I am just starting my journey into open smooth and have been thinking a lot about finding my own style and personality in my dancing especially since smooth has so many options and looks. Would love to hear from others if they are on this type of journey or any thoughts!
I'm just a couple of steps ahead of you on this journey. And I just wrote and deleted a big long post about how this whole
find my own style effort has gone in my partnerships, and what we've done to make progress, blow by painful blow. I even used bullet points.
And then I realized that all of it was just a lot of noise obscuring one simple idea:
You don't need to do anything to find your own style.
Your personal style is not something you build intentionally from scratch. It is instead an organic reflection of what you naturally do when nobody is telling you to do something else. In other words: If all you do is dance with emotion and abandon,
your style will find you. The only hard part is recognizing it, and leaning into it once you do. That part *is* intentional.
For example. My wife has always loved Tango and felt bored by Waltz. The edgy, arrogant, almost angry flavor of Tango is something she understands and can lean into, while the sentimentality and wistfulness of Waltz is just not something she feels on a regular basis.
Where we are now, instead of coaches trying to hammer a "proper" Waltz feeling into her, they instead have been helping us find a dark, edgy approach to Waltz. And we've been finding one; channeling something akin to Maleficent. A Queen of the Night who has been wronged by everyone and forgives none of it, but chooses to honor us by deigning to grace the floor for this dance anyway.
In addition, our best coaches have recognized that her favorite Tango emotion is not
passion, but
challenge. And they have been designing our choreography in a way that emphasizes that.
*******
And I reiterate: we didn't have to do anything to "find" or "figure out" that my wife favors this particular style. That is just the way she is! All we had to do was recognize it and start leaning into it.
Consider additional evidence: most of the folks posting so far have not had any trouble finding their style! Instead, they've been told that they should stop, hold back, and do something more bland and vanilla for a while, because learning and maintaining technique is much easier when you start with a generic template.
The downside to this, of course, is that you need to then give yourself permission to go back to unfettered, genuine emotion once the technique is sufficiently in place.
Or, as one of my visiting coaches sometimes says: "Learn clean. Then make a mess. Then clean it up." It sounds to me like you're in the prime stage to start making messes.