Are followers in smaller communities pickier?

[itwillhappen]

Something else I’ve seen is breaking away from the typical tanda system. What I’ve seen is some DJs starting the night with two or three song tandas at milongas. But more interestingly is what comes about when there are live performers. I’ve been to a few events that start with 4 song tandas but at around 10 pm a live band plays and typically people just dance with each other for one or two songs before switching partners.

The DJ makes the rules. I often switch from 4 to 3 tangos and valses later on when the dancers' attention span starts to suck.

 

[itwillhappen]

Same. The way women have used cabeceo in my city/(maybe country?) has made me a bit more sexist in a somewhat ironic way. What I mean by that is that the majority of followers who insist on men using it, don't really adhere to the rules to it themselves and/or they aren't active in looking out for cabeceos, so whenever I hear most women preach about being so absolute about it I semi internally roll my eyes.
It just goes back to my own philosophy of watching people's actions instead of what they actually say.

Without exception, everyone at a milonga believes what they're doing is right, or at least justified! Their minds then readily offer a kind of justification born of necessity, claiming they're so disadvantaged and have to somehow fight their way through. And rules are readily invented.

I allow myself the luxury, except with close friends of course, of insisting on some kind of informal mirada/cabeceo; otherwise, I simply don't dance. I'm not needy as I can always dance comfortably with my girlfriend. So what?

 

[itwillhappen]

- uuups, wrong thread -