us chicks.... But they only have "Latin Night" once a week.

This actually strikes me as setting the stage for some very slimy goings on...

 

[danceguy]

Well, this isn't much of a rant, but I must say its rather dissapointing that we don't have Friday night Salsa events in my area! However, my feet are still quite sore from the 2 nights I was out this week...but still Friday is all about going out to dance after a stressful workweek...and I'm sitting here at home and DF is empty! :?

I suppose I could go out Swing dancing...but I'm fully into Salsa these days and just focusing on one style to get my skills up to a more competent level.

So, we have Salsa events on Tuesday nights, and then on Sundays, they have two DIFFERENT ones put on by people who know each other. What the heck is up with that? Why not have one on Friday or Saturday, and then the other on Sunday?

Hmm, I may just have to go out of the area on Friday nights...because NO SALSA ON FRIDAY NIGHT REALLY SUCKS! :headwall:

I'll just have to make up for it this Sunday...three day weekend...I'll be out all night and morning dancing...and sleeping in come Monday like a true IRU member.

Hope y'all are out getting your groove on. Dance a few for me while you're out there. :wink:

Best,

SG

 

[pygmalion]

One (Latin) club here has 21+ for guys and 18+ for girls. It's a nice scenario for us chicks.... But they only have "Latin Night" once a week.

This actually strikes me as setting the stage for some very slimy goings on...

Not really. No slimier than they would have been otherwise.

The armband thing actually works pretty well. That transition age between 18 to 21 is tough, because most people in the 21-year-old group have lots of friends in the under-21 group.

 

[pygmalion]

Tonight I was at a dance and the same guy was there. He asks me to dance like it never happened. I accepted because I was one of the only followers at the dance (wind chill -45 degrees keeps the people away I guess). In the middle of the dance he stops me and is like, "I'm going to show you how to do this move, blah blah blah" he proceeded to talk to me like I had no idea what I was doing, when I could have followed him in my sleep. (FYI it was a slow WCS and he was not leading anything difficult). ARG!

Ok I should have said no to the dance tonight and asserted myself. But man, I was so angry. I felt like I could have choked him. That is so unlike me. Honest. I'm not a violent person. But oh it made me so mad!!!! :evil: :headwall:

ok...I think I feel a bit better now. Now it's your turn. Let it rip!

Boo, I'm officially joining your fan club. The mild-mannered, trying to be fair and nice, seething inside feeling I can definitely relate to. Oh, the sad, sad stories I could tell.

One thing that might work in this situation is humor. But tone of voice is EVERYTHING! If you can't slip in a little humor (sarcasm) withouit sounding angry, don't try this at home. But if you can, here's a possible script.

Bad guy: Would you like to dance? (Asks for dance after dissing Boo.)
Boo: Hmm. Wow. You really knocked me off my feet last week. I guess you want to try it again? said as sweetly as you can possibly manage.

The message would be delivered and received, but there's nothing he can say in return.

Passive/aggressive, I know, but what the heck!? :twisted: :wink: :lol:

 

[SwinginBoo]

Jenn that's hilarious! I might try it next time. Oh yes and it's definitely passive aggressive. :wink:

 

[peachexploration]

I'm realllyyyyy considering moving to a different place or planet. :evil: This has been the most frustrating dance year for me. AARRGGHHH! :headwall: Sorry, just needed to get that off my chest. :roll:

 

[TemptressToo]

Myself playing the devil's advocate...I'm all for not allowing under 21 in clubs. Having done some cocktail waitressing in a club that was 18+...I had a heck of a time with the minors. I cannot begin to tell you now many times I chased minors out of the bathroom while they waited for their "purchaser" AND have actually caught and turned in others caught in the act. When it is my reputation on the line, I simply don't play.

Of course, you are probably the exception to the rule as far as steering clear of the bar/patrons-that-will-buy-FOR-minors, etc...but the truth is...it is MUCH easier to do one's job when that job is not on the line due to underage drinking. There simply is no way around it. You can permanently magic marker the top of the hand, pass out wristbands, and card at the bar...it just doesn't eliminate the kids sitting in the corner in the dark getting somebody of age to buy for you.

I no longer waitress...and thankfully the establishment I worked at has now gone 21 and up...eliminating a lot of headache for some of my co-workers.

 

[Christina75]

On the subject of 21+ vs. all ages, I do think it's a money issue unfortuately When I was a regular swing dancer in Atlanta, it seemed to me that what lead to the decline in clubs offering "swing nights" was the lack of money they were taking in at the bar. Many would do the wristband thing for the over 21's but those of us who could drink usually didn't have the disposable income (think first year out of college and struggling to pay rent) or we just plain couldn't drink AND dance. Tipsy doesn't make for good coordination on the dance floor. Most of us would buy one beer or cocktail and nurse it. The clubs got so frustrated that some of them started charging $1 for a plastic cup of water that had previously been free.

Of course we weren't exactly willing to pay at the door either, so maybe the dancers were to blame for expecting free entertainment. I knew several people that would have a tantrum for having to pay $3 for parking.

The flame burned bright, but it burned out fast.
Christina

 

[pygmalion]

I'm realllyyyyy considering moving to a different place or planet. :evil: This has been the most frustrating dance year for me. AARRGGHHH! :headwall: Sorry, just needed to get that off my chest. :roll:

I missed this, peachexploration. Wanna talk?