Connection and Eye contact
- Thread starter Flatfoot
- Start date
I would put it that way:
If the connection works as it should be i am aware of my partner like i am aware of myself, so looking at my partner seems to me on a fundamental level as nonsensical as looking at my own feet. I am aware of her like i am aware of myself. One some level we are becoming extensions of each other and dance as one. And this state of communicating deeply enough that we are more 1.5 persons than 2 is what i am lookign for, and i actually feel that checking on my partner if she is really where i feel she is, and where she communicates she is through the embrace disrupts this.
If i dance by myself i don't look at myself. So when i dance with a partner i basically look exactly where i would look if i danced alone - seeing the flow of the dancefloor, trying not to bump into people, trying not to be bumped into.
In some ways i think "concentrating on ones partner" is a step on the way to being able to really dance as a couple, not as two separate people. Or that i don't really understand the geometry of what i am leading. In practicas checking if your partner is where you feel she is is a good learning tool, but if i dance and i loose her enough to no longer knowing where her weight is and how our geometry is i feel i have probably done something quite wrong.
Apologies for the bad metaphor - followers of course have more agency that a piece of machinery (one of my friends tells beginning leaders "Hey, i am a person, not your dance tool")- but it is like driving a car - i don't look at the shifter, or the pedals, or the instruments, i know where everythign is, i hear and feel where the shifting points are, i know how fast i am going because i know which gear i am in, and how the car feels at the moment. If i need to look i am doing exactly the opposite of concentrating on the car and driving, i am trying to make up for the fact that i don't understand what is happeing.
Gssh
Mad Tango Scientist
Member
I'm surprised that I am the only one here that enjoys eye contact and a visual tango connection. Maybe it's because I do a lot of soltada like moves that require physical separation, but I find that eye contact is very valuable for leading certain movements and is where the connection goes when the physical connection separates and is the first thing to connect before coming together, before the bodies can reconnect. I think that it would be extremely difficult to do a lot of Neuvo dancing without eye contact. Also, I find eye contact to be very playful at times which fits my style of dancing.
Also, I was trained by my tango teacher to see with my peripheral vision for navigation and use my eyes and head to dance. One time when I was dancing, a follow pointed down at the floor at something someone had dropped and after answering her, she started becoming angry with me for "not even looking at what she was pointing at." Well, I saw it with my peripheral vision and did not want to look at it directly, because I was trained to lead with my eyes and never look down while on the dance floor.
I think part of it may be that I get a bit bored of the dancing as one thing and I encourage independence in my partners and very much enjoy when my partners do something creative and unexpected which requires a looser connection at times, which is where eye contact becomes so very important.
Also, I was trained by my tango teacher to see with my peripheral vision for navigation and use my eyes and head to dance. One time when I was dancing, a follow pointed down at the floor at something someone had dropped and after answering her, she started becoming angry with me for "not even looking at what she was pointing at." Well, I saw it with my peripheral vision and did not want to look at it directly, because I was trained to lead with my eyes and never look down while on the dance floor.
I think part of it may be that I get a bit bored of the dancing as one thing and I encourage independence in my partners and very much enjoy when my partners do something creative and unexpected which requires a looser connection at times, which is where eye contact becomes so very important.
opendoor
Forum Master
You sound like one of those evil nuevo style dancers.
Just kidding. Welcome to the Tango Forum.
I guess when all physical connection of any sort is gone, eye contact would become desirable. For me, eye contact is only useful for cabeceos.
Peaches
Well-Known Member
Hi!
I dunno. I dance a lot of nuevo (or did, before I backed off dancing and lessons for other reasons) and never found eye contact to be anything more than problematic and distracting.
Mad Tango Scientist
Member
I have been focusing on Nuevo, the last three years and am definitely evil, but not quite evil enough to dance Neuvo on a crowded floor, and I am strongly grounded in more traditional styles. Thanks for the warm welcome!
Mad Tango Scientist
Member
One amazing thing about Tango is that everyone has a different approach that works for them.
Mad Tango Scientist
Member
You havnt read my post, compagñero
And wellcome to DF
Thanks for the warm welcome. I think that I understand and agree with your post and it has many similar concepts to mine.
I wouldn't say that i don't enjoy eye-contact, i mainly reacted strongly to the idea that eye contact is a neccessary prerequisite for being connected with my partner/ concentrating on her. In general i find for my dancing that i consider a physical connection to be more fundamental - in close embrace there is no eye-contact possible, and even iwhen we open up the embrace the embrace tells me more about where my partner is than i can see. Of course we make eye-contact, but it is more often an nice extra when we pause than something that is important while we stay in the general flow of the dancefloor. I vastly prefer making eye connections with other couples over physical connections, though
Overall i would find it much easier to dance tango without any eye connection, like e.g. when the follower closes her eyes, than without any physical connection. (though i have done this as an exercise i really would not want to try it on a dancefloor)
Gssh
opendoor
Forum Master
Only want to remind, that traditional tango dancing is rather a new and modern phenomenon. So some dancers might not remember how we used to dance in the gone century. In neo dancing the head got a totally different role than in traditional tango: It projects the direction, it opens the space, it escorts the movement. The leader´s head constantly is on the move, while the follower looks at your face or sternum (which is equivalent to connection in traditional tango): so how silly would it be not to glance and smile back at your DP but to evade her eyes? As a girl I would refuse dancing with such an inhibited guy!
newbie
Well-Known Member
I usually evade the follower's eyes as much as I can, as I avoid looking into my cat's eyes (it will attack). Once in a while, when in a playful mood and with the right partner & music I may roleplay a little and look into my partner's eyes for one second during a pause, at the beginning of the song, or the end, or when the music/lyrics suggest a pause.
maldigo ahora del fondo de mi alma
la ilusión lejana que tu boca mintió.
Mad Tango Scientist
Member
Yes, I find that I am constantly glancing into her eyes and then pulling away again. It's not a staring competition because of the constant movement, but rather fleeting glances that are often flirty, playful, or even just acknowledgement of a movement that feels amazing. For me, they add another dimension to the dance. It's so amazing that someone on the other side of the globe has the same experiences as me.